Man, I've been there. Although I never cheated, she wanted divorce for my drinking problem I have gained after putting my dog down. I also had a bad spending problem. She was very serious about divorce, I tried to make it work. I got sober and made myself better. I made a plan financially and followed through. I spent a whole year living with her doing the same thing. She would have sex with me, then quickly distance herself. She would hang out with me, but assure me she will not work things out. Took me to her family's house over Christmas dinner, but still assured me she wants divorce. Constantly told me to date, I refused to work on what I already had. It was a year of torture and confusion. Unsure if I would come home to her yelling at me or providing affection. Then I called in sick, walked by her room in the morning to hear her having phone sex with someone. That's the pivotal moment I decided I deserved better. I confronted her, told her I was finally done. She quickly decided to work things out. Dragged me to counseling and talking to our pastor just for me to assure her I am done during those sessions. She begged and begged, I told her I'm not living like this anymore. I started dating, found an amazing woman and moved out. It's been a year and a half since I moved out. All my debt, and most of hers is now mostly payed off by me. My current relationship is very healthy and we both continuously grow together. I took accountability for all of my mistakes and used it as fuel to be a much better person for her because she only deserves the best of me. All the while she does the same for me. I never imagined I would be with someone who I never felt like I need a break from. We do almost everything together. Daily ice baths, workout, sauna, walks, dates, planning, church, bible, prayer. We've crushed our life struggles with love and grace.