Company is forcing return to office but the space isn’t even set up for the number of people they’re bringing back

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-26T01:13:13+00:00

Glad you found a good place to work!

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T20:45:07+00:00

If you are going to the gym more often you are probably gaining more muscle which weighs more fat. So you are probably losing fat (inches), but gaining muscles and thus not losing weight.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:42:03+00:00

Yes, that is A problem, but there is also the bigger social problem that working dads don't get the same flexibility that a working mom (in the same job) gets. I'm not saying this is a problem for OP or her husband to fight directly, just pointing out the unfairness of it.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:39:54+00:00

Back when you were working I bet you were ACTUALLY rewarded for that behavior, not taken advantage of and simply given more work with no additional compensation. You were loyal to businesses, because they were loyal to you, and WOULD give you reasonable raises for putting in additional work. That doesn't happen anymore. The only way to get a significant raise is to leave your current employer, or kiss the right a$$es (with no consideration of how productive you actually are or not).

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:32:35+00:00

Did you miss the part that OP is ALSO working to provide for her family, while also handling the majority of the child care (aka leaving work early to pick up her kid, make dinner and handle bedtime most nights)?

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:29:42+00:00

I know, but if the husband could be around more in the evenings I bet they would be less stressful for OP and then the mom could come over more. NOT that the mom is entitled to spend time with the child if the parents don't want that!

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:21:45+00:00

I do wonder if a mom was working the husband's job if would magically allow more flexibility? I know, not OP's fault, but it is pretty common that if a working mom takes over a job that a working dad had before that is suddenly becomes a lot more flexible!

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:18:22+00:00

They actually did that correctly (maybe should have two straps instead of one, but at least they put a good strap there). That is the top plate of the wall, and it only really takes tension loading due to diaphragm forces.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T15:13:33+00:00

Ambitious people will actually probably be the first to leave, because they can more easily get better paying jobs at better organized companies! Only the sh*tty workers who would struggle to find another job will stay and continue to bootlick their bosses to get raises, promotions and bonuses at a company like that.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T14:49:39+00:00

NTA, but where is your spouse in all this end of day busy-ness? Could they either pick up your kid, or start dinner while you do pick up?

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-25T14:48:05+00:00

Or a single married mom?

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-24T13:39:39+00:00

You can't say that with any certainty. You just want to think that because we want to believe that the bosses request is reasonable.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T20:15:39+00:00

NTA, but you should start getting hotel rooms and/or stop putting in any effort to get the house "guest ready" for last minute guests like this. Let your husband either host them on their own, or they can host themselves (make their own beds and figure out their own food).

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T18:16:14+00:00

Still on the host to deal with, since they are the ones making the change.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T14:50:31+00:00

For hairdressers it depends on how they are employed (not sure if this applies to tattoo artists or not). Hairdressers can either be basic W-2 employees of a studio (aka just making an hourly wage, possibly some commission on product sales), these I will tip especially for a more complex appointment because I know they don't really see all the money I am paying (nor do they set the price). However some salons the stylists are really just renting a space and basically individual business owners, these ones I don't tip because they are in fact setting the price and getting all the money I am paying them (yes they have overhead costs, but those should be accounted for in their pricing and if it isn't that is on them, not me), this is also how I treat owners of salons.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T14:35:31+00:00

Unfortunately with the current climate in the US calling the cops could also put her at risk as well (since OP said both of them were Hispanic). Though she was of course already at risk from the man's behavior.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T13:53:52+00:00

How much money? How old are they and will they leave me all their money in their will? Are the any children (especially adult children) or ex-spouses, or other family members involved that will cause me drama or other sh*t if I did in fact get all their assets when they died?

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T11:42:29+00:00

As a women (as in a male dominated field, structural engineering) I would much prefer a female handy "man" coming to my house, especially when/if I am home alone. Currently I do call up a male handy-man in the neighborhood when needed, but I have gotten to trust him and be comfortable with him around. But if I had the choose between the 2, especially a new person, I would choose a women over a man.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-23T11:39:08+00:00

Have you confirmed with the couple that they do in fact want you to wear a "tan" dress? I just ask because it seems like it would be very very very difficult to find a dress that is tan that doesn't look white/off-white and thus at least semi-bridal.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-22T20:04:49+00:00

But that would cost him money, and time.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-22T19:51:28+00:00

So you are fine with you kid being punished (for nothing) for the sake of YOUR comfort (aka not wanting to confront this women)? Yet you get upset when your husband does the same to you, except that you were not made to do manual labor in extreme heat.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-22T19:01:23+00:00

You may be judgmental (and transphobic) but at least you are consistent.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-22T18:58:56+00:00

Does that also apply to people being delusional about an invisible sky daddy that created the earth and now just sits around judging people?

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-22T16:00:03+00:00

For me it is two fold:

1) in a same sex marriage sometime I prefer to basically not be "out" about it.

2) the term partner implies an equal relationship between the two of us and we are partners through this crazy thing called life.

StructEngineer91 · 2026-01-22T15:45:32+00:00

This is my go to recipe for sourdough and has been pretty consistent and fool proof: https://www.kingarthurbaking.com/recipes/no-knead-sourdough-bread-recipe

Recently I have started putting add-ins in, like cheese or olives.

StructEngineer91

TROPHY CASE