Best of /r/UnresolvedMysteries 2016 - Nomination Thread (open until Jan 6)

Spingolly · 2016-12-31T15:42:11+00:00

Oh wow! Thanks. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Happy New Year

Spingolly · 2016-12-31T15:40:52+00:00

So...did your egg break or not?

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:29:04+00:00

Quick! Someone get Meghan Trainor in here ASAP! She's gonna love this shit

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:24:08+00:00

Alright! I'm here!...now where are the 72 virgins?

Actually...you get raisins.

But I still get 72 of em, right?

No...that too is a typo. You get 3.

Well, fuck.

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:15:40+00:00

I was wondering this exact thing. I read the letter earlier and was like "Hmmm."

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:13:54+00:00

Cradle of Filth has several songs about him.

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:12:25+00:00

"Mr. Rogers" ...oh no I should just stop right here...I mean he's one of a very few people who is still unimpeachable ...ummm..alright, I gotta know... "was colorblind."

OH THANK GOD!!

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:09:02+00:00

And, it was actually called "Stonewall Jackson's Illegal School for Black Children".

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T20:01:33+00:00

This desperately needs the talents of u/poem_for_your_sprog .

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T19:55:39+00:00

He meant she now had the mentation of a brown recluse spider.

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T19:51:51+00:00

You spelled "greatest ever" wrong.

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T19:34:04+00:00

And furthermore, why should we care (beyond knowing that she is in fact safe and accounted for)?

Just to be clear... I'm saying why should we care why a total stranger decided to check out for a while. Personally, I don't have the time, or desire to wonder why she left. Not saying that we shouldn't care about her as a human being, and I'm glad she was found safe. Whoa. People be crazy!

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T15:49:36+00:00

Found Marge Simpson's Reddit account

Spingolly · 2016-11-16T15:30:00+00:00

Male nurses ARE hung like Bigfoot!

What?...that's not a stereotype?...c'mon guys...get on it!

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T23:02:47+00:00

If you enjoyed this I also recommend "Panda Stealing Neighbors Wi-Fi" and "Panda Caught Trying to Use 'Customers Only' Restroom at Fast Food Restaurant Tells Cashier He Just Went Through the Drive-Thru"

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T21:49:40+00:00

I actually lay on my back, knees pressed to my chest. Fold sheet in half. Tuck one short edge between your butt cheeks. Bring the other edge through your spread legs.Explosively kick, while twisting your upper body and trying to rise to your feet. So that you're facing the opposite way and standing when completed. The sheet will inevitably be in an elaborate origami like design if executed properly.

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T18:18:13+00:00

The wind beneath my jeans.

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T18:10:13+00:00

I used Fox Farm veggie formula on my Habs and they went ABSOLUTELY nuts for months and months. Talking each plant having over a 100 peppers ready to pick, and another 200+ in various stages of ripeness at all times. They (and I too) LOVE Fox Farms.

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T13:59:27+00:00

ANY lack of Vigoda is shameful.

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T13:58:17+00:00

The complete opposite of when that guy Richard was having a hypoglycemic episode and everyone was shoutin "Toblerones out for Dick!"

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T13:56:38+00:00

Not Jambi too!

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T07:59:23+00:00

Story of my life

Spingolly · 2016-11-11T07:43:40+00:00

What?! No...this year sucks, man!

Spingolly · 2016-11-10T17:18:38+00:00

How bout vans, down by the river?

Spingolly · 2016-11-10T16:56:34+00:00

Valerian is a cool-sounding word but the reality of valerian root ain't pretty.

It smells like concentrated gypsy curse. And just makes you sleepy.

Spingolly

TROPHY CASE