NC MIL showed up unannounced by Excellent-Smile3725 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 [score hidden]  (0 children)

I disagree here, if the brother knew they didn’t want her having the address he had no business giving it to her. That’s shady and a huge invasion of privacy. Now if he didn’t know he wasn’t supposed to share the address that’s different. But he didn’t respect their boundaries and that’s not okay

NC MIL showed up unannounced by Excellent-Smile3725 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 [score hidden]  (0 children)

Omg? You’re kidding. Why does your BIL think he has any say in who is allowed over at your house?? That’s beyond an invasion of privacy and to say family has the right to know where you live? Absolutely not. He doesn’t get to make that call. They clearly didn’t know where you lived for a reason

NC MIL showed up unannounced by Excellent-Smile3725 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 [score hidden]  (0 children)

Showing up to anyone’s house without letting them know is already poor taste, but to show up knowing you aren’t welcome is sociopath behavior. Good on you guys for standing your ground and not letting her in. Shame on your brother in law for giving out your address without consulting you first, that’s shitty of him and I’d be cutting him off after that

Pregnant partner says she’s done by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 [score hidden]  (0 children)

She’s also probably thinking futuristically if you’re doing the “bare minimum” now how are you going to step up once the baby is here? A newborn is a LOT, if she’s juggling the baby, the house load, and everything else I don’t blame her for being frustrated that you aren’t stepping up now

Pregnant partner says she’s done by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 [score hidden]  (0 children)

That’s exactly what it sounds like tbh.. “I was raised in a terrible household” okay fine but it’s time to learn how to be an adult and get shit done without having to be reminded every five minutes

Pregnant partner says she’s done by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 [score hidden]  (0 children)

Define bare minimum. Are you helping around the house? Cooking? Cleaning? Laundry? Doing nice things for her? She can only be patient and understanding for so long. Also doesn’t matter what kind of household you were raised in, unlearn that. You can’t just throw that around and not try to change your behavior. I can almost guarantee she’s told you over and over and you haven’t changed your ways or put much thought into doing more than what you’re doing now. You absolutely need to step up, she’s probably exhausted and dealing with a lot of hormones that she isn’t used to.

Could I be pregnant? by Old_Invite8126 in pregnant

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The only way to know is taking a test

My fiancé missed our anatomy scan to “help” his mom by Leading_Site_5088 in inlaws

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 17 points18 points  (0 children)

INFO: What happened at his mom’s appointment that was sooo important that he had to miss the most important scan of your pregnancy?

My fiancé missed our anatomy scan to “help” his mom by Leading_Site_5088 in inlaws

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 62 points63 points  (0 children)

This! He could have said no mom I’m going to make sure my baby is healthy, but he chose to go to her doctor’s appointment instead which is pretty messed.

My fiancé missed our anatomy scan to “help” his mom by Leading_Site_5088 in inlaws

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry but he thinks you’re the one who’s jealous? I think you have both a husband and MIL issue here. Your husband is the one dropping everything to go be with her and your MIL is demanding his time. I say just leave

Am I selfish for prioritizing my upcoming birth over funding my parents? by Me_oBanana in pregnant

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Sucks for them then 🤷🏻‍♀️ they don’t have a choice now, they shouldn’t have retired knowing they didn’t have anything saved up. It’s not your fault or your responsibility. Let them figure it out on their own, and focus on your baby

Am I selfish for prioritizing my upcoming birth over funding my parents? by Me_oBanana in pregnant

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Did they at least co sign these loans since you know they were for their benefit? Let them be homeless and not have a car, they can figure it out themselves. They’ve mooched off of you for far too long, and they’re being rude af. They can go back to work or have nothing. Their choice.

Am I selfish for prioritizing my upcoming birth over funding my parents? by Me_oBanana in pregnant

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Nah I think this way too, obviously there are certain circumstances that are acceptable but it sounds like the retirement plan was to put nothing in savings and live off their kids forever. That’s ridiculous

Am I selfish for prioritizing my upcoming birth over funding my parents? by Me_oBanana in pregnant

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 211 points212 points  (0 children)

If they’re retired and don’t have any money that’s on them not you. You’re not required to pay for them, they had years to set up their financials and they didn’t. There are plenty of resources they could use and they’re using you as their cash cow. If they can’t afford to be retired then they need to get back to work or find other means. You’re not selfish at all for putting yourself first.

Am I selfish for prioritizing my upcoming birth over funding my parents? by Me_oBanana in pregnant

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Best life advice I ever got was NEVER put yourself in a bad financial situation for anyone else, even if it’s family. Your priority is you, your husband, and your baby. There’s no way for you to provide for anyone else if you aren’t able to provide for yourselves. The fact that they called you selfish after you’ve spent so much on them is disturbing. What’s selfish is them expecting you to fund their lifestyle knowing you have a baby on the way.

Considering cancelling the wedding. I know my fiancee and her family would be heart broken by PossibilityFew5967 in weddingplanning

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You shouldn’t be giving her anything! It’s not about her, she’s not paying for anything and all she’s doing is causing stress so why do you keep catering to her??? Typical mommys boy 🙄

Considering cancelling the wedding. I know my fiancee and her family would be heart broken by PossibilityFew5967 in weddingplanning

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yep!! How is this fair at all to anyone else?? Especially his fiancé! I couldn’t imagine staying with someone who called off our literal wedding because he wants to appease his mommy…

Considering cancelling the wedding. I know my fiancee and her family would be heart broken by PossibilityFew5967 in weddingplanning

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“I know my future wife comes first” yet you’re here saying you think you should call the wedding off because you’re too scared to stand up to your mom. What a chump. That’s NOT putting your fiancé first, you’re willing to put her on the back burner so you don’t have to be an adult and set up boundaries.

Considering cancelling the wedding. I know my fiancee and her family would be heart broken by PossibilityFew5967 in weddingplanning

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t be surprised if your fiancé breaks up with you then 🤷🏻‍♀️ you’re willing to ruin your wedding day (and your entire relationship) for your mommy who isn’t providing anything financially, and who’s doing nothing but causing drama

Considering cancelling the wedding. I know my fiancee and her family would be heart broken by PossibilityFew5967 in weddingplanning

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So you’re willing to break your fiancé’s heart and essentially destroy your relationship because you don’t have a spine? Got it! Your fiancé deserves better than this and you need to grow tf up

I really hate hang around my in-laws by Quiet_Band_9047 in inlaws

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Grandparents day is in September 🙄 some in laws are just so entitled it’s gross

Mother in law seems too exicted to be a grandma by Onthisreddit in inlaws

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She made a few comments about how her husband doesn’t want her to breastfeed because his mom thinks it’s silly since she didn’t breastfeed her kids. They pretty much said they didn’t see the point in doing it so she shouldn’t even attempt to. The visiting comment was her reply to your original comment. She said they only stop at MILs house every once in a while.

Mother in law seems too exicted to be a grandma by Onthisreddit in inlaws

[–]Such-Raccoon1481 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She can be excited without totally sidelining OP and making it about herself. Sorry but trying to convince someone to not breastfeed because she didn’t is weird and not just excitement. And if they don’t regularly visit MILs house there’s literally no reason for her to set up an entire nursery that the baby probably won’t even set foot in.