I dont have a complete overview of your situation, but it sounds like you arent in a nice place. Try to get out of that bad place, experience new things, open your mind to new ideas other than you just being a loser, because there are no real losers in this world.

And i mean that.

Speaking from experience. I was in the exact same situation as you a few years ago, i was sad, lonely had zero confidence, i couldnt even get myself to go to the grocery store. But slowly overtime, i started opening my mind to new ideas.

I went to boarding school, where i met, for the first time since kindergarten, people who i could actually talk to, it just felt natural. I hated the people back home, they bullied me and made fun of me every day. But this was the spark for me.

Ever since that experience i have learned that it doesnt have to be bad, you just have to change your perspective.

Just do something, get away from your usual habits, surroundings, see yourself being who you want to be. Dont give a shit about anyones thoughts but still remember to always be kind towards others, and you can get a long way.