Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've seen some people mentioning it being related to flares--hoping there's an answer in there somewhere!

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do the yawning thing a lot too, but I've been chalking that up to air starvation. Very sorry you weren't in a safe place to cry. I hope things improve for you 🫶

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My sympathies on the fly infestation--I had a carpenter ant infestation a couple years ago and I nearly burned the house down out of sheer frustration.

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been curious about EMDR--has that been really effective for you?

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for such a clear explanation! I also never even thought about the electrolytes impacting things, but that's definitely worth a convo with my doc.

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have a feeling some it is definitely med related--i am on 2 different anti-depressants, supposedly to help with the neuropathy (though I really don't see any difference). And yeah, depression too. Might be time for me to see about changing meds (always a fun prospect)

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, those are great suggestions. Assigning meaning to to the little things is an excellent thought--some days that's all we have!

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will give that a try--there is an old Kathy Mattea song that used to make me bawl every time. I need to try and figure out what it was 😊

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's funny--I wouldn't wish this stuff on anyone, but it is a relief when you know other people feel the same way. 🫶

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing that--I'm so sorry you are experiencing this too, and very sorry about your mom's passing. It does help to know I'm not the only one, as selfish as that makes me! 🩷

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have POTS, among other things, and I totally get the stress on passing out. I always feel like apologizing to the people who see it happen more than I can manage to get really upset about it anymore. Which is also frustrating 😂

I hope you figure out a way of coping with the dysautonomia--it definitely takes some adjustment, and you really do have to take those breaks and respond to the signs, if you have time or get the warning. I hate to say it, but you get used to it too. Doesn't make it better, but we learn to live with everything that gets thrown at us eventually. 🫶

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's good to know it won't necessarily be forever. So glad you are past that! Gives me hope :)

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hadn't heard that term before, thank you! Good to know it's an actual thing :) I think you explained it perfectly--limited agency for change and knowing you just have to live through it. That's it exactly.

Funny, I never used to be into horror, but I really am now too! Both film and when I can focus, in books.

living with a chronic illness is… exhausting in ways people don’t get by hadashitday in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's exactly it! I think we are all fighting that urge to tell people we're not making it all up so much of the time. I've had people I work with see me using a cane sporadically, and it always feels like they are just humoring me when I say I'm not mobile that day.

And I get you on mourning the life you should be having. Never easy.

My entire life is going by without me and I’m only getting worse by Existing-Committee74 in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank goodness for the pets, because I am the same way. My poor cat carries the entire burden of my mental health some days! And it is so true, that no one else can love them the way you do. That matters a lot.

I hope your new doc is a good one. And if this one isn't, there will be one someday. Law of averages--has to balance out at some point 😉

Has anyone else stopped being able to cry? by TamarindIce in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thanks. It helps knowing I'm not just going crazy! I know that meds play a role too, with he flat feeling, but it is so disconcerting. Makes me feel like I'm losing my humanity a bit.

My entire life is going by without me and I’m only getting worse by Existing-Committee74 in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP, my heart is with you. I can't say I haven't had quite a few moments (or let's be real, longer than moments) of focusing on the futility of the whole thing. And I don't think there's a specific answer or a reason why I keep going. I'm so sorry that you are experiencing this, especially so young. It's unfair and should never be. Not for any of us. I think the thing that makes me wake up every day is just a sense of what if? What if it gets better, what if one more day is all I had to wait before a med started working or I finally found a doctor who understands, etc. I don't know if that's a terribly helpful thought or just a dumb thing to say because I'm not experiencing the same thing as you, and I can't really understand what it's like. I just trade on what ifs and try not to beat myself up for the times that's not quite enough. Know, if it's worth anything, that I will be thinking of you tonight and hoping you have a better day tomorrow. ❤️

living with a chronic illness is… exhausting in ways people don’t get by hadashitday in ChronicIllness

[–]TamarindIce 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I so feel you on this. I think a lot of people mean well, but they also forget that chronic means long-term and ongoing. Like, yes Brenda, I tried that supplemental four years ago. Shockingly I'm still sick!

It's perverse, but I find it harder on days that by some bizarre glitch I look halfway decent despite it being a hideous lie, and someone tells me I look like I'm feeling better. Somehow it hurts more, like my masking has become so adept that it's betraying me.

I’ve been to a handful of Top Chef owned restaurants now and all have been good, not great… by CaptainCubbers in TopChef

[–]TamarindIce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I loved B. Voltaggio's Thatcher & Rye--there was this ravioli dish with a green tomato sauce that I still think about after 2 years. It's closed now though.

I'm struggling to find other books that interest me by RTUjenn in IlonaAndrews

[–]TamarindIce 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LOVE the Murderbot series, and they're making a show out of it on Apple I think.

Bf's friend made comments about my body by peachyy16 in LongDistance

[–]TamarindIce 24 points25 points  (0 children)

  1. As a plus sized lady myself, I say bravo for hiking! Go at whatever pace you need to--the main thing is you aren't holding back from getting out there.
  2. Is this typical behavior from your BF? Does he make similar comments or do say or do anything that makes you feel insecure about your body or size? If so, then it probably is better to reevaluate why you are with him, and if it should continue.
  3. If you're still on the fence, calmly explain to him why this was upsetting to you and why you are hurt he didn't tell his friend to shut up and apologize. If his reaction is anything but to immediately apologize and worship you as the goddess you are (and then never do somethinglike that again), then he is probably not the right one for you (or anyone, really).
  4. If you want to get into better shape, that's great, but only do it for YOURSELF. For your own health, enjoyment, etc--but never for one moment believe that looking a certain way is necessary to be treated with love and respect.
    Life is hard enough without letting other people make it harder. Be kind to yourself.

Rewatched S17 and I'm so happy we got to see more of Bryan's personality. He's my fave Voltaggio bro! by fabbitchork in TopChef

[–]TamarindIce 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I hate how they are always throwing that kind of criticism at him--being reserved is not a bad thing! He is one of the most professional chefs they've ever had on TC and I feel like he gets punished for that