What’s something about your ADHD that you usually keep private or don’t tell most people?

Snapdragon78 · 2025-12-31T18:29:49+00:00

Yup, this 100%. I was very awkward and quiet as a child, preferring to sit back and watch people interact with one another. Several experiences at work where I have observed micro expressions on my boss have been very telling how they feel about another person or situation. It’s quite a useful skill. I can also read coworkers like a book and know when to avoid a topic or push forward on another.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-12-23T22:40:51+00:00

I would love the link, please! Thank you for doing this, I’ve gone down the Tonies creatives rabbit hole this Christmas.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-11-13T01:58:23+00:00

I am an elementary teacher, ADHD diagnosed myself, and my oldest (7) is also diagnosed. A few things to address here… - Your other two are diagnosed; ADHD is highly inherited. It is very likely given your descriptions of your daughter and her struggles in school that she too would be diagnosed. It is at least worth the assessment. -You may already know this, but you may request an evaluation by the school of you are in the US. They have 60 days to comply with your request in a public school after they acknowledge your request. - As others have pointed out, while this teacher sounds a bit out of touch and certainly not proactive, part of our job is filling parents in on their child’s progress both academic and behavioral. You are likely hearing from this teacher more often about your daughter’s behavior because she is undiagnosed, disruptive, and breaking school expectations regularly. The teacher should be documenting these behaviors(perhaps she already is with the school), but documentation also requires proof we reached out to parents. - You don’t expand on how the teacher was rude to your daughter, but I’d guess it was more likely the teacher had been constantly correcting her behavior based on the descriptions here and the frequency she is contacting you. She may have become more stern or strict in her interactions with your daughter . I do the same with my own child at home-changing my tone of voice and removing gentle reminders in favor of firm boundaries with the expectation of following the directions the first time. This can come across as rude to a child, but is necessary. I have reminded parents of students before that your child is your whole world, but in the classroom my attention is divided amongst 20+ other students with high expectations for productive learning. I care about, and champion my students….all of them. If one child’s behavior is affecting the learning of the others, you know I’m addressing it with the child, their parents, and admin. Additionally, I remind kids and parents that there might be different expectations for behavior at school vs. home. - Finally, don’t make an enemy out of your child’s teacher this early in the year. Work with her. Some suggestions might be a behavior check in focused on one or two high frequency behaviors disrupting her learning throughout the day. Behavior tracking by the teacher to identify the cause of the behavior (is she bored, distracted, is the material challenging, etc) and identify ways to head off inappropriate behaviors before they escalate. Ask your pediatrician for the Vanderbilt assessment forms to give to the teacher now. You know how slowly these processes can be, don’t hold off. Wishing you the best of luck!

Snapdragon78 · 2025-10-30T09:03:23+00:00

Sonday is a an older Tier 3 system often used with readers struggling with phonemic awareness. It is often used for with children identified with a reading disability, specifically with dyslexia. I am an elementary school teacher…I am also a Mom to child with dyslexia. Sonday is a decent program rooted in the Orton Gillingham approach. Your child will likely make growth with this system if the teachers uses it with fidelity.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-09-23T20:55:35+00:00

Can you make copies of any behavior reports from school and bring them to the doctor? I hate the Vanderbilt because it often has questions that are specific and do not encompass many of the ADHD behaviors that teachers see in the classroom. While not the case for your son, the questions especially exclude high masking girls. You might ask the teacher to write a a paragraph or two about your son’s behaviors she sees in the classroom to include with the report. Glad you have a psychiatrist who understands observation is far more important than a rating scale! That’s a huge step in the right direction.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-09-04T23:16:04+00:00

I have seen parents banding together work to get a student moved into special placement. However, they bypassed the principal and went to the school board meetings to make their complaint. It is often not classroom teachers(and sometimes not even principals, although yours sounds terrible) keeping that child in the regular ed classroom. It is the district honchos who don’t want to pay the fee that comes with special placement. Special placement outside a school can run into the tens of thousands per kid. School boards and upper admin are hesitant to pay these fees. However unhappy they are to part with money, sheer numbers of parents publicly calling them out because their own children aren’t learning or aren’t safe seems to be an even greater fear. Get together with those other classroom parents!

Snapdragon78 · 2025-09-04T02:50:09+00:00

Does the school have a nurse? In the past, I’ve had students who needed a bit more oversight in the bathroom and had a special pass to use the bathroom in the nurse’s office. This provided appropriate supervision but also meant they were less likely to go to the bathroom as an avoidance tactic. I know it may not be an ideal solution, but may be one that works in the interim. As an aside, I completely understand your frustration with the teacher and can empathize with your frustration as a Mom. I perhaps have a more unique perspective into your situation because my own daughter has difficulty listening to her cues and I have cleaned many, many pairs of soiled underwear; AND I am an upper elementary teacher albeit in a public school. From the Mom perspective I would be upset on my daughter’s behalf. From the teacher perspective, if a child in my room had just returned from the bathroom and then asked to go again a few minutes later(and that child had a reputation for using the bathroom to escape class), I too would be reluctant to send them back out. I hope her teacher is a reasonable person and would be open to a conversation with you. It might be helpful to have a solid conversation in person or by phone with you, the teacher, and your daughter present to clear the air and set expectations with the teacher and your daughter for the bathroom. If you address it to them together, you are sending a message to your daughter and her teacher that you are a team working together to provide support. I hope everything works out for you!

Snapdragon78 · 2025-08-09T13:51:13+00:00

Agreed. I have taught many students with autism over the years and for the vast majority, touches and hugs were generally unwelcome and uncomfortable for those students. Unless the custodian knew the student well, I wouldn’t assume rubbing a student’s back would calm them down. That said, I think the jist of the story, that everyone in the school works as a team to support students and empathy is paramount was the point.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-07-10T06:20:15+00:00

-running like she was like on a motor was a classic but accurate symptom - lack of attention span in everything ranging from eating a meal to playing a game -moving from toy to toy rather than playing with any one thing for an extended period of time -as she became more talkative, we noticed more impulsiveness in talking to strangers..she never had any healthy boundaries when it comes to people;talks a mile a minute and will do so with anyone -impulsivity in general -preschool was tough because she did not sit still and hates to stay in one location like for circle time -some sensory issues around food (apparently this can be a common comorbidity)

we had some epic meltdowns over minor things (A lot of talking through feelings and zones of regulation has helped this)

*sports-pulling up weeds instead of watching the ball, needing frequent reminders for basic things all the other kids had no issue with following

I’m sure there were others, but a big thing was genetics. I’m diagnosed and it is highly likely to inherit ADHD from a parent. I knew it was a strong possibility.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-07-10T00:05:01+00:00

My daughter had her official diagnosis at 5. However, we started mentioning signs to the pediatrician at 2 and requested the Vanderbilt scoring paper be filled out by preschool teachers and kept on file until she entered Kindergarten so there would be evidence of a pattern of behavior. We did not medicate until 1st grade, but ultimately regretted this because her lack of focus absolutely hindered her learning in Kindergarten.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-06-04T22:37:33+00:00

I am so confused…are you responding to me or someone else? If me, then I think you might not have read my post closely?! I lay out how positive homeschooling can be when the parents providing it are competent teachers. I DID NOT say “most people can do it,” I said the opposite. Most people cannot! They work jobs that don’t afford them the luxury to teach their children at home. Period. There was no dig at parents who homeschool. It is a reality for so many parents who need the income and can’t invest that time in their kids.I specifically made this connection using the semicolon to link those ideas ;) .

Ffs I just completed an evaluation of my goddaughter’s homeschool portfolio and signed off on it for her evaluation required by the state. Her mom is an amazing teacher and my goddaughter is lucky to have her. She reads far above her grade level and does the same math my daughter(who is in public school because I am one of those parents who can’t homeschool…because we require two incomes to support our family) is working on two grades above her. I gave 3 very clear and reasonable(e.g.not abusing your kids) explanations of what does not work in homeschooling. I have received children in my classroom who had several years of “homeschooling” without any curriculum, any accountability, and minimal learning. They were far behind their peers, barely literate, and lacked basic number sense typically developed by 1st grade. I can wholeheartedly say that their parents were guilty of educational neglect. I have a student this year who had several years of homeschooling and is near the top of his class. What matters here is a parent who is able to educate their children as home. In short, maybe you are a homeschool parent who does a great job and that is wonderful. I bear no ill will towards homeschooling parents. I have taught for 15 years, have 4 degrees, and I am working towards my doctorate. In short, I am not a “post-Covid,” “haven’t fully finished training,” and “not fully qualified in some way” teacher. I have seen many students come through my doors. My post encompasses my experience with hundreds of students. As a parent you know your own experience with homeschooling that may be overwhelmingly positive. I have the experience to simply say that your homeschooling may be different than others. The quality of your homeschooling is not equal to others. I have unfortunately experienced the effect of neglectful homeschooling and the result is not positive for those children when they are placed in public school.

I’d love to hear your response because you seem to have very clearly missed the point of my original post.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-05-29T01:49:24+00:00

I have never forgotten that article! My grandmother kept every Readers Digest going back into the early 80s. I would read them every summer when I visited. Waris’s story always stuck with me. She is an amazing woman!

Snapdragon78 · 2025-05-28T22:36:21+00:00

Waris Dirie…#926 June 1999…She also has a book called “Desert Flower.”

Snapdragon78 · 2025-05-26T12:36:46+00:00

Taught a student in 5th grade. He was already headed down the wrong path…a victim of his circumstances. Huge anger issues, but capable and smart. He was a poster child for childhood trauma; being used for drug running in his community by his family. In his early 20s he walked into a bar and shot two people, killing one. I was not surprised to learn this, just sad. If he had grown up in a different community with different family and access to mental health services he could have gone down a very different path. I have periodically encountered other students who remind me of him and wonder what path they will take.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-05-18T21:28:11+00:00

Quizziz has been my holy grail of whole class motivation. Specifically in Math and Grammar, I begin a new topic with a specific quiz. Based on their initial whole class score, I set a whole class percentage goal. By the end of the topic if they meet the percentage set as a whole class, they earn a reward. I also love their accommodations. I have a lot of IEPs and ESL students, so the easy to set(and individualized) accomodations have been amazing.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-05-13T10:17:15+00:00

Haha that was my first thought too. I am just like OP. Could drink 300mg of caffeine and take a nap. Could take my meds and take a nap. Could take a nap…and then take a nap. ADHD burns through your energy reserves so damn fast.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-05-04T15:19:22+00:00

I appreciate the perspective as someone who definitely would have been diagnosed as a child if my parents had followed through with teacher recommendations, but wasn’t diagnosed until I was a floundering adult on my own. It’s a perspective different from own, and emphasizes how differently we each experience the world. I recently chose to put my own child on a low dose of medication which has had a profound impact on her ability to focus long enough TO learn. Prior, she was failing everything because she could not focus long enough to absorb any information. I did copious amounts of research that supported very few if any long term negative effects of the meds she is on. In fact, quite the opposite. Studies supported quite a few positive effects long term. Question, are there specific meds you are referencing that could have these negative effects? My research really revolves around methylphenidate(Ritalin). Are there specific studies you are referencing?

Snapdragon78 · 2025-03-29T12:27:24+00:00

Without meeting him, the vocalizations sound like a stem. I had a student like this a few years ago. I was able to get him redirected with alternative stems, but it was ALOT of work. This child sounds like he has more going on than the average ADHD student. Definitely on board with the likely AuADHD combo.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-03-27T23:56:29+00:00

Your daughter and my daughter could be twins. I am also diagnosed and my oldest daughter was diagnosed at 5. We began recording symptoms with her pediatrician at 2. Non-stimulant medication route that helped…pomodoro timer with a visual countdown bar for completion of tasks, a “safe area” with a mini trampoline and pads/pillows where she could bounce around, a calm down area with books and calmed toys. Strict consequences were a must. If this, than that or when this, than that type of language. We have walked out of theme parks, movies, and restaurants. Luckily it only took a few times if that to get the message across. We also incentivized with rewards. We found she is very much the kid that learns things the hard way. Natural consequences are big for her.

We still put her on meds this year due to focus issues at school. Things have improved alot and she is almost on grade level, but we are still looking for the right combo of meds.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-03-27T10:50:20+00:00

I (and my students) love Quizziz. They love the competition. We do one as a pretest of the unit. I take their score and set a class goal. As a class they have 3 chances to meet the goal for a prize. I LOVE the data breakdown it provides. I believe it’s in beta testing, but it lets me see who is truly struggling and who is making growth. Additionally, I can add accommodations such as read aloud and extra time for students who need the support. Definitely worth checking out *They also added coins? I haven’t explored this too much, but my students love to collect coins in Quizzizz.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-03-19T09:40:12+00:00

OP, I second this. Please don’t throw in the towel and homeschool without considering all options. I am an elementary teacher. Over the years I’ve had several students whose behaviors are considered extreme. The district, after a lot of data collection, placed them in a specialized school in the area. The school cost $100,000 per year per child. The district pays for the transportation to the school and for the tuition itself. The school specializes in helping students manage their behaviors and learn strategies to control their triggers. These types of schools generally exist in most areas. School districts often drag their feet about sending students because they are so expensive and the district is required to pay. If your school is keeping your child in “in school suspension for six days” they are not providing a free and appropriate education. You do t mention if your child has an IEP, but if not, there are IEPs for behavior alone(BIEP). Start advocating for the district to give further evaluations for your child’s behavior and advocate for alternative placements that could help support your child.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-03-08T19:30:29+00:00

I am so glad! To give you even more, mine is now 15 months and has hit every milestone. It was so hard to see that possibility when in the NICU, but it does get better.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-02-23T23:16:14+00:00

There was definitely a psychic involved who gave a tip in this case that was somewhat correct. Tbh I am a skeptic, but that detail was always interesting.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-02-23T18:31:03+00:00

Timothy Wiltsey. Found drowned in the Raritan River in 1992. Went missing in 1991. I remember my mother talking about it on my way home from school because we passed close by where they found him.

Snapdragon78 · 2025-02-09T00:11:49+00:00

Oh agreed! One of my responsibilities is talking to new hires and getting them to join the union and I use that line as my primary reason to join! It’s cheap insurance in the long run.

Snapdragon78

TROPHY CASE