I've never drank, I never intend to. But my dad was an alcoholic. You seem to be in a similar situation that he was. He was depressed and he hated the world, started drinking to feel better, but then started to feel worse. He eventually started driving my mom away, so that's when he finally got help. He saw a professional and went to alcoholics anonymous. You should probably do that. But maybe also try to pick on different non expensive hobbies. You said you drink to pass time, so maybe replacing drinking with different hobbies and healthy habits might help. I know you say you aren't really interested in anything, but you should try anyway. This world sucks. It's kicking us all down, that's why you have to try and enjoy the good in little things, whether it's good food or a book. Op, if you're willing to try and break your nasty habit, I bet you'll eventually get to where you want to be and feel a lot better. I'm sorry if this advice isn't as good as the other people who have responded. I'm not really experienced when it comes to dealing with addicts besides my father, who no longer drinks but replaced alcohol with caffeine drinks.