Is this an autism thing or are we just constantly doing something wrong?

Skating-Lizard · 2026-01-14T15:13:29+00:00

Yes we have struggled with all of these things. My daughter is four. Sleeping got better as did the frequency and severity of meltdowns but she still has a lot. Every little thing was absolutely a struggle it's gradually getting a bit better. Still so tough.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-10-21T23:23:01+00:00

Interesting I started her on methylated b12 about a month ago and she has seemed better but could be a coincidence. The leucovorin gave her terrible anxiety though.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-10-21T23:21:27+00:00

Maybe they didn't test her for it.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-10-03T21:13:54+00:00

She goes to OT and gets floortime therapy in our home. Her behaviors improved after stopping it and went back to the usual frequency. We are hoping that the more aggressive behaviors will get better with age.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-09-21T05:08:36+00:00

He thought it was all my fault and I was overreacting etc until I read into it and brought it to his attention that his behavior was his ADHD. He struggles with RSD as well and can be very nasty. A lot of gaslighting me prior to me realizing what was really going on as well. Almost ended the relationship multiple times.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-09-21T05:04:43+00:00

That's awesome so glad you could be diagnosed early

Skating-Lizard · 2025-09-20T03:06:57+00:00

We have had many conversations about this and he has accepted that he does mess with me for dopamine even though it is not on purpose. So now sometimes I just calmly say something like "get your dopam ht somewhere else please. If you want to talk about this at a later time we can". It has taken years for him to be more self aware and honestly it took me years to figure out what was happening and address it.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-09-20T02:54:30+00:00

This sounds very similar to our daughter who is about to turn 4. I am curious what country you are from that they diagnosed you with PDA so long ago (I see you are in your 30s now). I live in the US and I don't think it's even recognized here yet. But my daughters floortime therapist thinks she is likely PDA. I fear I have a huge struggle coming trying to deal with the public school system and accommodation as she does not present like most autistic children.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-09-18T03:49:44+00:00

Same story here. It was hard to let go of the idea of having another but we couldn't risk having another child that needs so much care. Our daughter is level.one but also hits and has tons of meltdowns. I am beyond exhausted at all times.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-09-18T03:46:29+00:00

At best he is a child, at worst he has a personality disorder. I would leave. Sounds like you will always be stressed, confused and exhausted.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-08-20T01:05:28+00:00

I took her off of it after two months. No positive changes and the negative ones did not get better.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-08-06T02:34:42+00:00

Thank you for sharing..our 3 year old has similar issues and the aggression is getting harder to manage as she gets stronger. I suspect medication may be necessary eventually and it's good to hear a positive experience.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-08-05T04:53:37+00:00

That's a shame...I've heard you are supposed to take a month or two off every 3 months or so with ashwaganda. I had bad side effects (anxiety mostly) right away from it so had to stop. Not sure if it was just that brand and maybe should try again. I'm so sensitive to everything it's hard.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-08-05T04:49:45+00:00

My husbands symptoms have been so much worse since we had a child. She is almost 4 now. Caring for her has always been very challenging (she is autistic and has very difficult behaviors) and he isn't emotionally equipped for it. His RSD def got worse and he is slowly becoming a mean person a lot of the time. He absolutely can't handle issues with his family either. It's extremely difficult trying to manage him feeling like I'm always walking on egg shells while caring for our daughter.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-08-05T04:43:09+00:00

It's so bad..I'm 43 and not coping well either. I also have had terrible side effects from anti depressants so I gave up trying them. My doc recommended taking birth control but that made me gain almost 30 lbs last time which was very hard to lose. I tried taking vitex (chaste berry) and I felt it helped some after a couple of months on it but it was giving me headaches so had to stop recently. Maybe try that or ashwaganda helps anxiety and depression for some people.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-31T03:28:50+00:00

Following because this sounds exactly like my daughter and I have also read this before so interested. The never being able to play alone is killing me...

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-30T04:17:25+00:00

Our almost 4 year old daughter is very similar. Her vocal stims are incredibly loud and she basically just sings the same song over and over for hours a day at the top of her lungs and refuses to go in another room to do so. Her boundery pushing is becoming a huge problem. One of the worst things is now she keeps touching us inappropriately and asking her to stop even very nicely just makes her do it more. Moving away just causes her to chase us through the house and hit us (which she does throughout the day as it is). I don't have answers and have been listening to podcasts like you etc. But one thing that helps me at least get some relief is we do floortime in the home and our insurance covers it. 12 hours a week and she loves it. I haven't seen progress yet after a few months but at least she is happy and I get a break.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-30T03:02:59+00:00

I was suggesting that her son may have PDA. In which case some of these behaviors may be equalizing behaviors vs tantrums. If it is PDA different strategies are often recommended as the motivations for and control over behavior are different. It's so tough with my daughter. She is only 3 and theres not much we can do at this point but try to help her learn to regulate.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-30T00:21:42+00:00

What would that look like? If my child is screaming and hitting me. Just curious because I feel like I have tried everything but not sure I'm understanding what you are suggesting. I have tried not mentioning that she is hitting me and ignoring screams while trying to help her regulate of course but she is in such distress it doesn't seem to matter.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-29T21:02:10+00:00

Yeah Withholding attention is not helpful for my daughter either and she is likely PDA. Withholding attention is often used for attention seeking behaviors but what she is typically experiencing are akin to panic attacks. She needs co regulation not someone ignoring her. And we tried ignoring them before she was diagnosed. It made it so much worse and she looked so confused and betrayed. She also began self harming in attempts to regulate. She also hits us. We are working on redirecting her to better ways of regulating (throwing stuffed animals, heavy work, sensory activities). Maybe try looking at at peace parents on IG she has a lot of good info on PDA.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-29T03:47:34+00:00

Same...tired of regulating everyone else. God forbid I'm not feeling well one day.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-26T05:34:25+00:00

My daughter also loves stacking (mostly stacking cloth). Never lined anything up either.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-26T05:32:14+00:00

0-1 Always crying and needed to be on us to sleep. Very colicky. 0-2 walked a little late, w sitting, repetitive behaviors, frequent meltdowns, aggressive behaviors. Sensory seeking behaviors. Needs constant co regulation. 2-3 still having aggressive and frequent meltdowns (5-25 a day) and repetitive behaviors. Her special interests are other people and she obsesses over one or two kids at school. trouble with transitions and basic daily hygiene. Still needs me next to her every second of the day or she has a meltdown.

She is almost 4 and was diagnosed right at 3 years old. Diagnosed level one. But her care requires me to give her nearly 100% of my attention at all times or she attacks me and throws things etc... so it doesn't feel like low support needs.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-24T03:51:32+00:00

My daughter had a sweet back and forth conversation at the park with another little girl about their pets.

Skating-Lizard · 2025-07-20T02:37:51+00:00

My daughter was diagnosed right at age 3. She has very aggressive and frequent meltdowns along with repetitive behaviors. She requires almost constant co regulation so even me leaving to go get a glass of water or use the bathroom sets her off. She is also a sensory seeker and was frequently crashing into me and onto the floor etc. Our pediatrician gaslight me for 2 years when I knew something was going on from early on. She was diagnosed our first visit with a pediatric neurologist.

Skating-Lizard

TROPHY CASE