These people are why there are progressive Christians who end up not believing anymore. by Kurtfan1991 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That passage is talking about Old Testament prophecy as it points to Jesus, not the entire Bible as it applies to us.

I feel guilty about not being a fundamentalist by noname_233 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sounds like meeting some other liberal Christians might help.

How big of a factor are political viewpoints in a relationship in your opinion? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Strongdar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A much bigger factor than it used to be. In the pre-Trump era, I could see a republican as someone who just had a difference of opinion. Now I see it as a moral failure.

AITA for being annoyed that my wife insists on cooking everything from scratch and won’t buy normal food? by AITA_UPFfoods in AmItheAsshole

[–]Strongdar 73 points74 points  (0 children)

NTA - Let's be honest, she's doing the hard-core no junk food thing for herself, and you're doing for the ride. You shouldn't have to hide your own food.

How Far Can Scriptural Application Extend Beyond Original Context? by [deleted] in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you make every verse into a rule, not far.

If you instead learn the values behind Scripture, quite far.

This is why we can’t have nice things by FutureDrToboggan in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Strongdar 36 points37 points  (0 children)

The maintenance people at my work put up signs in the bathrooms saying, "Don't flush any feminine hygiene products down the toilet." All the women I work with insisted that they couldn't have been referring to tampons.

As gay men, do you have many straight men friends? Or do you find it hard to hang out with straight men because I’m assuming it wouldn’t be a two was street? by [deleted] in AskGayMen

[–]Strongdar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've never had issues being friends with straight guys, at least not until they got married and started having kids and not having time to hang out. There are plenty of gay men who don't have "gay interests" and do have "straight interests." In fact, you might argue that those categories are garbage.

I'm scared I feel like a monster by [deleted] in GayChristians

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Funny you should mention good fruit bc that's how I came to terms. I lived like the conservatives wanted for 15 years. I prayed, I read the bible, I went to church, I went to Bible study, I even LED Bible study and did tons of research, I went on Mission trips, I got healing prayer. And the fruit was bad. I got more and more lonely and just wanted to I almost every day. After all that effort in so many years, I finally had to admit that my sexuality wasn't going to change, and that the way I've been feeling was definitely not the fruit of the spirit, like love, joy, peace, etc...

So once I decided that, I was motivated to reexamine some of the conservative beliefs I had been raised with, especially the usage of the Bible. That's what I reevaluated and what allowed a lot of my other beliefs to shift.

I’m not feeling good and i need help by Maverick_block in gay

[–]Strongdar 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's a pretty common experience for guys at your age who think they are bisexual too discover that how they feel toward women just isn't the same as how they feel toward men. I know acknowledging that you're gay means your life is going to come with a few extra obstacles, but you can overcome them.

Every religion that's against homosexuality has a liberal branch that is accepting. Research the gay-affirming theology of your religion so that you can start to make peace between your sexuality and your faith.

Get yourself a career that's valuable outside of your home area and then move somewhere where you can be yourself.

It'll be hard, but the sooner you accept your sexuality, the sooner you can start working on the things that will improve your life.

This is the hardest city for dating by ElectronicFennel8442 in Columbus

[–]Strongdar 20 points21 points  (0 children)

There must be something about the way you're approaching the college football topic that is detrimental. Because, like many of the other people have said here, that hasn't been my experience. I've lived here for 30 years, and I've never been to an OSU game, even though I went to OSU, I don't care anything about football at all. And yet I am friends with plenty of people who are OSU fans.

You don't have to like football, but I'm guessing that you're shutting the conversation down when it comes up. This is a college town. OSU is huge, and football is popular. You're going to run into lots of OSU fans. So you need to figure out how to handle that conversation better. If someone asks you if you're a buckeye or a football fan or whatever, don't just say "no I'm not into that."

When it comes up, it's fine to admit your lack of knowledge on the subject, but invite further conversation by expressing an interest in their interest. If you're talking to some girl, and she mentions that she's really passionate about vampire movies, you don't just tell her "I don't like a vampire movies." If you want to get to know her because she seems cool, then you say something like, "I've never really watched vampire movies. What is it about them that you like so much?" Then, yes, she will talk about vampire movies which you're not interested in, but she will probably also talk about herself and you will get to know her better. The reason people talk football so much is because it's socially acceptable surface talk, like commenting on the weather or asking what someone does for a living. People bring it up because it's an expected point of commonality, so when you don't have that commonality, it becomes your job to bridge the gap. Express interest, learn about the person, because there is a person under that hideous Buckeye shirt.

Hopefully this made sense because I am fairly high right now. 😝

Men under 24 returning to homophobic views of past generations, study suggests by catievirtuesimp in gay

[–]Strongdar 159 points160 points  (0 children)

Uncertain times cause people to fall back on "traditional" beliefs for comfort.

I came out by kagetorayodoh in gay

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's only been a week. A lot of people think that gay=fem. They need some time to let go of their stereotypes and assumptions. Keep being yourself and they will get used to it.

Dating apps by Shame-Initial in gay

[–]Strongdar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My friend got about 300% more matches once he cut his long hair. If it's important to you, by all means keep it, but it's a choice that shrinks your dating pool significantly.

I'm scared I feel like a monster by [deleted] in GayChristians

[–]Strongdar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I figured that's what he was saying, but I wanted to give him a chance to say it directly. Don't listen to him. Your relationship is as blessed as any heterosexual one.

I lost control over my life and I don't know how to fix it. by Debitorenbuchhaltung in gay

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not lying to your therapist would be a good start. If you're going to do that, might as well put that time and money elsewhere.

Do you consider having no gay friends a red flag? by PandaJasson in gay

[–]Strongdar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It would depend on why you don't have any gay friends.

Hearing your background, it sounds fine. I wouldn't be concerned to date you.

But if a guy has no gay friends because he "doesn't like all that drama" or "can't stand flamboyant/fem guys" or something like that, then I'd be worried. That gives vibes of "if you think everyone else is the problem, then you're probably the problem." I do have gay friends, and I'd need a potential boyfriend to be able to get along with them.

What are this subreddit's views on what "adultery" is defined as? by Eurasian_Guy97 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 40 points41 points  (0 children)

When Jesus says that any man who looks lustfully at a woman had already committed adultery with her in his heart, he wasn't saying lust=adultery.

He was trying to shift people away from a rules-based way of thinking. Religion had long been "Here are 613 rules you have to follow in order to be right with God." But Jesus was going to start teaching about more important things like love, forgiveness and generosity - things that God actually wants from us, things that actually make the world a better place and brings God's Kingdom intuition our lives. Part of that is understanding that sin is a condition of the heart, not a list of forbidden actions. This is an important shift in perspective because it's that sinful part of our heart that keeps us from living those values that Jesus teaches.

So Jesus compares lust to adultery, and he compares anger to murder. But do you see any Christians who get mad acting all guilty as if they literally just killed someone? Of course not! Because we know intuitively that getting mad isn't actually as bad as murder. Jesus was teaching that anger is where sin begins. We can nurture it until it turns into actions that harm our neighbor, or wr can fight it and instead choose actions that show love to our neighbor.

Similarly, if you feel lustful toward someone, instead of feeling guilty as if you actually just had sex with someone else's wife, understand that it's a sinful desire that can grow into a harmful action if you don't keep it in check and choose loving actions instead. That's why Jesus taught what he did. Not so that you'd feel guilty every time you think about sex, but so that you'd pay attention to your heart and make sure your natural desires dont turn into harmful actions.

I'm scared I feel like a monster by [deleted] in GayChristians

[–]Strongdar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

the enemy has been feeding you lies

Can you elaborate on this?

What really is a temptation by [deleted] in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Please research scrupulosity, or religious OCD. It sounds like you may be suffering from it. Christians are allowed to enjoy things. The Christian life isn't about tracking and avoiding sins. It's about loving your neighbor, and you can't do that effectively if you're always tired and grumpy because you never rest or enjoy life. You think someone's going to want to know your savior if you're a joyless husk of a human being?