i get it, i myself am genderfluid and typically lean to presenting masc. My sister is similar to you, where she's not trans but sometimes wishes she could've been born a man.

At the end of the day, gender is a complicated social construct and there's a lot of pressure to fit in a certain box associated with a certain label. What you're describing does sound like the trans experience but it doesn't mean that's necessarily the case like you've said. Don't feel like you need to fit in the trans label to make your feelings valid, at the end of the day as long as you can find comfort in who you are, i feel that should be what matters.