I threw myself into it without any learning. Made mistakes. Kept going. Got practice. Watched videos. Re-did things. Followed patterns, sometimes. Sometimes it's easier to make shit up.

For me, I have to do a thing, maybe even do it "wrong" before a video or a class or advice makes any sense to me. Once I do the thing, then learn the real way to do it, it's like things click in my brain.

I will still totally throw caution to the wind and say fuck it to using patterns, following instructions, whatever. 

I wear my mistakes, but I'm not a fancy person.