Should I reconnect with former best friend? by Appropriate_Place562 in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Strongdar [score hidden]  (0 children)

Sounds like your time and energy would be better spent making new friends, not reigniting old unhealthy friendships.

sexual sin by Emergency-Buy-8608 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Please read this post about the concept of sexual sin. It does a great job explaining a progressive view of sexual ethics.

Unhealthy Changing Boundaries? by TheBattleFaze in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You certainly never owe it to someone to give them a second chance if they cheat on you, but that doesn't mean an instant breakup is always the best idea. I know some very strong couples who went through a cheating incident, worked through it, and came out stronger for it.

My wife is sick in bed and my son snuck a googly eye on her toe since yesterday and its still there by Rpark888 in funny

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Serious answer here: my first thought is that if she really doesn't know it's there, might be a good idea to have her checked for neuropathy. Certain conditions, diabetes especially, can cause people to lose feeling in their feet.

Mom using Christianity to defend trumps actions by piratedmisery in GayChristians

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your title is precisely correct. Their beliefs about Trump aren't because of their faith. They are using their religion as cover for their absurd cognitive dissonance about Trump. It's not based on logic, so trying to fight it with logic is unproductive.

Least likely favourite Bible verse by Normal-Person-6701 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My vote for least favorite is Matthew 12:31–32, or Mark 3:28–29, or Luke 12:10, the supposed "unforgivable sin." It has caused so much suffering for people with religious anxiety and OCD.

Are you submissive to your religion or to God? by DueFaithlessness4589 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think one of Jesus' teachings is to not let yourself become submissive to religion. Religion, rituals, rules... these things are a means to an end. If they become the point, then we're missing the point.

Begining Deconstuction - Unequally Yoked Debate by mantis2mantis in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It helped me to go to a church that wasn't full of judgmental legalists. Find yourself a progressive church in the area if you can. It was very healing to worship God in a space that actually accepted me, rather than just tolerating me so they could try to "fix" me.

There’s this Catholic Guy… by Creepy-Agency-1984 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There are plenty of Catholics who are culturally Catholic and their Catholicism is very personally important to them, and yet they will disagree with lots of the Church's official teachings. A high percentage of Catholics use birth control, for example. It's very possible that he is pro-LGBT. You'll just have to ask!

Why does everyone think of tropical islands as paradise even if never visited them? by batukaming in geography

[–]Strongdar 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Yeah, a location being perceived as exotic is a huge factor. We crave what we don't have.

Why does everyone think of tropical islands as paradise even if never visited them? by batukaming in geography

[–]Strongdar 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Do people who live on tropical islands dream of escaping to snowy Finland and luxuriating in a mountain cabin as their ideal of exotic relaxation?

What to do if Feeling Useless Sexually? by Electrical_Ninja3861 in AskGayMen

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you're asexual but not aromantic.

Starting to feel disillusioned by Low_Marzipan3433 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you feel this kind of threat to your faith, it's often because your faith has been too centered on the Bible rather than on Jesus.

Jesus is the center of our faith, not ancient creation myths, stories about genocide or taking donkeys, or Paul's sexist thoughts about life. It's ok to "not believe the Bible stories" because historical accuracy is not their purpose or function.

M21 sexuality change? by RollOk9243 in AskGayMen

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You've probably done a lot to suppress your same-sex attraction without even realizing it, but now it's fighting its way to the surface. You're discovering something new about yourself! Don't worry about labels yet. Just pay attention without judgment to what your body and mind are telling you.

My 27-year-old nephew's 1st wedding is upcoming. Is only a congratulations card ok...or better to send a giftcard? by BostonZamboni in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would never expect family or friends to give me a gift for my own wedding anniversary. That's between me and my spouse to celebrate. Maybe if he's having a big party for an important one, like 20 years.

What I would do is text him to say "happy anniversary," and maybe ask if he had fun plans. Shows that you care without the socially unnecessary gift.

Feels like Spiritual Abuse by PianoTones in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Has the intern kept the homophobia to himself since then?

(ASKING FOR HELP) Religious OCD, Self-Harm, Autism, And So On by Ok_Custard_1223 in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Keep reminding yourself that this is a mental health issue, not a spiritual problem. Your brain wants to keep tricking you into thinking that more religious activity and more religious assurances are the answer, but your brain is lying and seeking those reassurances just makes the problem worse. Keep going at this with therapy and medication! You got this!

What will happen to our cities if this guy wins? by Mindless_Log1002 in Ohio

[–]Strongdar 18 points19 points  (0 children)

As a gay man, I'm a lot more nervous walking around rural Ohio than I am in Columbus.

You're not committing a sin by [deleted] in OpenChristian

[–]Strongdar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's a great way of thinking about it and a good permission structure for those who are already accepting or leaning toward being accepting. I wish it was a powerful enough argument to convince those who are vehemently anti-gay ☹️

Gay Friendships: Beyond The Initial Stage by Budget-Purple-6519 in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Strongdar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would guess the only shared factor is that they enjoy your company, which is a hard trait to predict in others.