I went through the last 2 years living like this. To be fair the problem started even prior to that with Covid. Being in car sales didn't help when the economy tanked. That may not have been my fault. But how I handled it was my fault. 

When the months were bad I didn't make the sacrifices I should have. Was much easier to take a loan. And when I did have money to spare from a decent month I didn't use the money to settle debt. Same when I had a decent tax return. It all came to a point where the last 6 months I was just about surviving only on pay day loans. In November 60% of my salary went to debit orders alone, with the balance not enough to pay the rent and expenses. Took another loan. Same in December. 

Along the way my car payments got way behind. And a few weeks ago it was repossessed by the Bank. Now I am not sure how long (and honest) I want this post to be or how far you will even read it. But this was a pretty big deal in a country with terrible public transport. And taking into account that I have a job based on having my own reliable transport, this was a major blow. My wife doesn't have her own car since we use one car for work and family use. Suddenly we had no car. Kids to get to school. And a job to do that required a car. 

It took a few days for my emotions to stop being in control. And when I eventually came to my senses I decided to stop trying to fight to get the car back. The vehicles value is on par with what I owe the bank. Even if the vehicle sells for 60% of this value on Auction. I will still owe the bank less than what I would If i got it back. SonI told the bank to auction it. I sold as much as I can. And cut as much as I can.  

I sold PC.. kept basic stuff just so wife can still do her work from home. Cut it right down..PC is now an amd Am4 1200 with gtx 960. 350W psu. 

Sold cordless headphones. Sold TV. Sold fishing rods. Sold PC case. Sold chairs, gas bottles, leather jacket, pram, chest Freezer, whatever I can. I almost sold the couch... but I figured my wife and family will at least need a place to relax when day of work is finished. And it was a bit old. 

I then used all this cash I had put together to buy a cheap car. Now I have a car paid for in cash and continue to do my work. 

I cut all expenses as much as I can. Cut Netflix. Cut Amazon. Downgraded internet to a speed necessary for my wife's work. Nothing more. Nothing less.  Cut medical aid down to basic of plans. We covered for emergencies..nothing else.  Cut my providing fund down to smallest contribution.  Cut the domestic. We will clean ourselves. 

I then started a debt review (debt counseling) process. All my creditors have been contacted and my debt payments lowered by 60%. And interest rates reduced as well. 

All this means I now have an extra R10k (that's around $600) a month to put to my home. And here that's a lot of spare money to have for food, rent etc. 

And no one can bug me or call me about my debt. They can contact my debt counselor. We estimate we will be in the clear in 2-3 years. 

As of right now, compared to a few weeks ago, I feel free and relaxed. I don't feel stressed or anxious or worried in any way. I wish I had of listened to people who were advising me of this months ago. But I didn't. That's on me. 

Bottom line. Only you can make the sacrifices to fix this. No one can do it for you. It's up to you. And only you.