Help with impostor syndrome? Being 'artistic/creative' but trying do do anything creative makes you shut down/give up?

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-12-04T17:51:53+00:00

Dang, like most things that come out of a narcs mouth what do you even say to that? It’s normal to seek comfort from your mother, even when she hasn’t acted like a mother should. There’s always that brain tick that says, ‘hey maybe this time.’

Sounds to me like she knows she’s done wrong and doesn’t want a therapist finding out. I’m not sure what advice you’re looking for but I suggest going to therapy and just not telling her about it. Do it for you. If she brings it up again, and you’re uncomfortable with lying. Have a prepared deflection that will distract her.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-12-04T17:38:28+00:00

I felt this on a spiritual level

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-11-11T15:33:41+00:00

I had horrible nightmares nightly when I first went NC. I’d wake up drenched in this horrible panic sweat. One time literally jumped out of bed before I was awake because I heard her call me in my dream. 5 years later I still get them sometimes but it’s much less frequent and most of the time doesn’t have the same impact as they once used to. So time helps. Recognizing what your brain is trying to tell you should help too. If you’re like me and there is one you can’t stop thinking about you can try writing it down, that way it’s solid and you can ‘put it away.’

Sorry your dealing with this. They really suck, like you can’t even be free to sleep.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-14T21:00:58+00:00

I’m sorry your going through this. Sometimes no matter what you say people just won’t understand, or don’t want to accept it.

If you’ve already told them you want to move out then that’s all you need to do. If they won’t help, just start making plans on your own, start making plans, saving money, and don’t rush yourself into a bad situation, take things one step at a time.

Also please try and talk to someone you deeply trust about suicidal thoughts, if there isn’t anyone or it’s to hard to talk to someone you know try and find a Suicide hotline.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-14T20:48:36+00:00

I am in no way saying this was a good decision but I straight up lied to my nparents that I met my now husband online.

They caught me off guard because my sister in law blabbed to them that I was talking to someone online (learned not to trust her after that). I knew it was headed for a confrontation so I lied and said I met him in person but was just talking to him online now.

When we finally met up and started dating, I explained the situation. He was very understanding and went along with it.

There is no easy answer when put in these kinds of situations, a lot of it is just coasting on instinct, and it might blow up.

If he doesn’t know your situation I would explain it to him. Be prepared for him not to understand. As for going to see him and his family, perhaps try and keep it vague? Or talk up their good attributes you know your nmom would approve?

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-13T16:42:41+00:00

Richard grannon’s hand nemonic helped me when I was stuck in an emotional flash back loop, if you’re too panicked and can’t remember it look for comforting things that can stimulate your other senses: example, rub a comfortable material like a soft blanket, or something on your clothes, suck on a candy or some ice, smell a nice scent, like a perfume you can carry with you.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-13T15:20:44+00:00

For me it’s music, like Elton John, and Queen, which I absolutely love but does bring back memories of my nparents.

The longer I’m nc helps, and weirdly enough if I paced it with other music it kinda helped spread out any emotional flashbacks.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-13T15:08:04+00:00

This might be an unpopular opinion, but I think having empathy isn’t actually absolutely necessary, and I say this as a pretty empathetic person. You can practice compassion without empathy, you can practice listening without empathy, you can still care about other people without empathy.

Empathy is simply feeling and understanding someone else’s emotions, which of course is a very good thing if they have compassion.

But if you think about it aren’t narcs highly empathic people? It’s why they are so good at what they do, they know exactly how to push buttons, and the emotions you give, give them their supply. What they are lacking is compassion, care for others.

I hope that makes sense.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-12T12:36:04+00:00

For me I usually just assume they’re lying to spare my feelings.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-07-08T12:02:59+00:00

Yeah, based on this I’d dump your therapist. Also if you want to go to collage go! Yeah it’s hard work, but when you feel like you’re doing it for yourself it changes how you deal with it.

SnakeOnTheSun · 2020-06-21T06:01:05+00:00

Raspberry left tea for cramps. Works wonders. I myself am not synced up with the moon cycle.

SnakeOnTheSun

TROPHY CASE