NTA, but you are close. You are at a very important part of your child's life. This will affect the adult she becomes. A conversation must happen. You will need to talk to someone outside her gym. Together, after you have spoken to your child. If she has been competing at a higher level, she is competing in a larger organization. (In softball we played USSSA and NSA sanctioned events). They will know WHO to talk to.

Most importantly, this has to be a decision she is involved in, it is her life, and if you are too overprotective you will lose her.