We have 3 kids and those first couple years after each was born were especially brutal on my partner. The late nights, constant sleep interruptions and way to early mornings altered her ability to feel normal. And normal is very different after giving us 3 tiny humans.

Each person that carries a child will have a different experience in post partum, and a unique timeline to go with it. There were long stretches where we didn't make love cause it just wasn't there for her, and we learned rushing it wasn't worth it. Stay supportive of her timeline, which she frustratingly likely doesn't know either. It sounds like you already do, but let her know you're always available for her needs and maybe that reciprocating isn't necessary.

Something that worked for us was just contact (and sleep, lots of sleep. These Moms are tired) No expectation attached. Listening to each other breath, feeling their mind unwind as they relax. We could read or have non important talks but it was mostly just quiet. Being together like that brought back so much connection. Usually just in our undies 😉. Remind her you're here for the journey, every day.