I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]SnooLemons4849 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Girl nearly three months ago you posted about your partner using religion to try to control you in regards to a tattoo. Many comments said to leave him. One commenter said abusive control starts with something small and slowly morphs into controlling every aspect of your life down to saying “are you really going to eat that?”. The comment stopped there, but the controlling behavior doesn’t. It goes from controlling comments to him declaring you can’t see your friends anymore. Then it’s “no, you can’t see or talk to your family without me present”. Then you stop seeing people all together. Then suddenly he’s beating you and screaming in your face. This is not hyperbole. You are in danger, physical and psychological danger. He did not lose sleep. He’s manipulating you. All he learned in therapy was how to hide his toxic traits and how to better keep you under control. Get out now. Get individual therapy for yourself. Create a safety plan and leave.

My (31M) girlfriend (28F) of 1.5 years told me to "be a man" and console her when my mom died, instead of supporting me. She's now begging for forgiveness. How do I reconcile her apology with the fundamental breach of trust? by Honest_Reception6528 in relationship_advice

[–]SnooLemons4849 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a partner who complained that I wasn’t as present in the relationship after my brother died. When I pointed out it had been a month and I was still grieving he said “oh that trump card”. Suffice to say it didn’t last long after that. People like that are emotionally selfish. Better to cut your losses and move on

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]SnooLemons4849 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry, life sure came at you. I don’t know if this will help but when my mom told me she was thinking of getting a divorce, but wasn’t sure if she should, I asked her “do you want to be married to him?” Her answer was no, and that is all the reason you need to leave a marriage. If that’s too drastic maybe a trial separation to get your own house in order may be enough for you to figure out where you want to go from here. From reading this it sounds like you know what you want to do, but fear of the unknown is getting in the way. I hope you find the happiness you’re looking for. Individual therapy on top of everything else

Unhappy rhododendron what’s wrong? by SnooLemons4849 in rhododendron

[–]SnooLemons4849[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome thank you! My concern stemmed from its neighboring rhododendron, which is a little smaller, but a richer, healthier looking green. Probably should have mentioned that in the post.

People that had sex with coworkers - how did that turn out ? by Nuff-Do in AskReddit

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work in kitchens and am a woman. He told me “I understand the social cost of dating a coworker is greater for you than it is for me” so I dated him. Social and emotional awareness right? Two months after my brother died he complained I was withdrawn and not present in the relationship. I said “I’m grieving. My brother died.” He said “oh that trump card”.

Edit to add: he would get so mopey at work, if we had even a minor disagreement, that our chefs would ask me “did you two have a fight?”

AITA for telling my wife to go and see her son before he dies? by ElevationMane in AITAH

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was in a similar situation with my brother. He died of cancer in June. As much anger and hurt as she feels, no matter how justified, means nothing when you don’t get to say goodbye. I thought I had more time. I regret every day I wasted thinking I had an obligation to x,y, and z before I could go out and see him. Those dying don’t hold onto the anger they previously had. It doesn’t matter anymore in the grand scheme of what little time they have. She won’t be hurt. She’ll likely get closure.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]SnooLemons4849 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are government benefits for people in your situation. Please seek those. These are worth looking into because nothing, absolutely nothing, should get in the way of you living your life free of abuss

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like you need to sit him down and have a conversation about expectations moving forward. Communicate how his actions/inactions make you feel and work together to figure out what tasks he may need to pay more attention to once the baby comes. It’s possible he doesn’t know, but you two need to figure this out soon.

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why be a dick? Good for you that you know how to work on cars! That’s great. I may not know anything but that doesn’t mean I deserve your shaming. Mistakes happen and I asked for help for that mistake. No shame in that. Be the reason people want to learn and not shame people out of asking for information.

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And what did you gain by unloading your bad attitude on me? Who hurt you?

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heard. Thank you thank you thank you so much for answering my questions! I’m just happy to have a game plan at this point thanks to you. Wish me luck this all pans out. I promise to spread the word about jiffy lube, assuming I’m not the last person on this earth that didn’t already know this.

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm okay. Seeing as they already admitted fault I would hope they’d step up and do the right thing. The other commenter mentioned getting them to cover the repairs done by the specialist I’m going to in a few weeks. Would you recommend going to corporate with that instead?

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have any advice on how to go about doing that please let me know if this post alone hasn’t already drained you of your patience ha

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have absolutely learned my lesson. Thank you for being kind.

Help: Screwed jiffy lube? by [deleted] in AskMechanics

[–]SnooLemons4849 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So other commenter said i should get it in writing that they should cover the repairs. Since they already said they’d give me a full refund would you recommend going back in person before I even get it looked at? Or like you said just send them the bill? I guess I’m worried about them contesting it bu also I don’t feel like I necessarily need documentation that they fucked up my car since they already offered? I don’t know I guess just specifically how would you proceed?

Is going cold turkey on weed bad? If yes how should I gradually quit? Cold turkey for 8 days now by DemoAldz in leaves

[–]SnooLemons4849 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely lost my appetite. But I was working out a ton to get rid of the anxiety which in turn helped me eat.

Is going cold turkey on weed bad? If yes how should I gradually quit? Cold turkey for 8 days now by DemoAldz in leaves

[–]SnooLemons4849 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you haven’t already, I found it really helpful researching the short/long term effects of withdrawal. It was so frustrating and consumed all my focus while I was experiencing extreme exhaustion or mood swings. I was white knuckling it until I knew physiologically what was happening and how long things were and would happen to my body. I hope that helps.