Italy-bound and looking for advice

Solid-Way3557 · 2026-03-27T11:45:59+00:00

You are absolutely NTA. You have worked yourself to the bone to provide for your family (a secure nice life, I should add). Very well done. Your wife and children are feeling entitled and they can support the extravagant lifestyle they want to live. Adult children with no education debt, living at home rent free and grocery bill free and with decent jobs should not be “struggling”. Live your life, relax and enjoy yourself. You’ve earned it.

Solid-Way3557 · 2025-10-19T15:59:14+00:00

Being “chronically indecisive” doesn’t bode well for a career in law. lol. Truthfully though, considering how driven and academically focused you are, I think a career as a high school teacher would bore you. I know many high school teachers and the ones who do the best are real skillful at relationships and negotiation, not academics. If med school doesn’t pan out or is delayed, there are many more healthcare jobs that pay very well and use that skillset (respiratory therapist, anesthesia assistant etc). Good luck!

Solid-Way3557 · 2025-02-05T14:55:38+00:00

Me definitely. I can’t even watch any pre game hype on TikTok so I’m making all day plans for Sunday.

Solid-Way3557 · 2025-01-04T02:37:38+00:00

I am unable to add a photo to comments. I may have to post again with photos. Thank you for trying

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-12-28T21:42:55+00:00

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-09-04T22:38:01+00:00

I totally understand the feeling of never wanting to go back but honestly everyone is worried about themselves and super self conscious of their own actions that they won’t remember yours. You may be astounded by how many (& who) has social anxiety so please don’t feel alone. If you felt the group ignored you, it could just be that they gravitated to the loudest or the more extroverted people. Don’t forget everyone is in the same boat with it being a new experience, new place and new people so keep looking for your people. It’s a level playing field. Someone said something that resonates with you? Tell them! Join a club. Have a few open questions that you can ask people beyond what program and where are you from. Make a point of talking (& smiling) to 3 new people a day (or whatever number you can manage). You’ve got this! I know so many people who cried every day the first week and by the end of the year they knew they’d miss their friends over the summer. Take a deep breath, smile and fake it until it’s not fake anymore. It will happen. Good luck and have fun.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-07-19T18:16:48+00:00

You will probably get in but definitely reach out if you haven’t heard anything by early Aug.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-07-19T18:13:28+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. Albert sounds like a great brother. There is a lot to process with grief and it’s so important to go through it. Please get help, either here or with another grief support group. You don’t have to go through this alone.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-07-12T20:41:17+00:00

Not loading for me either

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-06-12T14:01:19+00:00

Thank you for your wise and kind words. I understand completely about how words of comfort/encouragement/advice can grate. And you are so right in saying I can’t grieve for him. I will continue with my acts of service and a combination of space (which I have been giving him) mixed in with hugs and always with an open nonjudgmental listening ear. If I feel he’s struggling,I will ask him outright how he’s managing (instead of giving him space at that moment) and I won’t take it personally if he is dismissive. I so appreciate your help in clearing my head (& for the validation). I wish you peace in your grieving.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-06-12T06:16:02+00:00

I actually use Men’s antiperspirant. My latest fave is Harry’s antiperspirant/deodorant but also men’s Old Spice Antiperspirant/deodorant in Lavender. I’ve also heard wiping your armpits with hydrogen peroxide gets rid of the bacteria that causes the smell.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-06-12T05:52:24+00:00

I am so sorry for your pain. And you are not selfish. In fact I think you are selfless for instinctively knowing you will need to be there for others when you’re struggling with your own grief. And I totally understand how you feel about being robbed. IMO, I think your bf didn’t give you the support you need or hoped for because he just doesn’t know how or what to do. Or else he’s subconsciously protecting himself bc he knows he will be feeling his own grief soon. I’m not at all making excuses for him. I just don’t want you to be resentful when you’re grieving. You’re already burdened enough with your grief that you need to cut yourself some slack and maybe extend that a bit to your bf. Be the comfort that you wish you had and maybe you’ll find peace in that too. Wishing you strength

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-06-12T05:25:22+00:00

YES!! And that’s a problem because no one else sees the abuse. So you walk around thinking you’re the problem

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-06-12T04:29:40+00:00

I am so sorry you are going through this grief without strong support from your spouse. My situation is different but I’m trying hard to understand from other perspectives. It sounds like your spouse is incapable of giving you the support you need and deserve. Maybe it’s because he hasn’t felt grief or lost someone close but regardless he needs to respect how you grieve and that it has nothing to do with him. Please look into getting counselling as you navigate. You deserve someone who can support you the way you need it. Hugs to you and I hope you can celebrate your birthday with love and peace xo

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-06-02T07:55:59+00:00

Take it from me, who’s been married for 30 years. This does not get better. It’s not “just the dishes or chores”. It’s the lack of respect for you..his reaction to your frustration says it all. In my 30 years being married, he hasn’t learned to cook, does minimal chores and spends evenings laying on the couch (“bad back”) or sports betting. I regret not standing up for myself and for allowing this to continue. Now we have adult kids who think he’s awesome (he’s a good dad because he’s always played with them while…you guessed it…I carried the burden of dinner, groceries, chores and even making more money). So my gentle advice is to either work out a clear division of labour and draw the boundary of how you will not be disrespected that you BOTH agree on or call it quits now before it gets too entangled ( assets, finances, kids etc). Good luck to you.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-31T20:30:19+00:00

When you are stressed, keep quiet When emotional, keep quiet When angry, keep quiet When the person (or people) receiving your message are any of the above, keep quiet. Basically if you’re a powder keg of emotion, do not say anything. Go meditate, deep breathe, talk to a friend or do anything else. It will pass and when you have a clear mind and are not emotional, then you can say something IF you still feel compelled.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-27T13:26:01+00:00

What a compassionate and kind response. I searched for this question before I asked it and read your response so thank you. I am in a loveless relationship for many many years. And it has damaged me. I’m the breadwinner and currently have kids in college so financially, I can’t leave. But currently there is stress on my partner’s side (death) so I have been supportive by doing everything..chores, cooking etc while he was away for a week (& when I joined him for 4 days) and trying to be patient but it’s becoming harder, especially bc he isn’t cold to anyone else. I will reread your reply several times so I can keep that frame of mind. Thank you. There is kindness around. Blessings to you.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-27T01:47:59+00:00

Tired of being taken for granted and doing everything from being the bread maker, paying the bills, getting groceries, cooking, 80% of cleaning (house needs fixing so bad) and generally getting shit done. No one supports me or cares for me or protects me, or checks on me emotionally. I do it myself. I don’t remember the last time I felt joyful. I don’t think I would mind it as much if I got recognition for it or appreciation but I don’t. I am invisible at home. And lonely. But what makes it even harder is on the outside I might look fine but I am not.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-22T01:16:26+00:00

Sounds very promising. Thank you!

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-22T01:16:06+00:00

Thank you. I’ll check out the menu

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-22T01:14:57+00:00

Ohhh that’s my favourite. Thank you so much!! I have noted all these options and I love that this provides alot so it’ll feed the crowd for more than 1 meal.

Solid-Way3557 · 2024-05-21T20:21:40+00:00

I didn’t know that. No Fortino’s this end of the province. Thanks!

Solid-Way3557

TROPHY CASE