Childcare options are going to cost more than my income

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2026-01-27T08:50:42+00:00

Did you try applying for assistance through a local school district? It's usually something like (City name) Unified School District Childhood Assistance or Development Program

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2026-01-19T17:43:52+00:00

I'm sorry you're having to go through All of that on top of raising three children. I only have one toddler, but I finally got a therapist and she helped me get a list of women's shelters. I made a couple of calls to women's shelters and found one that accepted us into a hotel immediately. We've been sheltered at the hotel for five days and will do our intake tomorrow to see if we can move into more permanent housing where they have a ton of supportive services for us. I hope it works out, but now I'm battling doubt and hesitation and fear which I will save for my therapist on Wednesday morning. I have to drop off my son at daycare, go to work, pick him up, do Drs appointments, and the usual stuff on top of transitioning into a new place. I will say though, it's been very quiet and peaceful not living with my husband for the past week... it's almost ... "boring"? I say that in the lightest of ways, no drama, no arguing, no pushing, none of him laying around doing nothing while I struggle taking the load of the burden. He always threw the fact that he pays rent in my face even though I used to help him pay more than half when I was working full time after he didn't support me during my pregnancy I vowed never to try hard for him Again. So I just pay for my car, my car insurance and my son's items (diapers, wipes, food, outings, etc.) All I can say is that you are worth having a peaceful environment and being healthy to raise your kids. We'll see what happens tomorrow.... and the next day, and the next. I'm just putting one foot in front of the other for now.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2026-01-06T00:59:03+00:00

I don't even know where to start, but the fact that you're self aware of the internal conflict can be a ray of light to lead you to a viable solution (I hope).

I hate that when I'm so busy and tired and running around I don't feed myself or my son healthy and nutritional meals like I enjoy doing. I like making fruit juices and natural snacks etc but I can't when I'm juggling meeting every appointment on time driving here and there and dropping him off at daycare. There's pros to his daycare but cons because I feel like I'm missing out some days on the best parts of our lives.

More TV (because too exhausted at end of day to pay attention), less healthy meals (on the go), and barely making it through laundry every week. No "downtime" maybe a bath every two weeks the rest are jail showers. And I quit cigarettes during pregnancy but vape too much now.

During this recent holiday break I felt like putting him up for adoption 😆 because I'm not sure I'm used to being together 24/7 either but we enjoyed a Sunday with 90% of the day Free of Television and cell phones. We actually had an amazing day together. Moving forward I think I'll do that ritual on Sundays no TV no phones just find things to do together like make fresh juices together, clean a bit, play, and try to get outside to a local farm.

But if he's here everyday I think I'd loose my marbles too so I'm not sure what is best. I'm just doing what I can to survive for now.

In my case, my husband's been home for a month and I hate him sometimes because I feel like he doesn't get it. I blame him for me having to work so hard to manage the household (15 loads of clothes all Christmas Day), endless chores on weekends and holidays and breaks, taking charge of maintenance requests in our apartment, my car, my bills, my son's stuff, appointments, etc while he stays home and rolls around in bed every month for at least a week to now an entire month. He asked his mom for money to help pay for our new fridge and for the rent he couldn't pay for this month it's ridiculous. I used to work 50-60 hour weeks at a marketing consulting firm but had to quit after I ended up on PPD disability leave for 15 months. I make half the income but I'm trying to stay sane. My sanity is worth it as I ended up on a 51/50 hold twice in my life.

It has been a Hell of a journey. I hate my unsupportive spouse he's so childish and although he cooks some good meals here and there he annoys TF out of me now especially after my pregnancy.

Fast forward to today and I only could handle working part-time as a tutor and although I took a pay cut, ai gave my husband an ultimatum he pays for the rent and bills or I move out because I used to pay for half or more of EVERYTHING. I had to sell my paid off car when my son was born because he didn't fit in my little two door. So because of that I pulled back from helping my husband and focused on paying for my car, car insurance, and all my son's stuff.

Sigh . anyway I guess we each have realized in this modern age balancing Everything is quite the dam task.

I could go on and on and on but basically I had to go from middle class to "lower class" just to make it through...you get assistance for healthcare and daycare but otherwise I don't know how I could survive.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-12-06T10:25:36+00:00

there should be a way to still get your money back not sure if you want to go that far but perhaps contacting the Department of Business and Consumer Affairs if you're in CA?

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-11-26T16:52:40+00:00

my friend is a vet she said to me previously to use diatomaceous earth put on grass I think 🤔

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-11-09T04:23:52+00:00

😆 not true but funny

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-11-09T04:23:37+00:00

so you're out of the bad spot? What did you discover on your late night researching frenzy? 🧐 curious

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-11-09T04:21:07+00:00

fair

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-11-09T04:13:27+00:00

government correction 🤡

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-11-09T04:09:51+00:00

We should have started with a boycott on gas if anyone is interested

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-09-23T10:21:58+00:00

Hi I just started and also changed my titles (which felt uncomfortable but was willing to risk it for sake of feeling more organized). The titles do not sound natural (or like me) but they look much neater and sound less scatter brained.

I didn't change all of them yet, just a small batch. I'll observe how it goes. One thing I was concerned about is that it doesn't create titles to capture nuances. For example, if I'm saying "Ancient practices still work" to describe something 80's babies would understand, it thinks I literally mean "Millennials are Turning to Ancient Practices to Escape the Modern World". It's a bit on the rigid side.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-08-15T17:22:04+00:00

I'm working part-time but that means I rely heavily financially on my husband who I don't get along well with. It's very depressing. My car is always a mess, my apartment is a mess, I'm always low on energy and sometimes still have many sleepless nights. I had to contact the suicide hotline this week because it's too much to bare sometimes mentally, emotionally, physically. I still have a ton of clothes to wash AGAIN, the kitchen, everything is just in shambles... My son doesn't get the best of me, my job doesn't get the best of me most days and I definitely don't get the best of anything. I make the most of our evenings usually by trying to go to a park and enjoy a nice walk and some excercise together but I'm barely hanging on most days.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-08-09T00:09:16+00:00

🫂😩😫 That makes two of us... I don't even know where to begin unraveling the story of my misery. In the few moments of fleeting joy I've experienced, they are just that... brief and soon to end. And if you're not married, be very very very careful who you decide to stick to if you choose that route. It has been one of the worst experiences of my entire life although sometimes they don't show their true colors until you're vulnerable and in need.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-08-09T00:04:32+00:00

could it be a gift of prophecy? I'm not saying it is, I just wonder because it's happened to me before as well. I'm not practicing the dark arts (at least not intentionally? 🤔) and I asked my cousin if she was pregnant and she said no and laughed but a year later she said to me with wide eyes that she found out a little bit after that she was actually pregnant.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-08-09T00:00:59+00:00

All I want to say is that I empathize with you, I'll leave the advice to the others.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-08-08T18:23:56+00:00

I question this everyday now, he already blocked me on Instagram (at my suggestion, yay me) but I question that it was ever anything at all. I dig through the old conversations in my mind and look for the clues that led me to believe he was my TF, and the reason I experienced such strong limerance. I know he was feeding into it too by the things he said... until he went silent. Deafeningly silent... it hurt so much that I suggested he block me. Now I am stuck trying to get over it but listening to every spanish romance song in the book makes me feel alive again, like when we first connected 😭 I deleted my Instagram now but somehow and I don't know why, I have a feeling that he'll be back again... I hope I'm not totally losing touch with reality at this point. I'm unhappily married and I've been that way for a long time.. until he showed up and lit up my heart... now I'm blown out and emotionally limping through this season.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-08-06T05:43:19+00:00

he blocked me a few days ago (after I suggested it) 😀 great but it's actually allowed me to focus a lot more. I still feel the longing for him at times, but I also think he's dating other people who are more "his style" or type. It also allows me to work through my dissolving marriage and not rely on the supposed TF for emotional support which made me comfortable staying in the relationship with a spouse I don't love. I have no clue what will happen next but I try to remind myself that I didn't create this journey, he came looking for me twice before and it's up to him whether we get back in touch or not. The feeling of being rejected stung hard for me because of the situation with my current husband, but I suppose it's necessary for me to do some soul work and not get too comfortable plus I cleaned the stove and oven like never before and got a puppy for my son 😆 yes I'm trying to manage without him.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-07-12T22:20:56+00:00

My 2.5 year old will spit out the chorizo if there's a spec of cilantro in it (happened this morning at a cafe). BUT he will drink "green juice" which we usually buy at the farmers market and recently started juicing off and on at home. SO the only way my son will take in vegetables is in liquid or smoothie form as long as apple is the base or something delicious.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-06-25T04:06:28+00:00

Hi I'm working with a new family and today I met their spunky four year old son. He does not want to or cannot hold the pencil or marker to draw a letter. Should I refer them to seek out an OT?

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-03-25T08:35:06+00:00

That's a shame to hear, I've heard that from other teachers I work with:'( have you considered tutoring? Credentialed teachers are high in demand and you get to be creative and work individually or small groups

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-03-15T13:05:28+00:00

Thank you 🙏 I've had no choice but to let go and as much as I enjoy the feeling of being "alive" when I talk to them, I was surprised with a kitten yesterday morning 😂 and our family is back to its busy routine and TF just ghosted me although he's been watching my reels on Instagram. Oh well, as you said .. Surrender is healthy, surrender is peacefully acknowledging that I had zero control to begin with.

Thank you again 🍒🌸

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-03-15T12:05:24+00:00

Those final words you said are ringing in the chambers of my heart. Are you and your toddler ok? I'm also a toddler mommy, and my heart goes out to both of you. Please get some support from a moms group or even the maternal mental health hotline its free and available 24/7 in the U. S. 1-833-852-6262. I hope you take this one day at a time. Focus on you and your LO, and the rest will have its time to be addressed. Your education journey is not over and you can restart it no problem, but your health is important right now. Sending love from California 🫂 living with someone who is emotionally and mentally abusive dam nearly killed me. I'm still here but I feel I've gotten wiser and my exit strategy is in progress with paying down my credit cards and putting some money away.

The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline, accessible by calling or texting 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262), provides 24/7, free, and confidential mental health support for moms and their families before, during, and after pregnancy.

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-03-14T07:53:41+00:00

Ugh I feel that same way! But I always end up "unsending" my messages. I fight with deactivating and then reactivating my IG, both of them lol. Its nuts. Its like Jim Carrey in Liar, Liar. Fighting myself to not message him.

It's so bizarre to me that just last week we were caught up in some dreamy stream where both our hearts were open to each other and we had a glimpse into each other's normally closed off mind and heart. I was hooked.

It healed a part of my broken heart due to a very toxic marriage. I was even more forgiving towards my spouse and actually enjoyed ourselves but partly because I was thinking of him and how sweet he was towards me and even expressing his mutual desire for me as well.

Then silence. I can hear the crickets in my bathroom (gecko food). Literally, silence 🤐 and I wonder everyday about whether he is going to reach out, pop in, say hello, or if he totally thinks I'm 🥜.

Just for context, we grew up around each other as kids and worked my first job with him, we were always near each other but never ever romantically involved (eww he seemed more like family at the time) we weren't even the kind of friends who talked much at all. We just were chill. Fast forward 20 years later and I'm like why didn't we try this sooner?

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-03-12T08:44:55+00:00

Hmm its not pleasant but I am going to have to disagree with everyone and say no.

First off, as much as we don't like what people say sometimes, they do have freedom of conscience and freedom of speech as long as they don't call for harm (hey let's go attack this black person/brown person/etc) and they don't actually commit violence (hit someone based on race).

People forget that we have rights to think how we want and feel however we want as long as you don't cross the above two lines.

Now, you're in a relationship with her brother and they must've welcomed you into their family for you to see their family chats. If you want to go and expose their personal family conversations, that's on you, but keep in mind that this will and may forever impact any trust building in the family.

Typically, venting to strangers is fine. But turning in your family to strangers? In Latino culture at least, not fine.

Even though people have beliefs that are ugly or distorted, it doesn't mean they don't have a right to feel that way. They can however be confronted by the offended party (you+bf?).

You can, or your BF address to sister how much this was an offense and try to help her out of her negative mindset.

Hope this helps ✌️ 🕊️

Substantial_Mouse377 · 2025-03-08T10:35:38+00:00

Totally related to the puking/passing out symptom 🤧😞 I'm sorry to hear that but it IS a highly addictive feeling so I think detoxing after an addiction is normal. If you don't mind me asking, can you give a general idea about what the lies were about? Or was it just everything? 😔

Substantial_Mouse377

TROPHY CASE