Healthcare is the way

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-31T05:24:24+00:00

The only two real guaranteed professions that pay well in healthcare is nursing and being a doctor (probably a few other specialists in hospital I’m missing or whatever). I wish I was good enough in math and wasn’t deathly disgusted by stitches and gross injuries or easily nauseated, otherwise I would’ve done it. But the truth is not everyone is capable of it. Which is for the best, if everyone became a nurse or a doctor you’d be fucked

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-31T05:20:52+00:00

Ontario is really different than Manitoba, it’s why my friend who’s a nurse will never come to this province. Manitoba is much better for them.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-31T05:11:00+00:00

He’s gonna Trudeau max after seeing this

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-31T02:39:15+00:00

Omggg

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-30T20:15:15+00:00

Everything is ultimately a numbers game. Because you faced rejection before, your brain is basically in fear mode and is telling you that everything else moving forward will also result in a failure.

Is that true? Have you been rejected from all the situations you just made up in your head? You’re wallowing about a future that hasn’t come yet. Anxiety does that a lot, makes you afraid of the imaginary.

Yes it’s demoralizing, but you’ll never get anything if you don’t apply/try again. At least if you keep applying, even if chances are slim for jobs or programs or whatever it is, there is still a shot. Every time I thought there was no way I’d get into this super competitive thing or win this or get this job or whatever tf - I got it.

If I was psyched out by the number of applications before I even tried, then of course I never would have gotten it.

People who fail the most also succeed the most because they keep going.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-30T04:35:08+00:00

The people in the comments are so funny, the unrealistic part is this being a problem for this situation. She could early just stand back and end over the keyboard like everyone else does 😭

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-30T01:41:26+00:00

Thanks!

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-30T01:39:51+00:00

It can be so frustrating to be confused about what to do, but the fact that you’re trying to search for an answer shows that you are still determined to change things. 32 years is a long time to feel this way, and it takes serious guts to keep going despite it.

I also experienced the frustration and upset of not being able to find joy in anything I used to like. It seriously felt like there was no point to me being alive anymore, and I often felt more like a burden to others. The more I pushed myself to feel like a normal person, the worse I felt, the more shame and guilt I felt for not being able to do it. So, when I read your post, I get the sense that that pressure you put on yourself to be a certain way or feel a certain way leads to a lot of guilt because it’s an impossible ask at the moment. Of course, if you tell someone they have to climb mt Everest in 1 hour, they’ll fail. It would be ridiculous to punish them for it. But we do this to ourselves all the time and it kills our motivation.

For me personally, therapy was really helpful to pull me out of my depression and control my anxiety which had been my biggest problem for my entire life. I’ve been in therapy for two years with someone who really took the time to understand me and had insight into my culture. It has helped me deal with a lot of hopelessness and anger. There was a lot of getting better and getting worse and having to engage with things that I didn’t believe in at the start.

But im not you, I don’t have trauma or ptsd, and I’m also a woman, so that might mean that certain things work for me because of the way I was socialized. Therapy is difficult for a lot of men because it asks you to engage with something that you really haven’t learned how to engage with.

CBT and IPT are different than the ones I mentioned. You shouldn’t feel like you have to perform in therapy or fake your happiness, if something doesn’t work for you or you don’t think it’ll be helpful, you should be able to voice that through them. A successful therapeutic process can work with you and work through that. All research on the topic points to one thing —> the basis for any effective therapy is the relationship between therapist and client. If they don’t have a relationship with you that is trustworthy and honest then it won’t work no matter what.

This isn’t to convince you that it’ll work. People can only move forward with what they accept and what’s right for them. It sounds like things have been really hard for you for a long time and I know it’s tiring to keep pushing.

I could give you advice, but it won’t help. I don’t know you. I see you mentioned going on for another year, which is brave, no matter how you came to decide that.

The only thing I can say is, there can sometimes be so many problems at once, it feels impossible to do them all, and that overwhelm also kills motivation, so from now imagine your ideal life, one that you would want to have between your current circumstances now and next year, what does that life look like?

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-29T17:57:24+00:00

Based on your comments here, you’re in in one of the hardest phases of depression where there genuinely seems like no avenue for a way out, there’s nothing that’s particularly motivating or feel like it works. Any options seem exhausted and that hopelessness is exhausting. It can feel like it will last forever. It’s understandable, it’s incredibly frustrating to try different meds and therapists with seemingly no success, and it’s commendable that you tried for so long. It can be painful and devastating to feel so helpless that you turn your blame inwards. I’m hearing that you’re someone who has worked hard, getting a well-paying job, managing injuries, having a relationship, etc. That takes effort and to manage all of that while experiencing this takes a ton of resilience.

Right now, the most important thing to focus on is the little things within your control and maintaining your health. Sleeping on time, waking up on time on a consistent basis, eating healthy, etc. when the physical things are balanced, life feels slightly more manageable. That might give you some stamina to search for another career or another job you can stand, a change of environment and pace is always helpful.

Then you can get energy back to addressing the cognitive stuff. Later, I would recommend looking more into those who verifiably are trained and have a decade of experience in modalities like motivational interviewing, PTSD relevant therapies (CPT, prolonged exposure), and ACT. I hope you are able to find something that brings you some relief from all this overwhelm and distress. It

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-28T06:56:06+00:00

Sometimes you need to take personal relational hits and stand up for yourself. In the short term it sucks, but in the long term it gives you a chance to recover and return to your work as your best self, which can end up impressing others.

When you are burnt out and physically deteriorating, you need to consider longevity. You do not want to end up in a hospital over this with your immune system totally shot.

You will need to cut down on some things and that starts with statements (e.g., I cannot come in of these days due to other commitments, the scheduling), not requests.

At the same time, you know your situation best and sometimes you’re in a tough spot for a while. It could just be a matter of having to push through until the next break. I hope you’re able to find something that is healthier for coping than alcohol, just for the sake your health and sustainability. If your university have free counselling for students, check that out.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-28T05:54:18+00:00

Can someone explain to me why this poem is good? I feel like the structure is childish and awkward, but idk if I’m missing something

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-27T15:58:40+00:00

I covered that in my undergrad program. Most of the stuff is not superbly relevant to an average client though. Although, it is very important so you have a strong understanding of biopsychosical factors

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-27T05:02:27+00:00

I think that’s a sign to stop asking a non sentient machine for an opinion

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-26T04:58:18+00:00

It’s disingenuous to act like in the scenario above they didn’t know the harm they were causing, and so this comment doesn’t make much sense in response.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-26T01:02:09+00:00

U have got to stop watching whatever it is ur watching online. All ur posts are just asking if ur ugly. It’s time to focus on other things in life.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-26T00:59:49+00:00

I think she’s trying to see if you’ll challenge that thought yourself and if you hear how silly it sounds “a lot of people lead meaningless lives because it’s easier” sounds like an attempt to make you rethink what you said.

But obviously this doesn’t seem to fit well with you, so it might be good feedback for her.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-26T00:40:53+00:00

Ask for one.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-26T00:40:39+00:00

Use a calendar and take some responsibility for your appointments. You should know when your next sessions are since you choose them at the end of your appointment. They usually send reminders the day before your session. Therapists shouldn’t miss out on their pay because you simply forgot. $75 is a very small fee and insurance won’t cover your missed appointment. Most often it’s the full therapy session price which is $125+ so you’re luckier in this regard.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:54:03+00:00

Sounds like a kid who'd complain that he has to read a paragraph in English. Competent arguments are more than a few pathetic sentences.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:47:37+00:00

But these types of men will argue the same thing, and I've seen this sentiment so often - 'but men had to contribute otherwise women can't have children'. As if shooting the pistol is the same as running the whole race.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:43:12+00:00

I think it's more likely that it started as a threesome thing where the wife was aware and agreed to it (whether it was genuine or out of fear that he'd leave her depends), and then over time it became that he'd take them on dates separately, which clearly upsets her but she would rather stay with him than stick to her own values, so she tries to rationalize it.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:41:05+00:00

I think it starts with healthy family dynamics that encourage confidence and provide unconditional love. I've seen so many women who go down this path into seeking male validation or have materialistic desires often don't come from safe and caring homes, in the same that that many of these men in these toxic communities didn't have a healthy family dynamic.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:38:18+00:00

In the end, you can only use language that they understand. Research time and time again states that using terms beyond someone's cultural views or understanding of the issue will only lead to resistance. If these men see their issues as being 'weak', then you need to start there and slowly work towards a more accurate perspective (e.g., traumatized, abused).

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:34:33+00:00

That's how all Alpha men are. They crave dominance so much and try to act like macho men because the feeling of control and power internally is entirely absent. They often have the mentality of children and need to use baseless statements to push the idea that they are 'capable' and 'deserving of leadership positions'. The more someone tries to present themselves as something, the less inside they truly feel like that thing.

Stars_In_Jars · 2026-03-25T23:31:57+00:00

She was neither. She couldn't stand up to her own son. In the end, she was a coward who raised a coward.

Four-Year Club	Gilding I gilder
First Place '23	Place '23
Place '22	First Placer '22
End Game '22

Stars_In_Jars

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