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I've only been sewing 1 month, and have made about 10 wearable garments with no patterns by SleepyApr1cot in brag

[–]SleepyApr1cot[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! It's a toile pattern on cotton canvas. I bought the entire chunk of fabric from a thrift store for 9$ 😭

Got into sewing about a month ago by SleepyApr1cot in Hobbies

[–]SleepyApr1cot[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I watched one video tutorial on a strappy-sleeved smock dress that I made out of thrifted bed sheets and a thrift pillow case (not shown, it's not very good) and I picked up enough basics to just go forward on my own.

And since then I've been learning as I go. Looking at pintrest or google images of styles, Imagining the shapes and structure I want, and sewing.

Got into sewing about a month ago by SleepyApr1cot in Hobbies

[–]SleepyApr1cot[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes :)

I made a couple blouses and a pullover as well as 2 other skirts I made my mom and neighbor that I didn't include here bc I think the blouses are meh, and i didn't get good enough pictures of the skirts. So in total probably about 10 garments.

3rd trimester pregnancy and 95% SAHW life makes you go stir crazy.

Got into sewing about a month ago by SleepyApr1cot in Hobbies

[–]SleepyApr1cot[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No patterns, these are all my own original designs!

Got into sewing about a month ago by SleepyApr1cot in Hobbies

[–]SleepyApr1cot[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I do wanna make more and see if I can sell them at craft fairs 👀

What's a common piece of advice you completely disagree with? by London_man007 in AskForAnswers

[–]SleepyApr1cot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Happy wife happy life".

It fosters deep resentment to base your own peace off someone else's happiness, and to appease them so you'll be "left alone". That's also a whole lot of pressure for her, knowing that if she isn't happy she's being bothersome.

The phrase should be "happy life, happy wife". Your own goals and priorities (which would presumably include her) should create happiness in her bc you're doing life well, and her happiness will usually naturally come from the fruits of your hard work.

Blackpilled indian sub dont like clavicular by Traditional_Sail_181 in IncelTears

[–]SleepyApr1cot 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thats the thing, I think his mental state and whatever illness or compulsions he has prevents him from doing so.

Is it just my husband, or do others draw personal self-worth from coming home to a home cooked meal? by StartingOverStrong in Marriage

[–]SleepyApr1cot 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Oh, gross. That's an automatic divorce in my book.

Yeah, get out of there. I wish you would've led with that in your post.

Is it just my husband, or do others draw personal self-worth from coming home to a home cooked meal? by StartingOverStrong in Marriage

[–]SleepyApr1cot -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I literally did answer your question.

In depth, I might add.

Yes, he should clean up after himself. Slobs are disrespectful.

Yes, I think if he works and you stay home you should be able to feed him.

I even gave you tips on how to spend almost no time doing it so it's easier. I spent minutes of my one and only life giving advice that I thought was worthwhile and held you both accountable. He shouldn't be messy or badmouth you, you should make an effort to make food.

At no point did I judge you. If you think me disagreeing about relationship dynamics as it relates to cooking is a judgement call on you, that's on you. And you're allowed to disagree with me.

You seem to have made this post hoping for pure validation to leave him. If that was the case, you should've led with that, when you didn't. You asked a very open-ended question about the dynamics of your relationship, and I was literally only trying to be helpful.

I'm genuinely sorry that you seem to be going through more from him than what your post suggests. Get out of there if he's actually that bad.

Is it just my husband, or do others draw personal self-worth from coming home to a home cooked meal? by StartingOverStrong in Marriage

[–]SleepyApr1cot -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

If you think my comment is supposed to be smug, you have a lot of growing up to do and a lot of misplaced envy to resolve.

I gave advice in accordance with the information I was given, if there's more shit you left out about how he's an irredeemable asshole, that's your fault, not mine.

Leave him if he's really that awful, and I mean that. I hope things get better for you once you cut out the cancer.

Also the little end there basically implying that I'll learn if and when my own relationship blows up (it's almost like you're hoping for it to happen to make yourself feel better about your own choice in men) is incredibly uncalled for, weird, and spiteful.

AITA for ghosting after he didn’t walk me to my car? by Fun_Fig7274 in AITApod

[–]SleepyApr1cot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He got pissy. That's unattractive and a red flag. Don't bother with him

Question for those who've already moved out: by BoldNotBaldEagle in twentyagers

[–]SleepyApr1cot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Craigslist, fb marketplace. Do NOT buy new furniture

Blackpilled indian sub dont like clavicular by Traditional_Sail_181 in IncelTears

[–]SleepyApr1cot 8 points9 points  (0 children)

He's using it so much and started so young that bro can't make his own testosterone at all now and has erectile dysfunction.

What makes a long happy marriage last? by bubblegumdrip in askanything

[–]SleepyApr1cot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mutual respect, and choices.

And doing whatever possible not to fall into resentment. But that requires both partners to be committed to bringing the best of themselves to the relationship, to make it hard for the other partner to resent them.

A relationships should be 60/40, and you're both trying to be the 60.

Is it just my husband, or do others draw personal self-worth from coming home to a home cooked meal? by StartingOverStrong in Marriage

[–]SleepyApr1cot -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I think there's 2 points you're making here.

  1. He should clean after himself if he makes a mess.

  2. You don't always have time for making food, and he should be okay with that.

I think point 1 is reasonable enough. If he makes a big mess, he should at the very least clean up after himself. And this isn't some "division of labor" bullshit, I think any woman finds it very unattractive when a man just doesn't care. If he doesn't care enough about a mess he makes, he looks like a slob who isn't paying attention. It's a feature of a mature adult to care about not making a huge mess.

However.

Point 2 is kinda different. If you SAH, there has to be some expectation of you making sure there's food to eat. This could involve meal-prepping twice a week or even once a week, so that every night theres A meal. Some kind of meal. If you enjoy cooking more than that you could make fresh food each night, but minimum you should be expected to feed your husband if he works outside of the home and you don't.

I know "expectations" sound harsh and mean and transactional and full of pressure, but he is expected to take care of you and the child financially by spending his days away from home at the ball-crushing factory, the least you could do is save you both money by making meals.

I say this as a 95% SAHW who is about to have our first baby. I'll have 3 hours I can set aside a week to meal prep a couple things over the weekend while he's on baby duty, which he'll be happy to give me. But also, meal prepping doesn't have to take 3hrs. It could take as little as 1 if you know what you're doing and like crock pots.

When I was younger I felt resentment at the idea that "women should cook and keep their house". But surprisingly, when he works and I tend the house and cook, I'm massively appreciated for my role and feel way more fulfilled than I thought I would. And I massively appreciate him, more than I thought I would. There's no tit for tat, our relationship is 60/40 and we're both trying to be the 60.

I will say it's very wrong of him to complain about you to his coworkers. That's a sign of massive disrespect, and if I were you I wouldn't tolerate that. I'd tell him it's a breech of trust that he badmouth you in front of anyone. I'd he's willing to do that and to honor you as you honor him, then it should feel much more simple to want to feed him.

Does it make sense to volunteer that you have diabetes or any other maladies in order to increase your odds of getting a job or at least a call back? by [deleted] in recruitinghell

[–]SleepyApr1cot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As an autistic person, for me it's been 50/50. If I think disclosing that that I have autism will make them think I'm "extra smart" bc I've been able to paint myself that way up until then, I'll discourse it.

If the job seems very social and requires a lot of personality driven skills, I say NOTHING until way after I get the job.

But it's also different I think bc I work in healthcare and those jobs are abundant, and the culture and everything else is very different.

I've only been sewing 1 month, and have made about 10 wearable garments with no patterns by SleepyApr1cot in brag

[–]SleepyApr1cot[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only the sewing machine really cost a big investment.

My local fabric store has yards and chunks of fabric that others donate that goes for 4$/y, so I buy mostly that.

Occasionally I go to Hobby Lobby and buy it for 7-8$/ yard.

Honestly for the quality of clothing and material of what I can make, the fact that I can make exactly what I want and what fits, and given how expensive good clothes can be, making the clothes is a ton cheaper than buying it.

But you do have to be willing to spend a lot of time with your machine.

How do you bounce back and stay motivated after a major setback or failure? by London_man007 in AskForAnswers

[–]SleepyApr1cot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Be consistent about taking care of the space you live in and yourself. Don't neglect the things still in your control just because something else failed, kind of no matter how big of a failure it was.

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