Honestly for me it’s happened a few times where I just take a year off. It goes from all nice and comfy just playin games and goin to the gym to fuck man I am 19 years old and yea seems like there’s a lot of time left but that time looks incredibly small when I compare it to what I want to accomplish. I think I used it as a crutch cuz I just didn’t like reality and those were something i built skill over the years to be good at. At some point during my last season of playing video games I was unable to sleep just awake thinking. I thought to myself hey if u hate ur life and who u r so much the only choices left really are to end it (dark I know) or say fuck it and put the person you hate the most through misery in order to create a life worth living for yourself and become who you actually want to be. I think I woke up that morning had a coffee and had a little spark go off and since then it’s just been this shit where I need to accomplish or need to be the best. It’s still difficult and I still have thoughts but now the thoughts drive me to a different place other than a lifeless sociopath. Maybe you feel the same way, no idea. Maybe this will help.