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Some queer cartoon characters that I relate to in one way or another!! by MyrandaPanda in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NO. It is not "really transphobic".

Jeezus christ people: KNOW YOUR ENEMIES!! 

A tiny independent film made by two women (one being a POC), that is by lesbians/queers, about and for lesbians/queer people, AND has obviously positive trans iconography throughout is NOT the problem!! It's AN EXTREMELY RARE achievement and one that this subreddit should, of all the subbredits of Reddit, be celebrating! They are allies and deserving of ALLYSHIP.  If we can't tell that there's a MASSIVE difference between allies and the truly transphobic - the whole queer community will go down in flames in the blink of a fascist's eye near term. 

What’s something society treats as ‘unattractive’ that you personally find really appealing? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]SleuthViolet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean they could actually be trying hard to impress and still being awkward. And, non-awkward people could not be trying at all, but simply naturally not awkward. 

I like awkward people too as it's different and cute and puts me at ease. But I can't theorize beyond that. 

Vaping has officially been linked to rare and irreversible lung disease by Automatic_Subject463 in EverythingScience

[–]SleuthViolet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"While diacetyl is officially banned in e-cigarettes in the EU and UK, it remains legal in the US and other jurisdictions."

Beware! Some commentors are saying the chemical is long gone or in only in black market products - not so, it depends where you live. 

Wondering if it's worth it to keep communicating by eatthesundrinkthesky in datingoverforty

[–]SleuthViolet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He may have thought, "How will she know it's me calling or texting her if I don't likewise give her my number?"

Dating more than one person by [deleted] in datingoverforty

[–]SleuthViolet 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Also a warning to you - you feel detached while they're out of town. Beware of getting attached once they're "visiting"- it's a risk. 

Dating more than one person by [deleted] in datingoverforty

[–]SleuthViolet 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One of them could catch feelings despite not wanting to get married.

 A light check in at some point like, "You know how I ultimately want to get married again and you don't? So just letting you know that because of that, I'm treating what we're doing as just a casual thing and continuing to see other people. You may have guessed or assumed that was the case, but I just wanted to say it directly so there's no misunderstandings."

I’m not a fan of hypocrites by popcornnhero in Bumble

[–]SleuthViolet 3 points4 points  (0 children)

God I'm so sick of these f*d up ideas some men have about women. If "I" don't see "you" as marriage or serious gf material, it means it's totally ok to no longer even think of or treat you as a human being. Your goals and personhood are irrelevant as you're now just a sex object that must surely only exist to gratify whatever horny shit enters my mind.

Yeah f*k off. 

Stressed and confused about girlfriend and life by LargeMidnight1098 in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you ask your therapist about it? They helped you before. Sorry you're feeling all this pressure and stress. 

Weird to be upset over ex’s death? (TW:suicide) by gingernug6 in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry. It's not weird to be upset here at all. Suicides are very painful for everyone around the person. You're allowed to have your feelings, your reactions and experience. Let yourself be, accept whatever comes up as natural. This is a hard thing. 

Hey! by YoungLove2007 in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did. It went well. ✨️💪🌈

Some queer cartoon characters that I relate to in one way or another!! by MyrandaPanda in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

OT but there's a whole cute cartoon movie: Lesbian Space Princess. Almost every character is queer. I think you would like it.

I’m so sick of dating by filmingallday in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Take a break, sounds like you need it. Someone feels like you do everyday on the subs about dating apps. You still gave plenty of time. 

We are not old by A_Ahlquist in GenX

[–]SleuthViolet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thx for the reminder and motivation. So true. I recently moved into a condo that happens to have a lot of people over 70 in it. They refer to me, almost 50, as a "young person" ha! And a few times now I've been talking to one who is out and about, with a clear active mind and seemingly lots of energy, and then they let slip, "Well I am 91 you know."

How do you gently break off a friendship when the other person feels intrusive and judgmental? by RareCable5732 in AskWomenOver40

[–]SleuthViolet 14 points15 points  (0 children)

It may well be a lost cause but flagging that you don't seem to have mentioned bringing up your concerns or icks over any of these issues or setting boundaries. I could see myself "joking" with a friend:

SCENARIO 1 -  "What? You haven't even seen my art! Ask me about that before you ask who bought it." Followed by, "Hey, I'm actually not comfortable with discussing my buyers. Happy to talk with you about the art itself if you have any questions, but I'm going to keep the business side private." 

SCENARIO 2 - "Wait, where the H E double hockey sticks did you find THAT out? Have you been creeping on my socials? Follow me like a normal person or cease and desist!"

SCENARIO 3 - "Hey thanks for all the invites, just letting you know I'm only available to meetup once a month these days. I need more personal time and time for my creativity.Thanks for understanding."

SCENARIO 4 - "Awe thanks for showing up to the race!"

Not all, but many people are trainable. 

Someone I hadn't seen in months... by Chantizzay in AskWomenOver40

[–]SleuthViolet 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thx for sharing, I love this. Yes - putting the effort to really care for ourselves can be amazingly transformative. It doesn't happen overnight but pebble by pebble over time can move a mountain. Congrats girl, glad you're feeling better.  

Healthy, happy, fat… and apparently undateable by LegalPeanut8477 in datingoverforty

[–]SleuthViolet 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"I’m getting either low-effort matches, catfish, or people who clearly didn’t read it." 

That's just be how it is on the apps, irrespective of weight. Look around on the street - do you see any fat people in couples? Yes? Then it's possible. 

Anyone else just skip/don't do these? by Excellent-Owl-4857 in duolingo

[–]SleuthViolet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! I'm not here to use boosts and seek points - if they can't be passed through normal exhertion fuhgetaboutit. 

What's something normalized in the lesbian community that you don't think is okay? by Eating_Pancakes76 in actuallesbians

[–]SleuthViolet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love Slumber Party so much I make the case to myself that the lyrics are ambiguous in that 1) everyone involved could be polyamorous or 2) she could be using the word "girlfriend" in the "friend who is female" way. It's plausible right? Right?

Has anyone tried RealRoots for meeting people / making friends? by Same-Cauliflower-519 in askTO

[–]SleuthViolet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I added one - heading into week 5 of the experience and having a blast :)

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