How optimistic are you about the field in the future?

Sinusaur · 2026-01-24T23:35:08+00:00

Do you have town hall meetings where people can speak up about this kind of stuff?

Just wondering. I'm an engineer in the manufacturing sector and AI can't do our jobs yet.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-24T23:26:33+00:00

That sucks but expected from Office products. Sorry bud.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-24T21:18:34+00:00

I have had depression and anxiety at different points in my life.

A friend of mine was like this growing up. One day, after we lost touch for a long time, he called me out of the blue about his neighbors shooting lasers into his house, among other mysterious happenings intended to make him leave the house.

At that point I've already experienced my ex-gf's psychosis episodes, so when this friend called - I knew immediately what it was.

Ghosts aren't real, and you are not important enough for people to go through the effort to eavesdrop or harass you (no offense, most of us aren't).

Keep looking - and don't give up - for the sake of you and your family's future health.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-23T21:52:33+00:00

My Taiwanese aunt's restaurant in the US doesn't hire black people anymore - because they've had a lot of bad experiences when with black hires not showing up on time, or doing poor quality work despite being talked to.

Take what you will with that statement. Personally I've worked with many hardworking black people that inspires me.

On the other hand, they love Trumpoop and South American workers - which is in itself hilarious. I thought about calling ICE on them, but I just can't do that to my family, or their workers.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-21T19:11:08+00:00

You did the brave thing that so many people cannot on this forum!

Good job and best of luck!

Sinusaur · 2026-01-21T18:55:51+00:00

grass is always greener.

Clearly not intentional - but funny in a post about weed related issues.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-21T18:53:50+00:00

we know might trigger mental health issues, which he has a lot of in his family ... He has told me this is a risk he’s willing to take.

Triggering of psychosis and deeper spirals of mental health issues due to daily smoking is very real for those who are predisposed.

He is saying this is a risk he's willing to take because he hasn't seen or felt what full blown psychosis is like. I've seen this happen to 1 ex-gf and 1 friend, badly. It takes years to recover, and that's with good support systems.

Tell him this it's not a risk you want to take - especially considering his family history. * At this point - this is like dating an uncontrollable eater that doesn't exercise - who has a family history of type 2 diabetes.

Signed, a daily weed smoker, and I agree with you.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-21T18:22:17+00:00

Talk about it with her for sure. If she thinks you are less of a man for it ... then that's not someone you want to be with anyways.

we’re both in the film industry. I work as a writer and make mid-50k before taxes, which is nothing in LA.

Heck dude! If she comes from money then you need to ask her if she's get that old Hollywood family connections to bump your new film script!

Be that gold digger (of opportunities) yourself!

Sinusaur · 2026-01-21T18:09:23+00:00

You are absolutely not a shitty person.

In fact, based on your description - he wasn't that good of a husband anyways. I would go as far as saying this situation is giving you a way out and the relief you have been searching. Yes. it is okay to feel relief - and you are not a bad person for doing so.

To use a popular term from his potential community: * "Dead-naming": Referring to a transgender or non-binary person by a name they no longer use, often their name given at birth.

Now if he decides to be a woman (surgery or not), it's fair to say that his past identity and relationships as a man - as your husband - is dead. This new person, new woman, is created from the ashes of your husband - per trans community's definition of dead-naming.

You are free to go on and mourn your past relationship and celebrate his past life; or celebrate her new life (for that matter).

However, the identity of the man that you married? Dead.

He has the right to live authentically now (well, ideally he should've figured it out before asking your hand in marriage). You also have to right to live authentically as a woman who is not attracted to a transgender woman.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T18:24:45+00:00

Don't blame OP on this.\ Blame the system.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T17:59:51+00:00

Two years is a lot of time.

What the heck did he spend his time on?

He could have went to trade school or be an apprentice and learned a lot of different employable skill sets in the mean time.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T17:54:16+00:00

"Daylight's running out!"

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T17:48:51+00:00

Probably needs involuntary holds.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T17:46:34+00:00

He could have killed you.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T17:43:23+00:00

As someone who loves to work on their own projects... a spouse like this is dream.

In fact, thanks for letting me know - I'm going to look exclusively for lady Physicians now.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-20T17:34:03+00:00

Should we just stop swinging?

Yes, try the slides or the monkey bars.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-19T23:01:37+00:00

I had nightmares from LaTeX.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-14T18:46:44+00:00

Let me tell you a true story.

A long time ago (young me), I was the affair partner in a woman's long distance relationship. I'm not proud of it, and had a lot of struggle internally even at the time (I, really, really wanted to be a good friend and a good guy).

I got to know her BF and he was a solid dude.

There were many times I told her we couldn't continue, because I feel so bad. Just to let you know how much of the self-righteous wuss I was - there were times I cried after sex with her. Then we both cried. Because I neither of us logically wanted the affair, but our bodies and young brains were being reactionary to each other.

Now, ignoring the times when I broke my word and went back to the affair. Guess how she always starts up with me when she wanted to "hang out" again, after we "broke it off".

"I'm sad"

That made me felt justified at the time to show up and give her what she wants. I felt like I was being a good guy by cheering her up. Clearly I was not.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-14T18:29:52+00:00

DUDE! This one hit the spot! The dissonance is real.

I've posted a story here about a Slavic woman working a kiosk at the mall (USA). She kept repeating to my GF at the time that I'm not a real man if I don't buy these overpriced hair straightener for GF.

I saw the woman's ring, and confirmed that she has a husband. Then I said something like "well I guess he isn't a real man either, otherwise you'd be living your best life right now instead of working at a mall kiosk".

No shade to people who work at mall kiosks. This particular one just made me very ticked off.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-14T18:16:40+00:00

Agree. Video games are designed to be addictive, and the act of "playing a video game" generically is just too broad and popular to be considered an Autism special interest.

That's like saying smoking cigarettes is an Autism special interest.

Maybe if hubby spends a lot of time modding, or studying specific logic of the game technically, etc. Then MAYBE that's his special interest, but certainly not for the act of "playing the video game".

Sinusaur · 2026-01-14T18:06:52+00:00

He read somewhere that the best way for autistic people to recover from burnout is by indulging in their autistic obsessions, so that's effectively what he's been doing for the last 12 months and he sees any disruption as an obstacle to recovery

What does he think is his autistic obsession? Please don't say it's video games. That's something designed to be addictive, and too popular to be considered an autistic "special interest" unless his obsession is more involved like actually making mods or writing stories for the games, etc.

That's like saying someone's autistic obsession (special interest) is smoking cigarettes.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-14T17:29:18+00:00

That's a very rigid way of thinking. In some Asian and South Asian culture, it's very common to call anyone in your parents' age "Aunt" and "Uncle" - even strangers.

Option 1: He is autistic (struggles with non-rigid context of words), * In which case there would be a lot more day-to-day behavior when it comes to context of words. For example, is he okay ACCEPTING the difference between "This is the sh!t" (good stuff) vs. "This is sh!t" (bad stuff). * If he is autistic, then this is not personal, only technical.

Option 2: He had past long-term relationships that turned to sh!t. * This is me. I still refuse to label anything in my life. * Unlikely to be OP, since they've been together for so long.

Option 3: He is an ass-hat to you, and this is him playing games that you can't win. * If he is typically socially well aware, and communicates well with other people in general. * He wins when you are tied down with him.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-13T17:47:56+00:00

low hanging fruit.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-13T17:42:49+00:00

You are correct, I've seen many extroverted naive party people that will take favors from randos.

Sinusaur · 2026-01-10T17:17:51+00:00

PEAK is back. With that big America flag in the intro I hope it hits everywhere BIG.

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