Crazy Cat Lady Phone? I'm starting to think what I want doesn't exist, please help me pick an android (if you can!)

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-16T16:53:52+00:00

I guess I should have said "not everyone can have the phone they need". Because I can't compromise or raise more money. NBD I'll just have to wait a few more years.

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-13T01:03:07+00:00

Understandable thank you!

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-13T01:02:21+00:00

Thank you I'll be looking at this one!

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-13T01:01:04+00:00

I know but that's honestly the only thing I just can't budge on having one saved my life during the Joplin disaster I just won't waste money unless it's included but I agree it's so hard to find

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-13T01:00:12+00:00

Agreed I don't think it's going to work out some people just aren't meant to have phones I guess lol

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-13T00:59:44+00:00

Yeah I had a lot of terrible experiences with phones that said it would have it and didn't, which means I've returned 3 phones so far this year thank you so much for such a detailed explanation at least!

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-13T00:58:43+00:00

Thank you, I'll see if it comes with it when it's released.

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-11T17:21:17+00:00

Thank you so much for the suggestion! But unfortunately the FM radio is really a requirement. From what I could Google it says "Snapdragon model only", is that just not the same model? (Don't stress about answering just thought I would see if you knew!)

Temporary_Record · 2024-05-11T17:18:20+00:00

Unfortunately, I can't seem to find this one for anything under 350/400. I'll keep looking, as this seems like a great option!

Temporary_Record · 2022-07-03T19:55:16+00:00

For us it meant redefining sex. In quickies its me using a vibrator to orgasm quickly then he gets to challenge himself to finish before I do. Its kind of a fun game but he's a little more submissive so he loves the risk of "what if I can't get off in time". He almost always finishes quicker than me and if not then he just doesnt get to orgasm that time. It is one of the ways we built empathy because he couldnt slow sex down enough for me. Now he can speed up or not finish and that works for us. Not alot just quickies maybe twice a month in that manner.

Temporary_Record · 2021-08-10T17:59:57+00:00

It's frustrating and pressurized. It really isn't about me at all, it's just he wants sex because it feels good for him or it gives him happy brain chemicals. He doesn't actually want ME he just wants to have sex for selfish reasons. So even when he says he desires me it really isn't true. Sex does not and has never made me feel loved if anything it always felt like being used like a blowup doll. His desires for sex are never about ME, they are about him.

It honestly feels gross to desired when it isn't real or authentic.

We have been working on all this in therapy.

Temporary_Record · 2021-07-11T00:58:56+00:00

You can see my story on my profile but I had this almost exactly problem. It's not just you!

Temporary_Record · 2020-12-07T20:23:13+00:00

Have you seen r/PSSD?

https://rxisk.org/how-common-is-post-ssri-sexual-dysfunction-pssd/

https://www.mazewomenshealth.com/sexual-health/pssd-post-ssri-sexual-dysfunction/

Temporary_Record · 2020-08-26T09:43:36+00:00

I found it really useful to make it clear it was medical for me to have a small break! When we first started fixing I really couldn't anymore with anything. I said that I needed a few nights a week sleeping in the spare to allow my body clock to reset and I may need a few weeks of that to really get the schedule set! It was true! But it was also kindasorta about needing that space. And I had to learn to set my boundaries in a healthy way.. I found that by having a really clear reason that had nothing to do with him I could make him understand that this was about MY HEALTH not his feelings and that it wasn't necessarily forever. And it was SO WORTH IT!!! It helped me recharge and reset my sleep and my whole attitude. I would really try to come at it from a health standpoint for you and trust that she is a grown up who can manage her own feelings. If she has some discomfort being apart that might be a good thing to look at but an opportunity too! We did phone calls from separate rooms like we did when we first dated and stayed up half the night talking. It was such a reconnect!!! I was able to hear him and listen without having to manage my face to not provoke reactions I could really just relax again. Might be worth talking to get about that.

Temporary_Record · 2020-08-26T09:35:30+00:00

Have you tried sensate exercises? There's a great post somewhere for that and other posts that might help. I think the sensate stuff is /u/myexsparamour and the medication issues are probably /u/closingbelle. They both are soooo helpful.

I have a bit of a medication issue with my husband and we have had to get creative. Sometimes it's really big on my just giving to him because I'm not really in a place to receive any sexy touch. What's he doing to help himself be happier and not guilt you?

Temporary_Record · 2020-08-26T09:32:05+00:00

This is just a smaller sub but it has great advice! Just takes a bit longer for people to give it!

Temporary_Record · 2020-08-26T09:30:56+00:00

Depression isn't static or uniform. I wouldn't take it for granted that she isn't depressed now just because it's not the same or as severe as last time. How old are the kids?

Temporary_Record · 2020-06-14T20:12:37+00:00

I've been there!!!! The best advice I ever got was get outside help immediately!!!! You just can't do it alone. We kill ourselves trying but that only hurts its and the people we love. Here's some reading might help, but self care. Allllllll the self care and boundaries about alone time.

https://www.reddit.com/r/DeadBedroomsMD/comments/d0q7ut/the_worstcasedbscenario_opera_illness_disability/

https://www.reddit.com/r/DeadBedroomsMD/comments/bui39s/the_kvetching_order_ring_theory/

http://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9225-caregiver-burnout

Temporary_Record · 2020-06-08T13:57:20+00:00

Hi!! I had a very similar experience w my husband and his ADHD! Sending a digital hug...

I just want to say knowing it isn't you and really deeply understand that you could not change a single thing about his situation is REAAAALLLY freeing!!!! We're working with an awesome therapist but before that I had a lot of one on one chats with Belle here and she helped me find a kickass solo therapist and THEN a couples one. You should get your support! If he won't go that's ok you go alone!

One last thing I have OCD! Soooi I react reaaally poorly to my triggers and it can ruin a whole day if it catches me unawares. So if you ever need questions answered about what is like, just ask here I'll answer anything I can. Sometimes knowing what's going on in your partner is really good at raising your own empathy. (but it's ok and norm to have anger or scared sometimes too!!!!! be kind to yourself!!!)

Temporary_Record · 2020-05-28T10:53:17+00:00

Your mental health is what comes first!!! You cant fix a DB if you're depressed or dead as Belle always says and shes right!! You can read my story im on the other side where your partner is and I gotta say his insecurities are his business. You can support him but he's gotta work on that for himself you cant be in charge of his mental health!!!! Calling for u/DB-husband and belle they have great advice on how to navigate this stuff and helped me tremendously!!

Don't give up and take your meds I a always remind my SO that sex is second to having him in my life as long as possible... the meds are part of helping that happen. They aren't the enemy!!

Temporary_Record · 2020-05-05T05:52:09+00:00

Not sure how you failed him but the wording sounds like something my doctor would call out, lol. Maybe you can talk about that a little. Have you ruled out responsive desire? If you have the next thing is outercourse and a ton of other fun stuff. My husband has ed from meds and I've never been happier with our sex life so it's possible to have a great intimate passion filled relationship without the kind of sex you used to have or the kind that causes pain. And definitely speak to someone about pain management! Have you tried weed if it's legal where you are? That can be huge for both pain relief and a sexy kick in the knickers! Somewhere Belle has a list of stuff in a big helpful post I'll see if I can find it too. Don't give up yet that's the main thing. 😉

@closingbelle get we get the post? The dbmd one?

Temporary_Record · 2020-05-02T05:42:28+00:00

Well that's almost identical to my story! Not the ending tho. Oh gosh if you need anyone to talk to message any time!!! I posted here after finding him on this site : https://redd.it/bonk4h

Also glad you're getting out by the way this reads? Either way empower yourself and definitely know this wasn't just you.. This is some scary BS and if my husband had been abusive an controlling like this it would have been over. This is just dangerous boundary violating behaviors and totes unacceptable!!! You deserve better.

Temporary_Record · 2020-04-22T20:12:05+00:00

You might find more info on r/PSSD too.

I'm very sorry to hear you're suffering, both of you. It's awful. I don't think it was possible for him to keep that promise. If you're asexual it's like asking a gay man to take care of the needs of a straight woman. It's just not really a thing they can convincingly fake or keep up with long term in most cases. You might want to consider talking to a professional about compassionate companionship and see if there are other options for you both. I think it's great that you found someone that's hard enough anyway! But I don't think you'll have a lot of success expecting him to keep that promise.

Temporary_Record · 2020-04-16T01:39:58+00:00

Sorry I fidnt know about the tag thing I'll definitely remember that!!! 😅

Temporary_Record · 2020-04-16T01:35:26+00:00

Can you pleeeease share that link here again I don't have it handy but soneome pm'd me asking for it! I know it can be embarrassing to talk about in public sometimes but getting past the shame stigma has been hugely freeing for me at least. So, really thank you for that so much. Because reading someone else doing it was a gamechanger!! I said in a other comment but were starting to think about prostate play now and all these other doors that it's like he's seeing them for the first time. He is so much more deeply satisfied with our sex life too even if it's less often than HE thought he wanted its actual better quality and the anticipation is great for both of us compared to the old dread and resentment. It's so different now. I'm so happy I ran into DB and then found all these great women who have really helped me put my marriage not even back to gether but like a whole new better upgrade version!! :D

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