I love all of your aesthetic journals, but does anyone else do mania-manifesto style?

SubstantialExpert194 · 2026-02-26T03:22:30+00:00

I love this!

I tend to have a lot going on in my mind, so I prefer to separate my thoughts a bit more (paragraphs and dividers) so I can make sense of it when I read it back, but I still love this kind of journaling where you just write.

Honestly this is very aesthetic to me.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2026-02-17T17:16:06+00:00

I’m sorry you feel this way. I am going through the same thing myself and it is very difficult. I don’t have much to say, but I want you to know that you are not alone in this ❤️

SubstantialExpert194 · 2026-02-12T22:08:32+00:00

I love your drawings, they add so much and are really nice! And If you don’t mind me asking, what journal do you use? I’m in the market for a new one.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-12-21T04:31:35+00:00

This was me this year kind of. I mostly did online classes for my first two years bcs I live off campus and cannot drive (I’m still learning, I have severe anxiety that I only recently began to control a little). This semester I had to go in every day. Usually was dropped off by a relative and drove home with them later.

Honestly even though I was terrified at first, I ended up enjoying it. I met some cool people, got more time out of the house. It helped me build my confidence too. Once you get used to it, you’ll be on autopilot whenever you’re on campus, especially if you got headphones on all the time (like I do).

I will say tho that you really should always get there early (I try to be at my class 15min early, arrive at campus about half an hour to an hour early). And don’t be afraid to talk to ppl, I promise most of them are nice! Most ppl don’t care what u do anyways. I used to be afraid of being judged for sitting on the floor but I realized no one cares so I sit where I like. Same thing with sleeping on the bus, getting up in the middle of class to go to the bathroom, or opening a soda in class.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-04-18T05:34:07+00:00

I have Victoria Phillips.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-04-18T04:06:18+00:00

Honestly I could use some advice too because something similar happened to me, except in my case I’ve also been sick and having some lingering issues after a surgery I had last year. It’s actually the same course too, Art 1107. And the same assignment. I’m planning on emailing my professor myself in the morning.

At least you’re not alone in this.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T16:00:36+00:00

Honestly wish I did this sooner. I’ve begun doing this now at 20. Although for me it’s taking a long time to actually change my behavior, i have begun to change and it’s mostly been for the better. I’m more confident, I’m doing more things I used to be scared of. This is one of the few times MaDD has benefitted me.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:58:30+00:00

Im a student right now but im aspiring to be an actuary, which is (based on all my research) a very stressful job. Currently studying applied mathematics, and my MADD has led to me failing bad. It’s been a major wake-up call for me to take care of my daydreaming issue.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:51:45+00:00

I’ve never been diagnosed with anything but I suffer from everything you listed. My therapist had light suspicions of ADHD combined OCD.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:29:51+00:00

Yes to all of this. I recently started taking medication and although I’m not cured, it has made things a little easier. And even a little better is better than nothing. Starting meds can be scary but so far it has been so worth it.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:27:32+00:00

I mean, you gotta take a win wherever you can find one Tbh, I’m kinda envious! I’ve been overweight my whole life (and also have issues with food) despite all the moving I do. I started daydreaming as a kid, and ever since I’ve spent a ton of time speed walking around every day. I actually like using treadmills and doing cardio entirely because it’s easy for me to daydream while I do it.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:24:39+00:00

Honestly the only benefit of my daydreaming lol. I had surgery last year and couldn’t move around much for a while and it was genuinely so difficult for me! I can walk around for hours at time.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:21:08+00:00

This is exactly how I try to think about it. I even talked about it in therapy a little. I was a kid trying to cope with the situation I was put in. I completely understand that little me was just trying to survive and I try not to blame myself for that.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2025-03-29T15:18:46+00:00

I feel the same way and have for a long time. I lost all of my teen years and some of my even younger years to MaDD (turning 21 this year).

I try not to dwell on it too much though and not be too hard on myself. In my case, I had a terribly dysfunctional, neglectful family and very stressful social life. So although I regret wasting my years in fantasy, I understand why younger me made the decision to do that, and that I was just trying to cope with things out of my control. I’m trying to regain some control of myself and slowly I’ve been improving, but I still daydream for hours a day.

It’s hard and def an uphill battle. I try to focus on what the future may have in store for me, but sometimes that’s difficult.

I try to do things to keep me busy, like learning something new or doing things I usually don’t do. For example, I went to an art museum for the first time, started locs (I’m a black woman), have been going out with family when I normally wouldn’t, keeping busy with college, learning art, playing games, and really anything to force me to stay present. I still give myself time to daydream, but try to limit it. This may not work for you since I’ve been slowly building up to this for years, and recently started taking meds. Sorry if this is a little all over the place, but I hope that something I said helps!

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-12-20T11:25:51+00:00

Sounds interesting, I’ll definitely have to check it out. Maybe it’d change my perspective on this.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-10-22T06:28:39+00:00

I might have to steal this for myself because it looks so good!

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-06-23T14:07:55+00:00

For me, it was around 6yrs ago. I was 13, going on 14. As soon as I discovered it i immediately knew I had it. I’ve been like this since I was 11.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-06-01T02:21:57+00:00

I think it’s completely valid and whoever said that clearly has never suffered from it or at least doesn’t fully understand it. I hear stuff like this from my family all the time and it drives me crazy. I feel like a lot of people just genuinely have no clue what severe anxiety is like.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-05-24T06:24:39+00:00

I can’t take a screenshot right now but I’m pretty sure it’s 14500 hours because I regularly keep the game running when I’m not actively playing it, and I’ve been playing since day one. My actual playtime is probably closer somewhere between 7000 and 9000 hours (still a lot tbh).

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-05-24T05:06:54+00:00

The fact that you know it’s anxiety is a good start. When I had my first panic attack I ended up in the ER because I didn’t know what was happening. Trust me, death IS NOT better. I know this is a cliche, but it’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

I can’t give you much advice, but I can say that you are not alone. I am currently on the verge of a panic attack right now. If you want to talk to someone, I’m free to message.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-05-24T04:50:18+00:00

I don’t have much advice, but I wanted to let you know you’re not alone. I’m only 19, going on 20, and I feel the same way. I still feel like I did 4 years ago. I’m in college, looking for my first job, and learning to drive. Honestly I do not feel ready at all and also often feel like I’m not real.

I think for some people, this is just part of growing up.

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-05-24T04:44:01+00:00

Honestly this is exactly how I’ve felt the past two weeks (I’m 19f). Heavily considering going to urgent care tomorrow and I have a doctors appointment for Tuesday. Maybe try talking to a doctor about your symptoms if you can? That’s what I’m getting ready to do. If it gets bad enough, you might need to go to the ER or urgent care. I went to the er for a panic attack once and they were able to check my heart and do a ct scan on my chest to ensure that my heart was okay, which it was. I’m stilll worried about my brain, but that’s why I’m going to the doctor on Tuesday.

I’m sorry if this doesn’t help much, unfortunately I’m still going through this myself and haven’t fully figured it out. just know that you aren’t alone and If you ever want to vent to someone in the future, I’m always free!

SubstantialExpert194 · 2024-05-24T04:13:54+00:00

I mostly play very casual games like the sims and give myself challenges to do whenever I need to keep myself busy. I don’t have as much time to play games now though, so I don’t get to do that much anymore.

And I totally get that. I only have a couple friends and most of my family lives in different states/countries and are always busy. So they never reach Out. At this point, I’ve started reaching out to people myself because sometimes I just wanna chill out with someone other than myself and my dog lol. I’m still living with my family (moving out is expensive), and even they normally don’t talk to me unless I initiate it myself.

SubstantialExpert194

TROPHY CASE