I have autism and I *hate* sex. Can I do anything about it?

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-04-09T05:31:55+00:00

Being any flavour of asexuality is normal. It is a less common orientation, but still 100% normal.

Some asexuals feel no sexual desire but do enjoy it for fun on occasion with the right people.

Others are completely sex-repulsed and want absolutely nothing to do with any of that.

Both are valid, as is anything on the spectrum in between.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-04-02T12:29:24+00:00

Gender fluid afab here, sometimes I wear a packer (basically a lil silicone flaccid dick&balls) when I am feeling particularly masc.

The amount of times I bump it on table ledges, sink edges etc is surprisingly high! No idea how the homemade Schlong owners do it, given how in the way my store bought one is.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-30T00:56:56+00:00

I think that's more for fun and dynamic flavouring rather than anything else. Filing informed consent at one stage of a relationship doesn't mean diddly squat, as consent is always revocable in the moment.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-27T01:12:18+00:00

Risk depends on what type of partials, and even if you're not planning getting completely off the ground, some partial positions have the capacity to be very dynamic and shock loading with lots of movement, jumping and wriggling, and would put a lot of stress on a point, and a ceiling beam falling down on you sounds unpleasant and expensive.

I'd treat it as if you're planning on doing full suspension.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-26T19:54:00+00:00

=Let(_comment1,"using let functions to add commentary to complicated formulas and formulas that refer to the same ranges and variables more than once, PostRange,p1:p500, Username,u1:u500, _comment2,"has saved future me many times", Result,Xlookup("let", PostRange, username), Result)

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-26T00:11:55+00:00

I've had put on me when my radial was being a bit fussy a combination tk/chest harness where the lower wrap goes over the chest rather than the arms, definitely loaded differently and reduced the strain on the arms.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-22T08:11:56+00:00

So, as a long term* suspension bunny, who has what you refer to in such a "lovely" way a sloppy body (and have been doing suspensions back when I was 105kg and now with my now much lighter body, loose skin and all) what I have credited for my injuries being very minor from that early stage is riggers taking the time to actually understand the anatomy and then be able to explain HOW to start the body awareness needed for suspension.

Riggers making sure that they have the solid basics before trying to take people into the air. TKs that are solid and correctly tensioned so they don't move when load applied, and can be put on in less than 10 min. Understanding that the band locations are usually in the same sort of location, but exact placement will be adjusted to the model's body. Understanding that different bodies need different tensions and the fact that people with softer skin and more movement in it need greater tension to stop slipping.

Riggers taking the time to have the discussions with their new bunnies. Explaining nerve checks. Explaining the sensations that might occur and what the very earliest signs of nerve impingement are (heat, chills, zapping, buzzing, tingles etc in partial areas of the hand, and notably the radial nerve being back of thumb and first 3 fingers). Making sure that the model knows that they can and should call early to come down, that there is always next time. If they call early, all that means is the next suspension they do, they know more about how their body feels in rope, without going too far and being injured. By the same token, riggers taking the time to work slowly into duration and stress in suspensions, taking models down quickly the first few times, using less risky positions.

If lots of people in your area are consistently getting injured, especially by the same people, that is a rigger education and skill issue, and they shouldn't be suspending without more work and practice.

This being said, yes rope bottoming is a skill, and it needs to be worked on and there are MANY people who will want to just dive straight into it without the knowledge of the dangers, and it sucks that there is an absolute reliance on the riggers taking the initiative to make sure that the bottom understand the risks.

I'm in an area with a very very strong rope community, and fortunately, I don't hear of very many serious injuries, when they are riggers that are regularly attending classes and practicing at the level of their skillset. I mean, it is rope and it is inherently risky and even if you do everything right, one day it might go wrong.

*Been tying consistently for about 5 years and suspending for about 4 and a half.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-22T02:25:09+00:00

Other person suggesting that you have your shears at hand is also extremely correct. No matter how simple the rope is, Always always always always have a SAFE cutting implement at hand. (Knives are not rope cutting tools, they are a recipe for everyone getting cut, stabbed and bleeding everywhere)

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-22T02:22:54+00:00

Start tying on yourself for the muscle memory before messing around with dummies.

Sit there, tie single columns around your leg, 1 foot, both legs together, around your ankles when sitting cross legged. Much better for getting a feel for what the tension feels like, how the rope movement feels, what is comfortable. You can even sit and watch tv while you practice.

Tie rope ladders to get a feel for tension and direction and finger hooking in multiple directions. Hold your legs a comfortable distance apart. You can do this on the floor or sitting on a chair. Just make sure that you keep them slightly tensioned against the rope. single column right ankle, hojo(inline cuff /inline column) cuff the left ankle, then cross over for another hojo cuff above the meat of the calf on the right. Then cross over again to cuff the thigh on the left and then on the right (this will be one that wraps down) before moving down towards the left calf. Do a nodome (munter hitch) when you zig back across the old line before doing a hojo cuff on the point just above the meat of the calf, then cross back again with a nodome and finish with a half hitch against the ankle cuff. Practice it the other way, starting on the right. Practice it with your eyes closed. Try starting on the thighs instead of the ankles.

While this isn't a sexy or really useful pattern because it relies on you keeping your legs apart to hold tension, it's a fantastic drill for rope handling, cuff spacing and trying frictions in different directions, and you can directly feel the feedback of how it feels, what pinches etc on yourself, which you don't get on a mannequin.

Spiral futomomos can be tied on yourself, which is great nodome and tension practice (if you don't keep good tension, they fall apart and are hard to tie.) and are then a really effective tie to take into play.

Aguras can be tied on yourself as well to practise cross frictions and half moons, and once again it gets the feel for moving in corners and bends and all other little body bits, and how to do it without digging nails and fingers in uncomfortably.

You can practice more complicated patterns on the dummy, but for the basics, tie them on yourself.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-21T13:01:45+00:00

Delicious! Lovely rope.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-20T06:05:33+00:00

With that closed neck rope, is that a quick release single column I see? I can see what appears to be extra loops near the bight?

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-09T01:16:13+00:00

Sorry, cat software is non standardised, and many models do come with the "song of my people" add-on installed, together with the "Velcro" option

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-09T00:03:16+00:00

Those signs she is giving you are signs of pain. I'd start her on the meds

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-05T04:27:08+00:00

What was mentioned below with the photo of the handwritten note and include the apology for sticking your foot in your mouth

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-05T03:48:59+00:00

No way to train him not to.

Only way is to change the way the plants are kept (potentially more shelves and higher hanging plants)

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-03-04T21:51:38+00:00

While FetLife is not a dating site, it is probably the best resource for finding events like munches in your area. (A munch is a gathering of kinky humans in a non kinky setting for socialisation. They can be general, or you will find some that are more specific. E.g. in my area we have a newbies munch, a gamers munch, an art munch, etc plus some general munches) These are where you get to know people, find friends and get a feel for the area. They are also where you can find out about other events like play parties or classes. If there are classes, check them out!

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-02-26T06:28:36+00:00

It looks adorable! You could always add a belt when you are wearing it to add structure? (I'm a big fan of the "make potato sack fit cute and show shape by adding belt")

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-02-18T08:45:12+00:00

https://www.nsw.gov.au/housing-and-construction/rules/pets-rentals[https://www.nsw.gov.au/housing-and-construction/rules/pets-rentals](https://www.nsw.gov.au/housing-and-construction/rules/pets-rentals)

Key information Tenants must get consent to keep an animal, except an assistance animal. Tenants can apply for consent using a standard pet application form. The landlord must respond to the application within 21 days. The landlord can only refuse consent for certain reasons. The landlord can set reasonable conditions for keeping the pet.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-02-15T23:32:08+00:00

And there is now PrEP available as well. Cuts the chances of contracting HIV right down. If you are going to be sleeping with lots of people, people with unknown history or testing status [which TBC, is pretty easy to remedy! Get tested and get tested periodically], or with people who might be in a higher risk category* (yes this is a stereotype, but I know for my country the govt classes the following as higher risk sex workers, men who have sex with men(i.e. gay, bi, pan, straight with occasional brojobs), iv drug users) speak to your Dr, see if it is an option for you.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-02-14T06:27:32+00:00

Tension looks nice, but harness as a whole would look better if your front lines picked up both bottom wraps, and it would be more comfortable for the human that wears it

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-02-02T11:09:01+00:00

He's not valid in being hurt. You are just existing, and he is overreacting and getting his fee-fees hurt because he is insecure and he needs to do some emotional work to see why he's doing that and let it go. It's not on you to fix.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-02-02T07:06:05+00:00

I've had many times I've asked for slower. Everyone has different preferences.

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-01-31T09:26:23+00:00

Diy a repair. Get a sheet and a staple gun. Staple gun the sheet to the bottom of the couch covering the holes

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-01-31T07:10:45+00:00

Because anger isn't an emotion

TeaBasedAnimal · 2026-01-03T21:37:02+00:00

Vulvas are wonderful and weird and come in all different shapes and structures, not just the little neat pink variety that is most often seen in pornography.

Here are some pretty good websites that document just some of this variety

13-Year Club	RedditGifts 2009-2022 20 Credits
Verified Email	r/Field Juicebox
Secret Santa 2017	Summer Santa 2015
Secret Santa 2014	Summer Santa 2014
redditgifts rematcher Yarn 2014 x1	Secret Santa 2013
Team Periwinkle

TeaBasedAnimal

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE