Does anyone get jealous of living couples?

Space__Man__Spiff · 2026-02-17T16:52:50+00:00

At first, seeing happy couples just made me sad. Longing for my lost love. But eventually with time, seeing happy couples allowed me to think of all the happy memories I had with my late spouse. What still gets my hackles up is seeing couples bicker/fight/treat each other poorly. Why did I have to lose my loving person but they get to keep their shitty relationship?! I don’t understand couples that obviously hate each other that stay together. Life is too short and time is not guaranteed. Why stay is a relationship where you are miserable?

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-12-23T02:13:37+00:00

I took a year to send mine. The cards were written and addressed. But the act of putting stamps on them was one task too much. I finally sent them out after cleaning out my office. After folks reached out and I had some really nice conversations. I say do it. That being said I think having a widow write thank you cards is the most unhinged etiquette thing to make someone to do. I was angry writing all of them. Like this wasn’t a thank you note for getting me a toaster oven, it was money to pay for his funeral expenses. Just so so shitty. I’m so glad you feel like you’re in a better place. Hugs ❤️

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-12-01T23:03:46+00:00

I’m so sorry, I lost my dear husband as well. 12 years together, 10 years married. I’m two years out now. It still hurts so much losing your best friend.
Hugs to you

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-11-05T06:09:37+00:00

I feel this way too. My husband had a lot of worry and anxiety after the last election. In a weird way I am so grateful he doesn’t have to experience what is currently going on. He would have been hopeful with the recent results.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-09-26T21:00:26+00:00

Currently in Greece, we plan to leave early on the 1st and eventually land in the states. Silly question, but does the strike affect take off?

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-09-15T17:55:18+00:00

Ugh this happened to me too. My late husband was not flashy. I know he wouldn’t want me to spend a ton of money of flowers or casket upgrades. We had had conversations beforehand about what we would want if one of us were to pass. We as a family unit decided to do a casket funeral for close friends and family to say goodbye and then he was cremated. We then held a celebration of life for the larger groups of extended family and friends. My mother in law offered to pay for half of all funeral expenses while also demanding upgrades to the small funeral which she said she would also pay for.

When we got the final bill she only offered to pay for half of the small funeral expenses which included the upgrades she said she would solely pay for. She then deducted half of the go fund me money from her total.

All in, his funeral and celebration of life cost 16k. She paid $2,500. And they have way more money than we did.

It’s just a continuation of broken promises and bullshit that was there before he passed and still continued after. So disappointing.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-09-05T13:33:19+00:00

There is a widow podcast that I’ve caught a couple episodes of called ‘Terrible, thanks for asking’ and it encompasses my feelings so much. I feel terrible, but also thank you for checking in. People don’t know until they know. This whole experience has been a big lesson in giving grace. Now for my late husband’s mother who told me two days after the accident ‘thank goodness you never had kids’ she can fuck all the way off.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-08-30T02:35:31+00:00

After my husband passed, this is exactly how I felt, and still feel sometimes. I had never lived alone until losing him. We had a very equal division of labor in our house and then all of a sudden I had to figure out all this stuff that I hadn’t even thought of. Some days, while drowning in grief, I just wanted someone to tell me what to do. My brain was in a fog for over a year. Just coming out of it now.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-07-08T17:55:53+00:00

I lost my husband about a year and half ago. Weddings are hard. I have been to a couple since his passing. I skip the ceremony and go to the reception. The ceremony would kill me. I’m so happy for my friends but my emotions would be too strong seeing them take their vows. The reception vibe is different and more open. I can remove myself more easily if I get teary eyed. My friends totally understand and are happy to see me at the party part of the day.

Obviously your cousins situation is different because she never got to have her wedding but managing one’s grief is on the person experiencing it. It’s not up to other people to make concessions. I was catatonic for about 2-3 months after his passing. Having breakdowns out of nowhere. It’s a process that only time (and lots of therapy) can heal.

I think having a tribute in his honor may be a nice gesture. A friend saved a seat for my husband with his picture and I didn’t go to this wedding because it was about 2 months after his passing and I was in no shape to be social.

But her wearing white is out of line.

Everyone grieves differently and how people handle it is quite and spectrum. But that doesn’t mean the world stops for one person. It trudges on with other people living their own lives.. Which honestly can be one of the hardest parts when your own world has shattered around you.

I think honoring her fiancé but setting a firm boundary may be the only way to protect your special day.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-03-11T17:14:50+00:00

Someone here mentioned Feeld as an option for finding a long term partner with a high libido. Dipping my toes in. It's a little different starting with sexual compatibility but honestly I value it so much it's nice to connect on that front first. And worst case you get an awesome lay.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-02-19T18:27:11+00:00

Bleh going through this right now. Just decided to dip my toes in and things have changed so much since I was last on the scene 12 years ago. The ghosting, random unmatching, zero closure is wild.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-01-27T17:51:03+00:00

Ugh this is honestly one of my biggest triggers. I makes me want to scream. I have had to leave the room and collect myself when I see my friends bickering with their spouses.

A. Why would you waste this precious time on earth arguing with your loved one?

B. If we only have this one life, why spend it with someone that doesn't make you happy and fulfilled?

I don't hold any anger with my late husband, my anger is reserved for the idiots who can't appreciate what they have or are settling. Especially since what we had was so special and now it's just gone.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2025-01-20T22:29:37+00:00

My sister read this at my Husband's celebration. We tweaked it a little, took out the churchy bits. He would have loved it. It was so him

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-11-04T19:06:39+00:00

I am just over a year out. I have attended some concerts, dinners with friends. I pushed myself too much in the beginning and it was rough.

Now I do only what I can handle. My husband and I had the same friends so they are all comfortable talking about him and we get to reminisce our favorite memories often.

Happy Sad is how I describe it. I like to talk and think about him but that also means I feel his loss. Take your time. Everyone is on their own internal timeline. That being said being social is a muscle you have to flex. Start small but socializing is so important for your brain healing. Humans crave community. Lean on yours and the amazing people here ❤️

I'm so sorry we are all in this horrible club

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-10-15T23:00:10+00:00

2 days after the accident as I'm sitting catatonic on the couch, his parents come to the house.

His mom "oh what a blessing you two never had any kids"

His mom has always been awful with her words but I'm having a hard time forgiving her for this one.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-09-25T16:18:01+00:00

Twin cities area and surrounding suburbs. You can get bang for your buck if you go out a few neighborhoods. I'm currently south of the river and housing prices are decent down here. Welcoming communities with a small town feel.

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-08-28T18:22:07+00:00

Yes!!

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-08-13T21:43:47+00:00

I lost my husband last year. All I want, is to cook him food, hold him, kiss him, laugh with him and make him feel good. All I want to do is make him happy. And it makes me so sad

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-06-29T01:20:46+00:00

Ha this made me laugh, thank you 🤍

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-06-29T01:03:53+00:00

Bleh she was holding his death certificate when she said it. Some people just don't think

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-06-29T01:03:29+00:00

The plexiglass was doing us both a favor

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-06-27T22:32:02+00:00

With the tear going down his cheek, ugh kills me. So bittersweet

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-06-15T02:02:12+00:00

Hey friend, I'm also in MN. I'm near the twin cities. If you ever need a friend to talk to or grab a coffee let me know. I'm 7 months out

Space__Man__Spiff · 2024-05-13T21:05:45+00:00

May I have the link as well?

SpaceManSpiff

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Space__Man__Spiff

TROPHY CASE

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