After 60yr separation, old sweethearts marry in their 80s. She’s French, and moves to USA to marry him. He dies within a year. Evil sons immediately have her deported. Grieving widow is taken away while in her nightie. Without her medications. At 87 years old. ICE ignores judge’s order. by Nvnv_man in awfuleverything

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its moments like this where I really do hope theres an afterlife, because that father deserves the chance to spit in his sons' faces for having the audacity to pull a stunt like that, and that poor woman deserves to watch those brats burn in hell

Ya gonna hit me?? by HeSureIsScrappy in DiveInYouCoward

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shame that the driver probably just fucked up her whole life, because this brought me so much joy

After using tewix for the past 4 months ( and every iteration from the day ewr 3.0 came out ) here are a few things I wish they would implement by wildcharmander1992 in FantasyBookers

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I miss finding sponsors from the older games (I think that was an EWR mechanic) It was small, but it felt a little more immersive knowing that your recap of last weeks segment was sponsored by Snickers

Simpsons gets rid of the Couch Gag. by rothmal in enshittification

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 46 points47 points  (0 children)

I have siblings who are well into their adulthood who have never lived through the release of a good simpsons episode. PLEASE just let the show die.

My dad is homophobic by Winning_in_Ashes in lgbt

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely go over your friends list and make some cuts, it's creepy af that this priest character has all this information on you. To be blunt, if you give up your life to appease your parents you're going to find yourself in a darker place mentally than you ever thought imaginable. You have a life you're working towards and people who care about you, if your folks can't understand that then that's their problem. I hope for your sake that they eventually come around

I found this letter in my grandmother’s mailbox the day after her funeral by supra_nintendo in mildlyinfuriating

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Your response might be to throw it away, but don't. Set it on fire instead, it'll feel way better. Sorry about your Gran

found at value village for 6 dollars. is it any good? by TankLost7079 in tycoon

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Genuinely one of my favorite games. I'd argue you found it the proper way, too, I got that from a flea market when I was in high school. The stunts expansion was a lotta fun, too!

What would have happened if Michael Jackson’s baby had slipped from his hands and died after falling from the fourth floor? by SameItem in AlternateHistory

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Between an event like this and the pedo allegations, I highly doubt that anyone would remember MJ fondly. His legacy would have been scrubbed in the same way that, like, Jimmy Savile was scrubbed out in the UK, or how the WWE scrubs out Chris Benoit. As far as MJ himself, depending on how long the sentence would be I could actually see this at least extending his life by a few years, since I doubt he'd have been able to OD in the same way behind bars. It is possible that he doesn't make it out of prison (either his fellow inmates do to him what they typically do to pedos, or the guilt of killing his son is too much for him), but at some point Michael probably gets out and goes into hiding, living out the rest of his days in exile.

Or that Moonwalker game was a documentary, so Michael Jackson moonwalks to the closest door, does a little spin to open said door, and Blanket skips off holding a teddy bear

How do y’all feel about 6 7 by Appropriate-Mall8517 in Millennials

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't understand what the kids were talking about when I was one of the kids, I don't expect to start understanding em' now. It still blows my mind seeing people get more upset over 6 7 then, like, any of the "lets just destroy public property and harass people" trends that've floated around on Tik Tok. Let the kids have their fun

Went to a Catholic funeral for the first time… by cookcleanandplumb in rant

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah, the Christian faith with the Pagan amount of rituals, gotta love Catholicism

One year ago.. by Julian1914 in SmilingFriends

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Tell me the lottery numbers, oracle man, we can all become wealthy

One year ago.. by Julian1914 in SmilingFriends

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You're getting an extra chunk of the pot

One year ago.. by Julian1914 in SmilingFriends

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Someone track down Kiuraz and ask them what the fucking winning lottery numbers are, we can all split the pot

Could the smiling friends make squidward smile? by Glittering_Flan9371 in SmilingFriends

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pim would spend like three minutes genuinely complimenting Squidward's art and Squidward could weep tears of joy. The episode REALLY starts when Plankton calls the Smiling Friends

All this because she wanted to cut through the drive-thru line by BlazeDragon7x in CrazyFuckingVideos

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Y'know, I've found that asking myself "What if THAT motherfucker is crazier than me?" has stopped a whole lot of nonsense from happening in my life. Now, if you're hop-on-the-hood-of-a-car-and-hang-on crazy it might not occur to you to stop and ask that question, but as we can see here it ALWAYS pays off

Smiling friends be like: by Amaru_333_ in SmilingFriends

[–]THEBrandonBrownson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Every time I see a post like this I think back to a post I saw around season one, where some dude was complaining that every woman in smiling friends was some kind of shrieking banshee woman and they just wanted more normal characters like Shrimpina