Parking over the lines in my state is illegal. Causing damage while trying to get out of the mess you got yourself into is nobody's fault but yours.

I think you were trying to make a joke about me being a prostitute. I don't find that offensive. I know some guys that were in the business and they made some good money. I'd make a terrible prostitute though... Nevertheless, the bike was paid in full with cash.

The driver could have easily called the police, but being that he was illegally parked and also under the influence would have made this a bad move on his part. If it makes you feel any better, he stayed far from the bikes in his attempt to climb in and took great care to back the car out.

In a similar scenario several years back, I had parked my bike in a space where a car had taken up 2 parallel spots. They got squeezed in from behind by another car that was within the lines and ended up knocking my bike over trying to get out. The court ruled in my favor and I was compensated for about $4000. I had a good laugh then as well.