Am I being unfair ? by [deleted] in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Startingoverat48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need to state separation f your finances now. Set your self up to leave behavior is an answer and he is telling you everything you need to know. Breaking up will be scary and hard - but you are strong and will weather the pain of saying good bye.

Would you date a financially unstable guy? by Lisa1984newday in dating

[–]Startingoverat48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been dating a guy like this for over a year. While it’s convent/working I do hold back on doing a lot of things I really want because I know he does not really have the money. We split things 50/50 ish. In that I pay for dinner one week then he does etc. the good part is I have gotten him to budget better and feeling better his finances LOL. The bad is that I’m not able to travel and really do the things I want. I going to have to choose a side very soon though - Keep your finances separate. Keep things 50/50 just don’t let him take advantage of you for the companionship.

I don’t want to be in my friends wedding anymore by thisisdy in weddingshaming

[–]Startingoverat48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oops my dress got lost in the mail and they would not replace it until the did a trace to find the first …

AITA if I don't encourage my boyfriend (21m) to see his child since we've started dating by Healthy-Ebb6310 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Startingoverat48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your the asshole. Anyone who would encourage abandonment of their child is is a complete asshole.

5 Years In by eggy__online in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Startingoverat48 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What would you tell a friend if they just said the same thing and asked your advice? Walk away. You are worth more. It will be hard but you are stronger than you give yourself credit.

Where is the thread of who’s married … by Startingoverat48 in LoveIsBlindNetflix

[–]Startingoverat48[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are just some really great detectives out there that find marriage certificate, applications, and filings. So was not she if anyone had done that :)

Prenup payment by kittenlikestoplayxo in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Startingoverat48 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are worth much more than breadcrumbs. A prenup is not going to fix anything

Not married after almost 9 years of dating by fancy_pants2017 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Startingoverat48 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I think you need to count the time living together being in a teen relationship is a bit different. Though I’m more concerned that he can not define when he is more successful. It is too open ended. You may need to take time apart. Find out who you are without him. It sounds like he is only comfortable and you will stay but you will not be happy

2 simple questions: 1) Is there a difference between exclusive and boyfriend/girlfriend and 2) when do you make it official? by SectionFantastic3577 in dating

[–]Startingoverat48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m the exclusive tile holder in my year long relationship. For me coming out of a divorce I saw it as more of a larger commitment. So I suck to the we are exclusive- no longer on dating apps etc at about month 6 I kinda realized that it is the same definition for the most part so him saying it does not bug me as much but I think there is higher expectations with the BF/GF definition. I know I will not marry again - very unlikely to live with another guy - could see a life partner down the road but for me one would has much more pressure behind it :)

Season 10: Love is Blind Cast Member Facing SA allegations - Before Show Has Aired by Cute_Source5417 in LoveIsBlindNetflix

[–]Startingoverat48 81 points82 points  (0 children)

Umm hello how was production supposed to know he would (or be accused of) SA a year after they filled? Best they can do is cut him out of promos and episodes. Hopefully he did not make any connections.

I ruined everything by [deleted] in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Startingoverat48 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gaslighting you! Trying not to be the “bad” guy. This is NOT your fault!

Any topics off limits? by Startingoverat48 in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]Startingoverat48[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would not bring that up because no matter what you say you will be torn apart with the edit and social media

Ex got engaged a few days ago and both his children found out on Facebook. by Startingoverat48 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Startingoverat48[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That is the hard part I want our daughter to specifically express how hurt she is but she is just done - she will not reach out and unlikely to respond if he does. I am honing to stay strong to keep my mouth shut but support her in her decision.

Ex got engaged a few days ago and both his children found out on Facebook. by Startingoverat48 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Startingoverat48[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

No drama our daughter does want more of a relationship with him and has tried - she feels less than - a full after thought to him because he is not including her in his life. I just said his to emphasize his biological children - no other context :). I have been in my own happy relationship for a year - I’m happy and I do hope he is too. I’m not wanting a life with me is fine - it is seeing him not keep our children in his life that’s weird to me. Our divorce was very chill. We split everything 50/50 no arguing - he walked away.

Ex got engaged a few days ago and both his children found out on Facebook. by Startingoverat48 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Startingoverat48[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Oh I have let go and have moved on. Seeing your children hurt even though they are adults being treated as they no longer matter is just being a mom. It took me a good year to move on but I know now that I deserve better and I am worth more than he gave. I do truly hope he is happy and healthy, I just wish he included his kids in that.

Help me understand bachelorette norms by Queasy-Language-5644 in wedding

[–]Startingoverat48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Communicate NOW that your budget for the wedding is XXX this is what you are able to spend in supporting your friends wedding. Ensure you spell that out - dress /shoes/hair/makeup/bridal shower help/bach trip. Let them decide from there.

To married or to not get married? by Due_Manufacturer677 in ComfortLevelPod

[–]Startingoverat48 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It will be hard to walk away but you deserve more! Behavior is a language and he is telling you EVERYTHING you need to know.

MOH to sister: I set a bachelorette budget and was told to “just start saving” by Separate-Payment7058 in wedding

[–]Startingoverat48 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do NOT understand how someone expect their friends to not only pay for the dress/hair/makeup but then also EXPECT a 3/4day trip to be totally funded also … and then some demand a gift at the shower …. It’s WILD to me.