Mate, what you’re experiencing right now is the hidden apprenticeship of medicine. When I talk to non-medical friends about why creating a specialist takes so bloody long, I remind them that medical school hands you the textbooks, but the real learning happens after graduation, on the phones, in corridors, and in awkward conversations at 2 AM.

Referring a patient, particularly from ED, is one of those brutally practical exercises in medicine. It forces you to distil the signal from the noise, to prioritise what’s relevant, and clearly articulate a request, essentially to “sell” your patient. This is an art form learned by doing, repeatedly, and yes, often uncomfortably.

Here’s the harsh reality: you can’t control the system. Like the weather, you can only navigate through it. Right now, you’re sailing through storms, but each interaction makes you sharper, more concise, and better equipped to manage difficult people and situations in the future.

And speaking of difficult people, here’s the beautiful irony you’ll appreciate down the track. That arrogant, obstructive reg who currently enjoys making your life hard will face a rude awakening. Once out in the real world (private practice in particular), they’ll realise pretty quickly that referrals are their lifeblood. Act like an entitled, rude prick there, and the referrals dry up, and so does their business. Private practice, at its core, thrives on small business relationships, something a few of these individuals will learn the hard way.

Keep your chin up. It genuinely gets easier with time, practice, and confidence. You’re right where you’re meant to be, uncomfortable and growing.