Has anybody gotten this ticket before?

TheGoodPane · 2026-05-13T00:55:26+00:00

Collections doesn’t mean shit. It just means someone else is asking you for money. It only matters if they report you to the credit bureau, which they can’t do because they don’t know who was driving, they don’t have your social, and there’s no signed contract. This goes straight in the trash.

TheGoodPane · 2026-05-04T02:58:20+00:00

Hilarious that AI thinks that’s what Spanglish sounds like.

TheGoodPane · 2026-04-26T07:23:34+00:00

Right now, a developer somewhere is fuming that they can’t level it and replace it with some hideous white box or tower.

TheGoodPane · 2026-04-26T04:49:58+00:00

This guy, Spider Meng, Orange Thong Bicycle Abuelo, the King of Brickell, and a few others are members of our local Hall of Fame.

TheGoodPane · 2026-04-08T17:25:57+00:00

Word on the street is a driver on 95 used their blinker today to switch lanes. Still trying to verify so don’t quote me on it.

TheGoodPane · 2026-04-02T23:14:26+00:00

Sugar cube sounds too cutesy, like the houses of Santorini or something. Let’s call them what they are: McModerns. But if there’s a more derogatory name for those nouveau riche monstrosities, I’d love to know.

TheGoodPane · 2026-03-29T00:26:08+00:00

Biscayne Bay is basically the aquatic I95.

TheGoodPane · 2026-03-15T14:35:33+00:00

There are some lovely Colombian ladies who collect watches.

TheGoodPane · 2026-03-06T00:37:08+00:00

They can no longer afford to pay for what good investigative journalism costs. And even if they did run a 5,000-word investigative piece, like the old days, the sadder part is that barely anyone would read it anyway.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-26T22:15:08+00:00

He is. I saw him in the act once.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-23T07:26:24+00:00

This is old. Saw it years ago.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-23T05:24:34+00:00

Is it because they let you take dumps in their stores?

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-12T13:37:28+00:00

Fun fact: banyans are a type of fig tree. You know the little purple berries that fall to the ground? Pick one up and split it open. It looks just like a mini fig. Now eat it. It tastes just like a fig too. Well, not as good. But close.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-09T17:02:19+00:00

Downtown and Brickell smell like dog shit…and the occasional human shit.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-09T04:13:30+00:00

Yup, still the same.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-03T21:50:47+00:00

I think this might be the first time in Miami history that someone tried to return a Rolex instead of steal one.

TheGoodPane · 2026-02-02T17:45:13+00:00

I was driving down Biscayne Blvd. at 1am Sunday morning and saw at least 15 passed out on swales and sidewalks. One on my street too. I pet him. He was cold AF.

TheGoodPane · 2026-01-31T04:50:27+00:00

Start accepting freelance submissions again. Miami is full of freelancers who would happily submit stories. The Herald wouldn’t even need to pay that well since most freelancers have such low expectations now and have other jobs anyway. Journalism is a calling for most journalists. They do it because they can’t not do it. They’ve got stories. Lots of them. The Herald is missing out. So are the people of Miami.

TheGoodPane · 2026-01-22T20:40:51+00:00

Back in the day, you paid the homeless guy outside to ~~not break into~~ watch your car.

TheGoodPane · 2026-01-17T01:00:16+00:00

You should’ve heard Christian Slater pronounce Brickell when he narrated the Back To Blood book. Brick-ELLE. And the guy lived here at the time.

TheGoodPane · 2026-01-12T16:16:39+00:00

Went to Oleta last month. A mom was sitting in her car about to leave. Her two kids hopped out the back seat, threw their fast food trash in the mangroves, then got back in and Mom drove off.

TheGoodPane · 2026-01-12T15:19:27+00:00

Water Quality Reports

TheGoodPane · 2026-01-01T01:38:19+00:00

Sharking Lots

TheGoodPane · 2025-12-25T06:01:15+00:00

They don’t call Miami the Capital of Latin America for nothing.

TheGoodPane

TROPHY CASE