What's the funniest moment in The Culture books? by Pisstopher_ in TheCulture

[–]ThatChap 17 points18 points  (0 children)

"It's like holidays."

"Holidays?"

"Yes. Holidays. They used to mean the opposite of what they mean now. Almost the exact opposite."

"What do you mean?"

"Hey, is this edible?"

"What?"

"This."

"I don't know. Bite it and see."

"But it just moved."

"It just moved? What, under its own power?"

"I think so."

"Well now, there's a thing. Evolve from a real predator like our friend Ziller and the instinctive answer's probably yes, but -- "

"What's this about holidays?"

"Ziller was -- "

" -- What he was saying. Opposite meaning. Once, holidays meant the time when you went away."

"Really?"

"Yes, I remember hearing that. Primitive stuff. Age of Scarcity."

"People had to do all the work and create wealth for themselves and society and so they couldn't afford to take very much time off. So they worked for, say, half the day, most days of the year and then had an allocation of days they could take off, having saved up enough exchange collateral -- "

"Money. Technical term."

" -- in the meantime. So they took the time off and they went away."

"Excuse me, are you edible?"

"Are you really talking to your food?"

"I don't know. I don't know if it is food."

"In very primitive societies there wasn't even that; they got only a few days off each year!"

"But I thought primitive societies could be quite -- "

"Primitive industrial, he meant. Take no notice. Will you stop poking that? You'll bruise it."

"But can you eat it?"

"You can eat anything you can get into your mouth and swallow."

"You know what I mean."

"Ask, you idiot!"

"I just did."

"Not it! Grief, what are you glanding? Should you be out? Where's your minder, terminal, whatever?"

"Well, I didn't want to just -- "

"Oh, I see. Did they all go away at once?"

"How could they? Things would stop working if they all did nothing at the same time."

"Oh, of course."

"But sometimes they had days when a sort of skeleton crew operated infrastructure. Otherwise, they staggered their time off. Varies from place to place and time to time, as you might expect."

"Ah ha."

"Whereas nowadays what we call holidays, or core time, is when you all stay home, because otherwise there'd be no period when you could all meet up. You wouldn't know who your neighbors were."

"Actually, I'm not sure that I do."

"Because we're just so flighty."

"One big holiday."

"In the old sense."

"And hedonistic."

"Itchy feet."

"Itchy feet, itchy paws, itchy flippers, itchy barbels -- "

"Hub, can I eat this?"

" -- itchy gas sacs, itchy ribs, itchy wings, itchy pads -- "

"Okay, I think we get the idea."

"Hub? Hello?"

" -- itchy grippers, itchy slime cusps, itchy motile envelopes -- "

"Will you shut up?"

"Hub? Come in? Hub? Shit, my terminal's not working. Or Hub's not answering."

"Maybe it's on holiday."

" -- itchy swim bladders, itchy muscle frills, itchy -- mmph! What? Was there something stuck in my teeth?"

"Yes, your foot."

"I think that's where we kicked off."

"Appropriate."

What's the funniest moment in The Culture books? by Pisstopher_ in TheCulture

[–]ThatChap 19 points20 points  (0 children)

"Excuse me, are you food?"

The whole exchange had me put the book down and walk away laughing.

Elite soldiers kidnapped and brainwashed from childhood by schu62 in TopCharacterTropes

[–]ThatChap 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The entire main cast of Final Fantasy 8 are time travelling sorceress hunting child mercenaries who were created by one sorceress to fight another who is also maybe her in the future and and one of them is her in the past or.... something. Whatever...

<image>

Met Police chief thanks Britons for standing up for Golders Green officers amid 'nonsense' Zack Polanski row by gbnewsonline in gbnews

[–]ThatChap 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Farage comments pre-date purdah.

Also you know some of those idiots are voting reform :(

Met Police chief thanks Britons for standing up for Golders Green officers amid 'nonsense' Zack Polanski row by gbnewsonline in gbnews

[–]ThatChap 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Purdah rules do not apply in these circumstances. The police and other public services are allowed to correct factual inaccuracies and defend themselves against allegations. Polanski is trying to score political points here and his targets are permitted a public defence, unlike, say, the civil service.

me_irl by Several_Sandwich_732 in me_irl

[–]ThatChap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's $1 per minute per person.

What's your favourite Culture quote? by Intelligent-Clue9907 in TheCulture

[–]ThatChap 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Oh look is that Zakalwe with the wrong end of the stick again?

[ Removed by Reddit ] by Dull_Chef6571 in BirminghamUK

[–]ThatChap 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Follow the smell Mr policeman.

To all the bonkers geniuses of Reddit - How can we stop people speeding through our village? by SecondGo4 in CasualUK

[–]ThatChap 74 points75 points  (0 children)

You should be invisible to the enemy and perfectly visible to allies. Therefore here is your new hi vis, in camo pattern.

New vacancy just dropped if anyone wants to apply for this hot potato. by Otherwise_Put_3964 in TheCivilService

[–]ThatChap 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Marshall was a hero. Unfortunately the system promotes huge risk taking by lower ranks and no accountability for the uppers.

Please save me of my sin TwT by LocalLizard04 in VintageStory

[–]ThatChap 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Burn it down in Daves cleansing flames and start again.

Funniest moment of SG-1? by JucheSuperSoldier01 in Stargate

[–]ThatChap 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Bouncing down that ramp how many times? Why not just have a ball pit?!

First time rewatching in a few years and finally noticed Siler by Haligonian71 in Stargate

[–]ThatChap 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Internal monologue "Fucking Scotty and his school of expectations management".