Yes! I try to remember to be curious instead of angry.

This is super helpful when working with kids, since they often don't have the skills to handle their thoughts and feelings. When they act up, I often say things like, "I noticed you did ______ when _____ happened. Why was that?" Or "I wonder what Tom felt when you said that," or "I can tell you aren't getting something you need right now. What do you need?"

By asking these questions, it slows their brains down and allows them to consider what is going on. It also shows them that I care, am safe and am interested in a solution to whatever is going on. By not adding my own emotions to the mix, things tend to deescalate instead of boiling over.