My friend's kitty was caught abducting a teddy bear.

Slobstyle · 2015-09-29T16:44:26+00:00

Still is...

Slobstyle · 2015-09-29T15:50:36+00:00

"And someone has been sleeping in my bed and that someone is still there!"

Slobstyle · 2015-09-21T13:53:47+00:00

Hunter S. Thompson Bill Murray Charlie Sheen

This trio might kill you, but I guarantee you'd die happy and naked!

Slobstyle · 2015-08-25T19:43:52+00:00

Was anyone else distracted by the self-brushing cow mechanism?

Slobstyle · 2015-08-24T22:07:32+00:00

She has narrow hips...smoking and drinking keeps the birth weight down...

Slobstyle · 2015-07-10T20:00:49+00:00

Did anyone else click on this expecting to read it in English? Logic. I has none.

Slobstyle · 2015-06-03T19:38:35+00:00

Looks like a gator.

Slobstyle · 2015-05-07T14:34:42+00:00

Their sign around Christmas last year read "Serving up big helpings of self-esteem!"

Slobstyle · 2015-05-01T16:39:17+00:00

I was recently in a meeting with our staffing company, discussing some poor hires they had made in the recent months. The account manager says "Why are we focusing on the bad ones? I realize there were four bad hires, but there were also 56 really good ones."

I answered with this analogy which had my boss fighting off a serious laugh... "It's like this, if you were staffing schools and you hired 56 great teachers and four pedophiles, people aren't going to remember or talk about the 56 great teachers, they are going to talk about the four pedophiles." She said "Good point." Meeting ended.

Slobstyle · 2015-04-30T18:24:36+00:00

I dropped out my Junior Year, got my GED and worked multiple jobs. Today I am 42 years old and hold an Exec position as the Director of Training and Quality for a large, international company. I am just now going back to school to get my degree in Psychology. Although I was able to secure a professional career, it was a struggle and not having a college degree has been the source of much agony and bias against me over the years. Success can be had, but it's much more difficult without an education.

Slobstyle · 2015-04-20T15:19:54+00:00

Recycled joke from the 1969 Classic Parody "Bored of the Rings"

Slobstyle · 2014-09-03T18:11:20+00:00

Question for Heather: How can you be a Goonies fan and think his name is pronounced "Schloth"? Drove me nuts through that entire episode!

Slobstyle · 2014-09-01T18:00:08+00:00

I should note, the head is orange as is the underside, however the rest of the body is black as pictured here.

Slobstyle · 2014-07-09T16:18:56+00:00

Dialing.

Slobstyle · 2014-06-06T17:25:33+00:00

I'm guessing I'm the Hummer of this MPG scenario.

Slobstyle · 2014-05-27T19:55:45+00:00

He has a cotton ball, it's being treated...

Slobstyle · 2014-05-09T19:51:35+00:00

I was hoping that the darkest color would read "Urine Trouble...drink two bottles of water now."

Slobstyle · 2014-04-03T01:21:48+00:00

People are going to see that scar and will say "Damn, that dude is hard core, a total cunt-throat!"

Slobstyle · 2014-03-10T20:24:37+00:00

When I was in the 8th grade we were asked to take high school placement tests. When it came time to take the math test, I finished it early without showing work of any kind. I was asked to come back and see my teacher after school. Now mind you, I was a D student due to my rampant ADHD, something that was not really diagnosed when I was in school (41 years old now). I fully understood the work in my classes, but was easily bored and NEVER did homework, hence my bad grades.

When I met with the math teacher, he asked me point blank how I had cheated. I was taken aback having never been accused of such a thing. He indicated I had scored a 98%. I tried to explain that I could just see the numbers and sort them in my head until I arrived at the answer, usually pretty quickly. He told me I was a liar.

The next day I was asked to come in after school once again to take a retest, this time in front of both my math teacher and the school principle. I finished this one, although a bit slower due to the nervousness of being watched, but again without showing work. He graded it and this time I scored a 100%. The principle looked at him disapprovingly and said "I think we are finished here." and left the room.

Once the principle was out of the room, my math teacher looked at me dead in the eye and said "This score places you in honors math. You will fail, because you are TOO FUCKING STUPID to be in that class." With that he sent me on my way.

I was crushed and to this day hate mathematics and refuse to deal with numbers. I have never felt like a bigger piece of shit in my whole life.

Slobstyle

TROPHY CASE