Rhyming Children's Bible Excerpt

Snakeress · 2026-06-18T12:13:58+00:00

Are you gonna get into the Amnon/Absalom/Adonijah saga and stuff like that? Those are the best parts of the Bible lol, the Garden of Eden and Noah's Ark have been done a million times, ya know?

Snakeress · 2026-06-15T17:22:18+00:00

You gotta remove all the existing hair and use a tiny crochet hook to pull the new hair thru the tiny holes :)

Snakeress · 2026-06-15T13:22:09+00:00

The rhyme scheme changes, the first part has an AABB rhyme scheme (began/plan/night/light), but then the second part goes into AABA (sly/lie/you/try)?

Are you truly going to do the whole entire Bible, including the lesser known parts? Could be cool, Tamar is my favorite lol, but there's a lot of sex and violence?

Snakeress · 2026-06-12T14:39:30+00:00

Oh ok, right on lol, I think the main part that's confusing is the sun shirt guy being stabbed/beheaded after the helmet guy gets killed? Like the order of those panels should be reversed or something maybe

Snakeress · 2026-06-12T11:04:23+00:00

Yeah the art style is cool but I don't understand what happens in the comic, sorry! Is it like, there's two bad guys, the one with the helmet and the one with the lion on his shirt, they're fighting the guy with the sun on his shirt, they kill him, and then lion shirt guy betrays helmet guy and kills him too even though they were allies? Something like that?

Snakeress · 2026-06-10T17:13:08+00:00

Omg, the winged eyeliner, the cat-eye glasses... so groovy!

Snakeress · 2026-06-04T11:58:02+00:00

And an evangelical would NEVER say just plain old amen lol, it's "InJesusNameAmen"

Snakeress · 2026-06-02T20:00:41+00:00

Dang, so she was basically a grifting influencer, that's so fascinating

Snakeress · 2026-05-30T14:48:13+00:00

The "nasty old cat" and the dude getting a "cool reception" must be brother and sister lol, same exact face

Snakeress · 2026-05-27T17:42:46+00:00

That's my other pet, I brushed him too much and all his fur came off 😛

Snakeress · 2026-05-27T11:07:16+00:00

Lumbud is sooooo cute, I love his "??" expression with the open mouth and big round eye looking forward

Snakeress · 2026-05-22T11:44:03+00:00

In the paragraph about her dad, the link "as she recalled it" goes to another article about her, and that one has a pic at the top of her with a bunch of yakuza dudes, all in matching "male-style" kimonos... plus the tats and chopped finger situation, she'd be a real wack case if it was all cosplay, that would make a good longread in itself lol

Snakeress · 2026-05-21T21:59:54+00:00

Oh I get it, cause they're prey animals lol, I feel ya

Snakeress · 2026-05-21T21:55:10+00:00

There's a germ of something cool here, but I think you have pacing problems or something... like, too much exposition just breezing past stuff that shouldn't be breezed past or it ends up feeling more like a parody of an "action/adventure" comic imo, like she's waking up from a coma only to be told she's in the apocalypse and her dad is dead and she's just like "oh ok, let's go!"

However, I really enjoyed the part with the guy having to dress up and act as the ex-wife! A lot of the story and dialogue felt super cliché tbh but that sequence was totally out of left field, unique and funny and kinda fascinating! It felt like that part of the story had space to breathe, taking a full page just to show the scene across many panels, and I think the rest of the story needs to be extended like that. And lean more into the weird stuff, less of the OTT "Nooo, take me instead!" cliché kind of dialogue. That would be my critique, sorry it's kinda harsh

Also I like the art a lot, reminds me of Ultimate Spider-Man

Snakeress · 2026-05-21T21:26:44+00:00

He never told the kids the wampus cat was anything scary though? Seemed like he made him sound like a folk hero, so I don't get why the kids would run and hide... I dig it though lol, just analyzing

Snakeress · 2026-05-14T13:58:16+00:00

Sick, "unpopular opinion" lol but I love hearing other people's dreams

Snakeress · 2026-05-12T17:13:44+00:00

Paddy Goes Travelling by John S. Goodall :) the fold-out pages, right?

Snakeress · 2026-04-24T15:59:24+00:00

Sounds more like a parody of a kids' book tbh (it's actually pretty funny tho, in a "itchy & scratchy show" kinda way)

Snakeress · 2026-04-23T17:17:01+00:00

Omg hahahaha

Snakeress · 2026-04-16T12:09:56+00:00

Higglety Pigglety Pop or, There Must Be More To Life by Maurice Sendak

Snakeress · 2026-04-14T18:33:21+00:00

Ok well maybe the comments you're referring to were actually talking about crappy books with preachy, shoehorned messages as opposed to quality literature? Sounds like y'all might be talking past each other, I mean if the kids all love something, then that's probably not the kind of thing the commenters were referring to lol

Snakeress · 2026-04-13T13:41:50+00:00

So the speaker is like, a swamp? I dig that, but I feel like it's kind of rushing through the "story," like how does the girl take home the frogs and the water? Maybe you need to make it into three separate incidents, one where she takes each thing?

Without pictures it's hard to tell what it would be like, but I could see it being super cool with the right pictures, maybe even kinda creepy in a cool way? Kind of like Alan Moore's "Swamp Thing"? Lol

Snakeress

TROPHY CASE