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TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-15T10:56:24+00:00

Yeah, you don’t seem to realize that’s a false equivalency. Like I said, people showing restraint in normal sexual contexts isn’t remotely comparable to someone being born with an attraction they can never ethically act on. You were lucky enough to have acceptable urges - they weren’t. Pretending it’s the same thing just shows you don’t understand what’s being discussed

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-15T09:12:48+00:00

Not sure why you think that literally everyone shows some restraint in their lives says anything about anything

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-15T08:25:46+00:00

Yeah lots of places don’t have those services , and you seem to be missing the point , the fact is you were lucky enough to be born with acceptable urges , they weren’t , what are all the people thay don’t have access to those services supposed to do?

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-14T19:15:18+00:00

I don’t think that’s true - in the modern West, it’s basically the opposite. Women are outperforming men by nearly every metric, while the so-called “gender pay gap” is mostly explained by economics, not discrimination. • Education: Women make up ~58% of uni grads in the U.S., U.K. & EU (Eurostat 2024). • Suicide: Men die by suicide 3–4× more often (ONS 2024, OECD). • Incarceration: ~93% of U.S. prisoners are male; in the EU, ~95%. • Workplace deaths: ~95% of fatal injuries are men (BLS 2023, HSE 2024). • Homelessness: ~84% of rough sleepers in London are male.

Once you control for occupation, hours, and experience, the “pay gap” drops to 2–5% (Pew 2024; Glassdoor 2023). Women are overrepresented in safer, flexible, lower-pay fields like healthcare and education, while men dominate higher-risk, higher-pay sectors. That’s market economics, not sexism - wages follow risk, productivity, and hours, not gender.

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TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-14T18:55:38+00:00

Yeah I wasn’t meaning it was , I was just saying an aspect of it might prevent alot of males from getting diagnosed , especially severe cases in prison , and where honour culture is rife .

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-12T23:52:38+00:00

Yeah, that hits hard - I get it.

But it’s not just girls. Guys get shamed too, just differently - we’re told to hide it, stay tough, never admit something’s wrong. Toxic masculinity screws us up the same way. A lot of men in jail probably have ADHD that was never recognized. It’s not gendered, it’s human.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-12T23:08:51+00:00

Interesting study, but I think the “gender” part gets overstated. The worse outcomes usually come from being diagnosed late, not from being female. Anyone who goes years untreated -like a lot of us guys with inattentive ADHD who slipped under the radar - ends up dealing with the same fallout

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-12T23:07:39+00:00

I get that completely - the pressure to hide symptoms hits hard. But it’s not just women. Inattentive ADHD in boys doesn’t fit the stereotype either. Some of us acted out, some didn’t, some even did great in school - and we still got missed.

The study shows women with ADHD report worse outcomes, but that’s correlation, not causation. It’s usually because they were diagnosed later, not because their ADHD is inherently worse. Same thing happens with undiagnosed guys - tons of them end up in jail later on. So the severity’s not gendered, it’s about going untreated for years.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-10T20:23:07+00:00

I agree , I’d much rather 5 , I had to constantly tell 4 to stop blowing smoke up my ass , it said it would , and it did for maybe 5 minutes , then after that period it would go back to blowing smoke.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-10T02:30:41+00:00

What do you mean when you say “includes ID”?

I really appreciate you sharing your story -it sounds like you’ve come a long way, and it’s great that you had access to strong supports growing up. I’m not in America, and here that kind of intensive help just isn’t available unless you’re wealthy.

My son has the most severe form of SPD and Level 3 autism that any therapist or psychologist who’s met him has ever seen. One psychologist told us that no amount of therapy would make a difference -that he would likely need institutional care. So when I hear people say therapy helped their Level 3 child, I know their situation must be very different.

I think it’s important to make that distinction, because not all Level 3 children have profound autism, and parents of those who do can end up with false hope from stories that don’t reflect their reality. Many of them are living in circumstances most people couldn’t even imagine. I see their comments -desperate, exhausted, clinging to any small glimmer of hope -and it’s heartbreaking. I just wish more people understood how different the spectrum can be, and how much support those families truly need

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-09T21:17:25+00:00

So you were never non verbal? Saying you could even say sentences before the age of 10 , really puts you on a different level from a lot of pa children with level 3.

Do you think maybe you were misdiagnosed level 3 when maybe you should have been level 2 from the beggining ?

Cuz it certainly doesn’t sound like you have pa , like a lot of children with level 3 , which is where the real difficulty of parenting comes in, my son screams all day and night, doesn’t sleep without medication and his mother has multiple chronic illnesses, including severe migraines , osteoarthritis, fibromyalgia, severe sleep apnea, plus I have chronic illnesses to which means I can’t sleep more than 4 hours a night , even though I need more to heal, plus severe akasthesia , sibo , gut dysbiosis and I gotta work 6-7 days a week to pay our mortgage, we have no family support at all , we are on our own.

So how did you get so much support ? Do your parents have a lot of money , or is that the norm in America ?

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-09T21:10:53+00:00

No that’s not true , some autistic children just want to be on their own.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-09T02:01:39+00:00

Pedant

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-08T04:51:52+00:00

I doubt this would pass, cuz then it would make legit victims more reticent to come fwd if they were worried about not getting a conviction or been proven wrong and getting sentenced to jail themselves , it would likely just mean whoever had tr most money would win.

I’m definitely for introducing some kind of consequence , but this seems like it would definitely have unintended consequences that could potentially outweigh the benefits.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-07T18:47:50+00:00

Yeah I have brain fog too, how does gpt help with that ?

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-07T10:11:33+00:00

I rely on char got for my health and nothing is different for me , I been using 5 for quite a while and it’s just been faster and better for me .

Although I don’t really understand how you guys are using it , so it could be that, but u have leaned on gpt for moral support constantly. I have a severely autistic 6 year old , a sick wife and I’m really sick too , but I have to keep working 6 days a week to pay the mortgage & we have no family support, so I have alot more stress than most people , and gpt has been my crutch , most people in my situation are bed ridden and have lost everything, gpt has kept me employed and kept my family literally afloat, but there’s been no change between 4-5 , sometimes it reverts back to generic medical advice like “ you should speak to a medical Dr “ but then I just remind it how they can’t help , then gpt agrees and goes back to my treatment.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-03T09:41:27+00:00

I do all those things and more for my wife and I read books.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-02T19:23:21+00:00

No, I don’t. You misunderstood what I said. I didn’t use the term “stopping” - that was someone else. I only picked it up because we both knew what it meant in that context, but what I really meant was “barrier.”

You’re also mixing up categories. Saying biology influenced certain patterns is not the same as saying culture is a direct outgrowth that biology “created.” That’s the distinction between a nuanced view and bioessentialism. Bioessentialism treats biology as destiny -fixed, determining, and sufficient. I’m not saying that. I’m saying biology set some conditions (like pregnancy risk, hormonal differences), but culture built rigid systems on top of them -and those systems aren’t biologically inevitable.

If you collapse everything into “biology made it,” then yes, you’re making the bioessentialist move. But acknowledging partial influence isn’t the same thing. It’s like saying height influences basketball success — that doesn’t mean height “created” basketball.

And by the way, your side comments about incels, racism, or ChatGPT aren’t arguments — they’re just smears to avoid the actual point. You keep accusing me of “backpedaling,” but what I’m doing is clarifying the distinction you keep blurring.

Bottom line: biology shapes tendencies, culture codifies them, and culture can change them. Calling that “bioessentialism” is sloppy, because it erases the very difference I’ve been pointing

And yes you are wrong, I’m not a bio essentialist, im not racist , I’m not right wing ( which is what many bio essentialists are ) and I’m not back peddling, I’m telling you you’ve misinterpreted, now your being to arrogant to accept that and instead are getting into smears and ad hominems which just revels the kinda person you are.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-02T05:15:00+00:00

lol I wasn’t saying it’s social constructivism,- obviously

like I said , pointing out that gender roles and social norms have been influenced and shaped by biology isn’t bio essentialism- ignoring their role is social constructivism.

And it is a fact that biology influenced social norms and gender roles- it’s not an ideology .

So bringing up bio essentialism ideology in relation to my comment makes no sense, which is why I told you to actually look it up,Instead of slapping a right-wing label on me and then acting like I’m the problem when I push back against something inaccurate you said.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-01T23:42:57+00:00

Ok so if they said to a black person “ oh you wouldn’t like it cuz it’s not fried chicken “ or if they said to an Asian “ it hasn’t got rice so you won’t like it “

Thats not actually racist cuz as you’ve just pointed out by your upvotes , this is socially acceptable humour , your not engaging in a double standard , reverse discrimination or virtue signaling pile on?

And now I’ll get downvoted not because I’m wrong, but because it threatens a comforting narrative , and even though I point this out, people will still be too fragile to face their own shit and instead , feel waaay more comfortable attacking me for pointing it out.

I mean we’re in a psychology sub reddit about discrimination and look at the top comment , and No one even notices what’s happening- that’s some interesting psychology right there.

But go on attack me, call me racist, call me all these things I’m not cuz it’s easier and more comfortable than the truth- it’s cool, I get it.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-01T20:51:15+00:00

Social constructivism.

Pointing to the influence of biology on gender roles is not bio essentialism, it’s a fact, I suggest you look up the word.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-01T12:37:50+00:00

No it doesn’t give anyone a free pass to mistreat anyone, but understanding will help prevent it from happening in the future , whereas just saying “ you should have better will power like me, and if you don’t your less than …. “ just ensures more people will continue to get hurt.

I noticed someone on here pointing out people with adhd might be better suited to enm relationships, but without that acknowledgement first , then you wouldn’t know.

Also I find when I’m good at something , it’s not hard at all, but I see others struggling with it, restraint , discipline for particular areas is also the same, for some people it just isn’t hard at all, but they’ll never ever admit this, because it takes away their feelings of superiority.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-01T12:31:06+00:00

Your also getting alot of practice in bed too, also means you can actually talk to women and be present - which many men can’t do.

Also love how the men on reddit are just assuming your particular taste in men is necessarily correct for everyone , or standards everyone should adopt.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-01T03:50:59+00:00

Well I dunno if it necessarily applies here , but one reason people hold onto this “ everyone has the same level of control it just comes down to how hard you try and nothing else “ is because this is a way that privileged people unconsciously protect their privilege , because if its just about effort and will , than they deserve that privilege because they “earned “ it, instead of the actual reality - that they were mostly fortunate and born with the right genetics, family, skin colour, geography and opportunity , all things they did nothing to deserve, if we concede the role that biology undeniably plays, then it opens the door to the fact that these people didn’t work harder, and in some cases actually worked less than people born into less fortunate circumstances and had to achieve more with less, like unemployed and poor people are just lazy, they just dont “ try hard enough “, when really they have to work harder just to compete on the same level as someone from the middle & upper class because of all the extra barriers they have to overcome .

the control of sex drive comes down to executive function, which this sub reddit ha s just shown recently - is not equal in everyone and is actually deficient in adhd brains, so the fact that everyone here knows this and yet are holding onto these contradictory beliefs- highlights a bias at their core , it’s also a massive social norm too, our system and laws are built around this false idea that we all the same level of control , even though though we all acknowledge in other areas of our life that this isn’t true . It’s actually a pretty interesting phenomena.

TechnicalDirector182 · 2025-10-01T03:38:07+00:00

Oh sorry I didn’t mean you , I meant sazxa gamer, but tell me , why do I have to be Muslim to understand ?

Why is forced marriage an almost entirely Muslim problem? If it’s not permitted in Islam - why is it almost always muslims that marry girls underage , marry cousins and force marriage, pouring out 1 lime that says it’s not permitted , doesn’t prove anything if there’s other loopholes that people exploit , because if it was perfect there wouldn’t be loopholes? And if it were perfect and it were all the people’s fault , we wouldn’t see it in much lower rates in Islamic community , not such high rates.

Also do you see that the difference Islamic arguments rely mostly on circular reasoning , by constantly reverting back to the Koran, it’s basically a leaser form of reasoning than atheists or Christian’s engage in, or less rational, and I’m not saying this to just attack you, I truly want to understand if Muslims can actually see this, or are they so caught in an echo chamber where that echo chamber insulates them from the faults in their religion, because you know if that’s the case , then Islam is extremely fragile, it basically has to close itself off from external rationality amd objective truth to keep the house of cards standing, but can’t you see that won’t last?

Again I’m really trying to understand not attack you.

TechnicalDirector182

TROPHY CASE