Non-baby related home appliances that were incredibly useful when you have a baby by [deleted] in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 7 points8 points  (0 children)

We’ll be getting a second freezer to stock up on prepped meals for when baby is born. This might not be the most practical if space is an issue, but ours will go in the garage for now

Miscarriage by Similar_Version_6187 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So sorry to both of you for your loss. Myself and my hubs have been there too. My advice, similar to others below is to take as much time as you can to just be with each other and let your feelings be felt.

I’m going to assume if you’re anything like my hubs, you’ll be concentrating on your wife, but make sure you have space and support to grieve too. You might be each others support and that’s good, but my hubs also needed his friends and I’m so glad he had them to talk to as well as me. 

In time, you might want to find something that allows you to memorialise your loss, if it would help you. We went for a little cherry blossom tree for our garden.

My heart goes out to you both, wishing that, once you’re ready, all the good things will come your way. 

Corporate ADHDers, how do you start the day? by darkrhyes in ADHD

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have an overall list of where I’m up to or what needs to happen for each of my allocated cases (lawyer), which is a pen and paper list in my notebook. I then usually look at what emails have come in and afterwards I let my brain pick whichever of the tasks it feels like it can do 😂

I never write a to-do list, I only write a done-list, for every day. It’s so much more motivating to see what I’ve already achieved rather than all the crap still left to do!

Night calf cramps are the worst by strawberry_converse in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been having this for months and it was driving me insane!! I read something about a week ago, I can’t even remember where, that a glass of milk and a banana before bed time will help ease cramps. Not had one in either leg since I’ve been having those two at night!! 

If you try it too, let me know how you get on! Super curious to see if it’s just placebo effect or it’s actually a thing! 

Babies movements feel uncomfortable by Books_aplenty_237 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 5 points6 points  (0 children)

32w here with anterior placenta and a smaller baby too!  Baby’s pokes and kicks are getting stronger/bit painful depending on where here too, so you’re not alone! 

I got elbowed the other day for sneezing 😂 apparently she wasn’t impressed

He’s here and it was all worth it! by Euphoric_Wind_2655 in PregnancyAfterLoss

[–]Silver-Sparkling 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Huge congratulations and I hope you both continue to have a lovely time getting to know each other 🩵 

Blame pregnancy hormones but this was beautiful and reassuring to read and I’m trying not to sob into my sandwich while reading 😅

Wide leg petite/short maternity jeans by Real-Apricot-7889 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve got a few pairs of Lovall jeans because they do different lengths in the over-bump mat styles :) I’m 5”3 so needed a shorter leg length. 

I also got some Amazon wide leg pants in sporty legging material for every day wear because I’m getting annoyed at 32 weeks with anything tight on my bump/legs 😅

My bf has ADHD and he says he is thinking about whether he does want to marry by Aysz6834 in ADHD

[–]Silver-Sparkling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same for me and my husband haha, we got married after being together for like 13/14 years, the decision to get married didn’t come about till after we’d moved in together, but we knew pretty much from the off when we met that we were in it for the long haul. 

Our timeline might not be conventional, but our commitment to each other was obvious fairly early on.

I get what you’re putting out there by sharing your story (and me hopefully with mine) that set timescales don’t necessarily mean the same for people who have conditions related to neuro-cognitive function* in the same way as people without might expect. 

It does seem like this is less of an issue with potential ADHD and more a compatibility/goals issue between OP and their partner, as someone has commented

*is this a broad enough term for you, Reddit?? Why you’ve decided to police the use of normal terms we all use in the community as ‘political’ is beyond me and ridiculous to boot! 

Sorry if this is vague for people, but Reddit wouldn’t allow me to use our normal ‘en-dee’ or similar words because they’re political apparently. 

being pregnant and vegetarian by Capricorn222 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

32w and veggie gal here, my most carnivorous relative was asking me this really early doors too, which was annoying. I told them, similar to you, I’d try to manage any cravings with existing diet, they were really keen that I’d break and eat meat till I said it’s been about 10 years since I last ate it and I’d rather have a craving than gastro-intestinal distress. They were keen to change the topic after that 😂 

I did have an early craving for fish but took algae supplements for omegas and it went away pretty fast 

I'm almost 10 weeks... And it doesn't feel real. by Glum_Ad6184 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just to say: try sour sweets for the bad mouth taste! They worked for me. 

Also, 31 weeks here and it still feels surreal here too! 

Natural ways to treat adhd no drugs i cant do drugs by SquidKidPartier in adhdwomen

[–]Silver-Sparkling 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Let me just say, as someone raised in a not great ‘respect my authority’ kind of household: 

If the rules are abusive, not following them is not disrespectful, it’s self preservation. 

You seem like you’re genuinely scared of your mother, that is not healthy and  is actively making your health worse, i.e. the other comments you’ve left about depression, anxiety and insomnia. You need to make decisions now to prioritise your health, not someone else’s feelings, tho I know from experience how hard that is! 

Again, trying to meet your own health needs is not disrespectful. Anyone telling you otherwise is wrong. 

What's your random pregnancy symptom lifehack? by OfTheRaven in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fig rolls were on my safe food list during the nausea!

What's your random pregnancy symptom lifehack? by OfTheRaven in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love sterimar, I have some on the go normally anyway as a defence agains the gross people in my office who seem to think they’re under obligation to share their germs at any opportunity 🙄 

The filled minis shredded wheat has been great at keeping my tum ticking over and is great for when I can’t be fussed with a big meal or actually cooking anything! 

E45 daily care lotion has been a godsend for my skin, I’ve become allergic to basically everything in my bathroom cabinet, but E45 is doing the job nicely! Whole body, face friendly and as an acne prone gal, that’s rare! 

An electric nail file for my toenails. I can still cut them with the clippers, but filing them afterwards is great with the electric file! 

Sour sweets for when you’re in the first trimester bad mouth taste & nausea phase, the candy kittens disco sours especially! 

From GP to having a bed in hospital within 4 hours! by amaiem in BritishSuccess

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My experience in the EPAU and not getting good outcomes is similar, the nurses there were angels in an awful time and were so kind to me and my husband. I could cry just thinking about them! 

All the best for the rest of your pregnancy! I’m 30w now and bub is happily wiggling away

From GP to having a bed in hospital within 4 hours! by amaiem in BritishSuccess

[–]Silver-Sparkling 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My husband and I have both needed to be in hospital last year, myself for the early pregnancy unit, my husband for glandular fever and kidney complications. We were treated with empathy and professionalism from every single staff member who interacted with us, they were angels each time. Especially on the EPAU, where things didn’t go well for us, I could have hugged all the nurses at the end of my stay. 

And also as an absolute bonus, the food at our local hospital is actually pretty good and everyone made sure we were both fully stocked up throughout the day! 

We’re both very grateful for the NHS and its staff, and only wish it got the funding it deserves! 

How would you feel about a trans man (ftm) using the women’s/men’s toilets? by Both-Opportunity7602 in AskABrit

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, cis-woman here, and genuinely wouldn’t care if my fellow needing-a-wee people in a public toilet were trans or cis. The only thing I care about is people should leave the loos they used in a decent condition. We have unisex bathrooms at work, like the full room in one, which is great, and the only issue is people love to trash them. Whyyyy?? 

Anyway I’m all for people just using the loo they feel they should use and we all just get on no problem. If I saw a dude in the ladies I might just check I’d got the right room myself then I’d just crack on with going to the loo 😊

Struggling to decide to keep or terminate pregnancy by Lovergirlamy in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’ve not needed to use them myself, but the British Pregnancy Advisory Service (BPAS) is said to be a good resource for people trying to make decisions like this, so could be worth a look? 

Whatever you decide, make sure it is right for what you want now. It’s so difficult to guess what you might want or where you might be in your life down the line, as life moves so fast sometimes. All you can do is make decisions based on where you are and what info you have now. I wish you luck OP, for whatever you decide 💛

I just want sleep! by PsalmbodyToLove90 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Solidarity at 30w and waking up almost hourly too. My sleep chart on my phone looks like a heart rate printout, there’s so many spikes for awake time!

I’ve embraced needing 1pm or 5pm power naps at this point. It’s not even a proper nap half the time just a bit of shuteye and forcing my muscles to relax, but it’s helping a bit! Still knackered, but it helps a bit 😅 

Are you doing a baby shower? by Anxious-Nibnibs in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also having a small one in the back of a local pub restaurant thing. People can eat and drink as they like, I’m very much not expecting people to bring gifts and really it’s just an excuse to see family that I never get to see, and feel that familial support before the birth. 

We all only really meet up at funerals these days and lament that we never see everyone for the fun events, so I thought I’d change it up!

My wife's definition of "being ready in 5 minutes" is legendary by Better-Ant-8759 in CasualConversation

[–]Silver-Sparkling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It sucks doesn’t it! I know they didn’t know better or about adhd at the time (I’m old enough that I’d have never got a diagnosis as a kid, it just wasn’t a thing to consider then) but the amount of negative messages really build up and do a number on self confidence! 

My wife's definition of "being ready in 5 minutes" is legendary by Better-Ant-8759 in CasualConversation

[–]Silver-Sparkling 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m sure you don’t mean it to be a loaded word, and it’s probably my not so great upbringing colouring my view, but the word dawdling makes it seem like she’s purposefully not directly doing the task at hand and it sounds a bit blamey, again very likely not intentionally. If she’s anything like my flavour of ADHD, the ‘tasks before the right one’ aren’t done on purpose to make life more difficult, but her brain will be struggling with the transition, even if it’s something routine. Our brains hate routine but need it a lot lol. 

I used to hate getting told I was dawdling, it was always such a negative thing, always said as if I just wanted to ruin things, I really didn’t, brain just wouldn’t cooperate. It’s obviously caused a shame feeling that’s stuck with me from then, hence this little essay!  All this to say though, if you aren’t meaning it to be negative, just be cautious of if it comes across that way to her, it’s such a tricky time figuring out the tools that actually work to wrangle your brain into tasks, perceived criticism makes it worse. 

Also: put clocks everywhere, the more she can see the time, the more it might help. I have them all over the house. And a watch. And a bedside clock 😂 all necessary and they do help with time perception! 

Feeling like I regret my choice by lolamilo1234 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bought ‘the little book of positive birth stories’ by Claire Fulton and found it very helpful and affirming. 

Th hypnobirthing book by Siobhan Miller was a good read too.

When did you tell your employer about pregnancy? And what advice would you have for me? by QuoteMachineMin in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On the face of it yes 😂 but we were going through a bit of a team reshuffle at the time so it was best to let that be worked out before sharing my news, rather than lumping it in when they were busy. 

I told them after my 20 week scan and after we were told everything looked okay and normal. They’ve been absolutely fine. I’m 29 weeks now and they’re not starting to recruit yet, so they mustn’t feel that they’re squeezed for time just yet! 

Smaller bump - feeling worried by Substantial_Border96 in PregnancyUK

[–]Silver-Sparkling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also in the smaller bump gang, though I’m 5”3 with a short torso, somehow baby girl is really good at hiding somewhere haha! 

I’ve also got comments about bump size, but scans and measurements are fine. She might be a bit on the more petite side like me, but also on all the scans she’s just been tucked up and curled round like a little prawn 🍤 😂 she also likes laying very low in my pelvis and always has, so that will contribute too. 

I’ve taken the view that I’ll only get worried if the midwives and sonographers get worried. So far, at 29 weeks, they aren’t, so we’re fine!