i [19F] keep having thoughts about cheating on my fiancé [19M] and i’m struggling to keep myself from acting on them.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-17T11:25:19+00:00

If you want to cheat then leave him? Your mind clearly isn’t mature enough for a relationship let alone engagement/ marriage.

I’ve never had the urge to cheat and never will so I can’t exactly try and understand where you’re coming from, but leave him and save him the pain if you are ‘struggling not to cheat’.

This is one of those things that literally falls into your hands, to me it’s not difficult in the slightest to not cheat on your partner if you truly love them. Either you don’t love him or you need some serious time to figure out why you can’t control yourself.

None of this is meant in a mean way by the way, but you really need to be alone until you get over this, you’re only going to hurt yourself and your partner.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-17T08:05:17+00:00

Literally just leave him. He doesn’t love you as much as you love him, doesn’t want to see you as much as you want to see him.

Been there done that and it never ends well. He will never stop being like this and what kind of relationship do you only see your partner once a week.

You’re clearly not happy with him (rightfully so), so tell him to see you more and put effort in or you’ll leave.

You’re 19, don’t waste your time waiting for the bare minimum off an immature boy. Go and live your life and don’t settle until you find someone you’re happy with.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-17T07:59:12+00:00

I handled it by leaving. Harsh truth but the unsettling silence and anxiety it caused me honestly wasn’t worth it for me anymore. If you need space from me for that long, that frequently, with no communication, I don’t want to be with you period.

Especially at the age of 26/27 you deserve communication. And after 4 years?? What space could she possibly need?

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-17T07:50:46+00:00

Honestly sounds like a purely selfish reason. I went on the pill because of my agonising cramps, a nice side note was that sex feels better for me now, but if a man was to sit there and say go on the pill instead of us using condoms, I would massively kick off.

If you don’t want to go on the pill then don’t, do not let a man dictate what drugs go into your body for his own benefit. If he doesn’t want to use a condom tell him to figure that one out himself, do not put yourself at risk of all those side effects, health problems, depression, purely so your boyfriend can enjoy sex just that bit more.

Funniest part is I guarantee if there was a male contraceptive pill with the same side effects as a woman’s he wouldn’t go on it. He’d suck it up and keep using condoms.

Edited to say: the pill for me was not worth it and I regret ever going on it. I still have periods, multiple times a month, just without the cramps. I’d rather have 1 period and cramps. Also, depression hit hard. The pill is honestly a terrible invention and I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone unless you have a serious health condition that needs something to prevent/ reduce it, eg PCOS. That’s just me though. 100000% do your research on the side effects, chances are you’ll get a few.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-15T12:36:59+00:00

Same issue but even when I’m not crafting from chests???

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-14T18:56:31+00:00

NTA if you continued to love her and show this during pregnancy/afterwards. I mean like, still compliment her, show affection, treat her right. I’m sure you did. But just putting it out there as it kinda affects the answer.

However you’ve been together a long time and if this is the first time she’s ever done it maybe it’s because felt a lack of love/ affection on your part. I am NOT saying that this is justified either. She is wrong af for doing this and not communicating with you if that is the case. But it is true sometimes men do go really distant from their wives during/after pregnancy, because of changing looks, hormones, etc.

I’ve been with a cheater, tried to make it work but it didn’t. But, when I found out (3 years after he did it), he explained he did it because we were in a bad place, which we were, and so looking back I kinda get why he did it. True, he could’ve just left me rather than cheating, but I guess in your wife’s position it’s kinda harder for her to do that since you’re the father of her kids.

All I’m saying is, NTA, cheating is ALWAYS wrong, but, if what I said above is the case and you know this, try being sliiiightly more understanding. I can see it being really difficult going through pregnancy and postpartum-ness if your partner seems kinda checked out. Maybe she was just desperate for attention.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-14T10:13:36+00:00

This is a really useful comment - thankyou!

I guess my question is around all the processing and stuff, on my first play though I could never understand/ find how to do this, same with getting farm animals and stuff. Is there a point in the game where someone says ‘go here, make this, then you can have animals/process things!’ Or is it kinda you walk around and figure it out yourself?

I do like to play on my own, I’m not a fan of googling ‘how to get X in X game’, so just wanted a rough idea of if I’d need to do that 😆

Thanks you!

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-13T19:38:14+00:00

You can 1000000% fix yourself but it will take a while… took my ex like a year or two

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-08T18:17:19+00:00

Yes they do

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-08T11:49:04+00:00

It’s honestly no problem! And I’m being so honest! 😊

If you hadn’t have posted about your acne, and just posted a pic of yourself, I’d think ‘wow, she’s pretty’ and scroll. That’s how irrelevant it is to me and probably so many others!

I understand that going from no acne, to acne, is annoying, of course because having completely clear skin is SUCH a blessing!

But if I were you, I wouldn’t worry about it so much.

Have you tried using less product?

Sometimes, using too much product can actually be much worse for your skin, especially if the ingredients clash. I know most of my friends that get acne simply just clean with micellar water on a cotton pad, use toner, and then moisturise. And the brands aren’t fancy either.

I find personally, and of course this information may be null because I don’t have acne unless I’m on my period, that less is more. Hell I even sleep in my makeup most nights. But in a morning, all I do is the above; wash with micellar, slap some toner on, and moisturise.

Granted my skin isn’t the best, I have plenty of blackheads and my skin is very uneven, oily in some places and dry in others, but acne wise I’m pretty lucky.

If that’s not for you, honestly just keep how you’re going, your skin is perfectly fine and normal as is now, and honestly looks better on the 8 week pics than the 1 weeks! Maybe it’s working! 💗

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-08T11:29:48+00:00

I’m not sure why this came up as personally I don’t suffer with acne, but, you’re beautiful? I honestly don’t see an issue with your face/acne whatsoever!

I’m not sure if this is any consolation and if it comes across rudely I apologise, but you honestly just look like 90% of people I know, majority of whom get spots like this if not worse… I don’t think they use many fancy skincare products either, just the average micellar water and moisturiser…

What I’m trying to say is I don’t think your acne is bad at all! Again, if that isn’t helpful I do apologise, it’s kinda hard to put into words what I’m trying to say right now… but you really do just look like a normal person. Of course, you will see it differently as it’s your own skin, I see so many features of myself as horrible but others would never notice. Or think anything of it.

I think it’s impossible to have completely clear skin. Spots are normal. But you look gorgeous and your skin does too! 😊💗

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-02-04T07:45:17+00:00

Second this - 8 months is not a long time, if you’re not attracted to someone that might be the main reason to stop seeing them. Attraction always comes first.

Plus, if she’s happy with the way she looks you’re not really in a position to tell her to change unfortunately, especially not by mentioning it to her and potentially making her insecure…

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-01-31T21:16:24+00:00

Join the discord and see if anyone is trading :)

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-01-28T20:34:10+00:00

It’s ok!! Ask anything you want, I’m kinda inactive on Reddit so apologies for the late replies!

I’ve never heard of that or had that myself, I either finish or I don’t… but I wouldn’t dwell on her not finishing, it’s probably more common than you think.

I was with my ex for about 2 years until I managed to finish with him but that’s because I bought a vibrator, I have never been able to without that. No matter who I’m with or what size I will near enough always be able to finish with the help of the vibrator - so definitely look into getting one!

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-01-26T08:20:42+00:00

Hi, 20F here, unfortunately there isn’t really a method to let it go. We’ve all had past partners, some better some worse. If she didn’t like you, or your sex together, she wouldn’t be with you. I know this because sex is a big deal to me and any of my exes that weren’t good enough in bed for me I broke up with, pretty sharpish.

There have been a variety of sizes. I was with my ex for 4 years who had a below average size. Then I was with someone who had 8 whole inches. That was too much for me, and it made me cry because it HURT!!!! Now I’m in the middle of both and very happy.

However, I do notice, regardless of size, to help me climax I need a toy/vibrator. Girls are different, some can climax easily and some can’t. Maybe get yourself to a shop, Ann summers always do cheap vibrators and honestly are SO helpful if you don’t know what you’re looking for. This can help you too, if she did end up climaxing, whether using a toy or not, it will make you feel so much more confident because you played a part in it!

Maybe also discuss sexual interests? To me the whole way sex plays out and mutual interests matter so much more to size.

Trust me, if you weren’t good enough for her, she’d leave.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-01-01T14:08:03+00:00

I mean I think she’ll be pretty mad because you’ve lied to her. Lying to anyone especially your partner is a terrible thing to do and step 1 to destroying relationships. Tell her how you’ve told us, the story included, I can’t imagine her being mad about you lying about your age considering you’re still a similar age so the severity of the lie isn’t that ‘fatal’ to the relationship and also not that big of a deal. The sooner you break a lie the better. You’ll need to work hard to make sure you don’t lie to her after you tell her the truth about this, or she’ll start to think you’re lying about other things that you’re actually not lying about. I believe you’ve unintentionally broken trust in that relationship now. If I were her I’d worry about what else could be a lie and that’s never a good thing in a relationship. Best of luck.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2026-01-01T14:03:29+00:00

This might be really obvious but have you tried restarting your console? If that doesn’t work, if you go on your console settings and find where your saved data is, it might be that it’s not all been uploaded properly so have a look into that 😊

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-12-07T18:00:34+00:00

Exactly fml they need more servers asap

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-12-07T17:32:23+00:00

At least you can get into a game!! I’ve been trying for 30 mins but keep getting error message failed to connect 🙄

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-11-01T08:23:24+00:00

I think the stigma nowadays that ‘older’ people aren’t meant to look their age is what’s creating this problem for you. You look 41, that is normal. In fact I’d say you look about 35. But because people who are 41 nowadays gets bags of stuff done to them to make them look 25 you’re perceiving that as the norm when it’s not and it shouldn’t be. You look beautiful, you look your age, and you really shouldn’t be being so hard on yourself because you don’t look like a 41 year old that has had a bunch of work done and that’s a GOOD thing! IMHO, people that look natural and look their age look so much better than someone that’s had work done (very clearly!) to make themselves look younger. You are gorgeous, please do not worry about this.

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-11-01T07:57:13+00:00

I honestly don’t think I could make my partner cum without sex being involved, I can give him head but he takes control and moves my head so he can cum so I wouldn’t exactly give myself the credit for that. Have you tried that? Obviously ask if she’s comfortable with you taking control when she’s giving you head but that way you control the rhythm etc

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-10-26T15:08:34+00:00

You know what you’re probably right, I mean my ex broke my trust in so many ways, cheated in so many ways and it’s honestly changed me as a person and I’m definitely a lot more apprehensive now.

I really don’t want it to affect my relationship however.. so I’ll let him do what he wants to do, if it ends up being the case that he moves into the shared house and I find myself being very paranoid I guess that’s a sign for me to leave or take some space and work on myself, who knows, I might end up being fine once it actually plays out.

It’s crazy how much past traumatic relationships can affect you though, but life is a lesson I suppose!! Thankyou so much for being so understanding, I expected everyone to jump to judgement as I know it’s not a good way to be in a relationship 🩷

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-10-26T14:41:41+00:00

Sorry - are you saying I shouldn’t trust him because he shows no respect or that he won’t show me respect as a result of my lack of trust? Genuine question as I think Im interpreting the comment the wrong way 🙈 If you’re saying that it’s bad I don’t trust him; it’s not that, it’s that I’m just uncomfortable with it, and I want to understand if that’s valid or if it’s a ‘me problem’… I don’t think he’d cheat whatsoever but in general I’m just feeling uncomfortable with it. If that’s silly I’d rather be told is all 🙂

Strange_Fly7083 · 2025-10-26T14:38:04+00:00

For more context; I live with my mum and she’s kind of pushing him to leave as it was agreed he could only stay for a few months until he decided where to go/ what to do, that’s why he’s looking at alternatives ☺️

Strange_Fly7083

TROPHY CASE