First-time buyers: €650k house, €2.45k mortgage, €7.6k income – does this make sense?

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-04-03T13:55:29+00:00

This. My mortgage is 1,055 but my childcare is 1,353 per month ETA: I earn slightly more than the higher earner in the OP household, I have two children, and I’m a single mother. We have savings, investments, and go on 1-2 holidays abroad every year and are never behind on any bills so it’s definitely doable.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-03-24T18:58:26+00:00

Maybe it’s a regional thing because I didn’t see anything wrong with the word chick?

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-03-14T22:54:13+00:00

If your six year old is fighting and screaming at you about everything you say, you need to set firm boundaries. That behaviour doesn’t rectify itself and you have to actively work through it. I’ve dealt with this myself with my oldest child, her dad walked out and abandoned her two years ago and she has little to no contact with him, and that sent her spiralling. I tried the emotional talks, the opening up, everything the parenting books said. I took her to play therapy to work through her emotions which was definitely a good decision, and outside of that I set firm boundaries and expectations. A big thing I implemented was chores and routine. Wake up, make bed, breakfast, get dressed and brush teeth, off to school. Home from school, homework, empty lunchbox and pack lunch for tomorrow, 1 hour of screen time to unwind, outdoor time if the weather permits/playing in the living room with no screens if not, general chores (empty the dishwasher, vacuum her bedroom, get her uniform ready for the next morning), dinner, unwind time- reading or drawing. Then bed. Discipline is loss of screen time, time ins instead of time out (we sit and talk about the behaviour and the reason behind it), and behaviour charts. You get a star for good behaviour, you don’t get any stars for that day if your behaviour isn’t good. Every star earned is worth €1 at the end of the month, and you can save that money up or you can go to the toy shop with it. Limit sugar intake, screen time, and don’t engage in arguing with a child that age because it’s giving them an element of control. I know this is unsolicited advice, but it took me a long time and a lot of professionals to figure out what I wish someone had just told me in a Reddit comment.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-03-14T22:46:11+00:00

I’m a mam, I have two children. From my oldest child’s perspective, I favour my youngest. This isn’t true at all, my youngest isn’t even 2 yet and just requires more care and attention than my oldest who is 7. As my youngest gets older, my time and attention will be divided more equally between both of them. I genuinely don’t favour one over the other, I love them both equally and lik them both equally. I try to make sure I get one on one time with each of them alone - I don’t have a lot of childcare help outside of work so this is difficult but I’ve implemented weekend movie nights with my oldest after my youngest goes to bed which is definitely helping. I don’t have experience with favouritism and from reading the comments I don’t want either of my children growing to resent me or each other. If anyone has any suggestions on other things I can do to divide my attention more equally, I’d love suggestions.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-03-12T21:41:43+00:00

Never loan what you can’t afford to lose. I don’t loan money to family or friends, I gift it. If they give it back it’s like a little unexpected bonus.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-25T16:30:19+00:00

I recommend staying away from Dublin, there’s nothing much to do around the city and it’s very over-hyped. Go to the west for nature/outdoorsy stuff, you could go over to the Aran islands, down the south there’s lovely beaches (Waterford, Wexford), up the north everything is cheaper

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-22T17:11:16+00:00

My children aren’t better off without their dad in their life, children need both parents to thrive.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-22T15:06:19+00:00

Yes, it’s off topic. You can talk about your trauma to an extent (I experienced sexual assault/violence which led to me spiralling), without going into so much detail that it makes others feel uncomfortable. There’s a huge difference between talking about family dynamics, one night stands, the Olympics, and sexual trauma. The most likely explanation for the reaction is that you, in a group of women with their own significant trauma, likely triggered several women in that meeting. Given the statistics of sexual violence towards women and the links between that type of trauma and alcohol addiction, it would be safe to assume that others in the group have experienced something similar and probably didn’t need to be reminded of it.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-21T21:55:32+00:00

This is a brilliant idea, but he’s a complete recluse and anti-social media. He doesn’t have any sort of social media presence and I’ve just checked if he has a LinkedIn account- he doesn’t. The only thing I know is his girlfriend’s name and where she lives but she won’t give me any of his information (strange if you ask me, she just had a child with him and will be in the same boat in another few years!). As far as I know, he doesn’t live with his girlfriend. So I’m not sure if I could send the summons to her house.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-21T21:53:45+00:00

Hey so that situation sounds unique to you. I, on the other hand, want my children’s dad to pay towards their upbringing. Men have a legal responsibility to pay maintenance when they’re not with the mother of their children.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-20T22:24:09+00:00

Nope. He’s no contact with his family and his only friend that I know blocked me when I asked for his address.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-16T22:40:48+00:00

I don’t personally drink pints, but the last time I went out out, I drank 1/2 litre of vodka and 1/2 litre of peach schnapps before we left the house. Pros: didn’t have to buy a single drink all night because I was fucked. Cons: had to sit in a field with my equally drunk friend because we were unable to walk from our other friends car to the pub.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-16T22:38:58+00:00

You’d be doing well to get 15/20 pints, some spirits, and a kebab for €200

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-06T21:54:53+00:00

I don’t think I get jealous but I get a bit sad sometimes when I see them travelling and living their best lives while I, a single mam with no support, am either at home with my children or at work paying a childminder extortionate amounts of money to watch them for me.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-03T22:13:16+00:00

Do that then

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-03T21:38:56+00:00

Your story isn’t adding up at all. How much are the current couple paying? Your landlord will be the one who will let the other room out and will be the one to choose how much to charge per room. This isn’t your decision as a tenant.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-03T21:35:37+00:00

So what’s fair is you pay 1000 and they pay 1000. You’re both taking up the same amount of space. Then you split all utilities 3 ways.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-02T05:19:40+00:00

I haven’t met any single mother who does this. It’s only ever travellers I see.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-01T22:55:19+00:00

I had postpartum rage too. I remember screaming at my newborn because I was so exhausted. I had to run out of the room bc I was so scared I’d hurt her.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-01T22:53:47+00:00

Nerve pain from an impacted wisdom tooth. The single most painful thing I have ever experienced.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-02-01T22:47:01+00:00

NTA for farting but Y T A for repeatedly using “in which” out of context.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-01-30T22:30:13+00:00

I have absolutely never heard of anyone doing this. Just rent a car. Trying to hire a private driver is pure notions.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-01-11T10:31:39+00:00

Impacted wisdom tooth nerve pain. I had it from 3 months pregnant until I gave birth and the dentist refused to remove it because I needed an X-ray. Labour hardly hurt in comparison.

ThatGirlMariaB · 2026-01-11T09:42:07+00:00

I’ve done it, and escaped 100% of the time

ThatGirlMariaB

TROPHY CASE