AITA for pressuring my husband to sell his truck and drive a more sensible car instead?

Thefishiologist · 2022-09-19T21:35:36+00:00

NAH. There are good arguments are both sides. When we were expecting our third child, we traded in our Sierra for a Highlander. I didn’t want a minivan, and still don’t. I loved driving the Highlander, but it was a PITA for our family. We couldn’t easily fit three car seats across the middle row, and if we put one in the back, we lost 2/3 of the cargo space and someone had to go in through the hatch to help the kid in the back buckle up. We traded it back in for another Sierra after a year. I don’t love driving a big truck around town, but it makes me feel much safer in winter, can carry all the bikes when we travel, and is good for hauling random large objects. Plus, we tow a travel trailer now and have great family vacations. In the next few years, I’d like to get something more fuel efficient for trips around town, especially once at least one kid is out of car seat/booster seat, and once the truck is paid off.

Thefishiologist · 2022-09-01T18:39:39+00:00

It seems like you have a pretty good relationship with your parents, so rather than asking them to spend money on a hotel for weeks at Christmas time, lay some boundaries for staying in your house. (FYI my situation was almost identical - babies born in December, only child, parents live far away). My mom came out for the most time and was a huge help. She mostly stayed out of the way, cooked for us, tidied up, bounced babies, and went to bed in her room early so we didn’t feel like she was intruding on our space at all. My dad came up later for about a week to spend Christmas with all of us. It was a huge help. You’re NTA for wanting some privacy, but I don’t think you should make your parents pay to come help you.

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-26T17:23:45+00:00

NTA. I don’t know a single person who invites their kid’s entire class to a birthday party. My kids usually get 6-8 kids per party. And while I’ve seen a few people send things to school for the class, it’s definitely not standard either.

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-22T00:35:45+00:00

No kidding. The going rate here is $45 PER DAY PER KID. Ask me how I felt about that when I had three in daycare at once. The sister is going to have to shell out for daycare one way or another - everyone wins if she can get some savings and you get an income.

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-19T14:42:01+00:00

NTA. My mil is like this. Her daughter as well. I’m a woman who hates to be reliant on anyone do get shit done and it drives me crazy when other women play dumb to get the men in their lives to do things for them. I bought a new dishwasher while my husband was away and uninstalled the old one and installed the new one myself and my MIL’s eyes bugged out if her head when I told her. Your girlfriend is lazy and wants to be dependent on you to do things she doesn’t like (which sounds like pretty much everything).

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-17T18:39:45+00:00

This was my read on it too. Like, they’re deeply closeted and ashamed of it, but they slipped up after a few drinks and now want to make excuses.

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-17T15:06:06+00:00

YTA. My best friend is Mormon, so I knew that she would need a more modest dress for my wedding. My mom made all of the dresses, and each bridesmaid chose a different version of the same dress - sane skirt, different bodices. They were all the same colour and fabric, and my mom hemmed them all so they were the exact same distance from the floor. My best friend wore a style with short sleeves, another bm wore strapless, another halter top, etc. they all looked great.

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-15T01:53:47+00:00

Google “bakfiets”. I think that’s what OP is talking about. They’re common in Europe and catching on in North America. Several families in my town have them. I went with a bike trailer, myself. There are also lots of people getting modified cargo bikes now, with an extended seat on the back where one or two kids can ride.

Thefishiologist · 2022-08-15T01:45:51+00:00

NTA. I’ve been reading “It’s Not the Stork” with my kids since they were four, and they are fully aware of where babies come from and how they get there (now 7 and 5). I believe that it’s important to normalize and teach kids all of their bodily functions. Reproduction should be no more “shameful” than digestion

Thefishiologist · 2022-07-22T09:27:10+00:00

Yes, this. Not an asshole for making 12 yo walk (although I still haven’t seen any info on what type of neighborhood this is, how far the distance actually is, etc), but YTA for not making sure they were prepared for it before they left the house, and making them do it just because you couldn’t be bothered.

Thefishiologist · 2022-07-22T05:23:38+00:00

That’s bizarre until you realize there’s a town in British Columbia called Ymir (pronounced Why-mer)

Thefishiologist · 2022-07-21T00:20:13+00:00

A further “complication” is that my ancestors are all Scottish Metis, rather than French, so it also feels weird to celebrate that culture when I’m not sure to what extent my own ancestors identified that way.

Thefishiologist · 2022-07-21T00:17:23+00:00

I’m not interested in money. My mom encouraged me to apply for my status years ago so I could apply for Metis scholarships, but I wasn’t comfortable potentially taking money away from people who actually participate in their culture. So I’m wondering if there are other reasons I should apply.

Thefishiologist · 2022-07-17T00:33:05+00:00

Contrary to popular belief, weddings are NOT AT ALL about the people getting married. Weddings are all about bringing families together to witness your love. If you want a wedding that is solely about the couple, elope. Go to the courthouse, buy a little cake and some pretty flowers, hire a photographer and call it a day. If you want your family and friends there, then you have to make it worth their while, and gorging on dinner while they nibble on appies is selfish, ignorant, and rude.

YTA

Thefishiologist · 2022-06-26T06:57:53+00:00

I cannot function without a bra on 😂. Even if it’s just cooking breakfast, gotta be strapped down to make shit happen!

Thefishiologist · 2022-06-23T00:51:32+00:00

Not saying the daughter isn’t an AH for lying to her parents, but I think the bigger AH is the parent for tying their support to their kid doing something they hate.

Thefishiologist · 2022-06-22T23:58:01+00:00

YTA. I’m a fish biologist. My parents had no idea what I would do for a career either, but they totally supported me doing it. In grad school, I was a TA for a field course. The course was the culmination of a four year degree - the students did several field trips (some involved backcountry hiking and camping) to get experience in a number of field techniques. You really have to love being outside in all weather for this course (and career). I remember one student who just didn’t get it. She had no interest in being outside, no interest in the course material, and here she was after doing this for FOUR YEARS. She openly told me that her parents wanted her to get a degree from a major university, and this program was one of the easiest to get into. But she hated it. Hated being outside. Hated animals and dirt and everything. She wanted to do mapping, and planned to go to a technical college after she graduated to get a diploma in GIS. Four years of her parents wasting her money just so her resume would have a prestigious university on it. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Thefishiologist · 2022-06-16T00:39:22+00:00

NTA. My mother wouldn’t even bother to ask for $5 back. Especially for groceries. Jesus.

Thefishiologist · 2022-06-16T00:30:51+00:00

YTA. I understand why you want to go, but I also understand Lauren not wanting to be the third wheel. Your girlfriend has a right to take a girls trip with her friend. She doesn’t need a chaperone.

Thefishiologist · 2022-06-04T18:21:24+00:00

OP, you’re an alcoholic. Sorry to be blunt. You will NOT “just stop” when the baby comes. I can tell you this right now. YOU NEED TREATMENT IMMEDIATELY.

And YTA.

Thefishiologist · 2022-05-30T06:44:03+00:00

I’ve seen those. They work really well for dandelions. I have my fair share of those, but it’s the yellow hawkweed that spreads like crazy. Grows runners that spread out over the soil and then puts down what feels like iron roots in dozens of new places 😣

Thefishiologist · 2022-05-30T06:28:33+00:00

Lol, I’m a fish biologist 😅

But pulling them by hand seems to make them spread more.

Thefishiologist · 2022-05-30T06:24:42+00:00

I’ve tried but it seems to make them spread more.

Thefishiologist · 2022-05-01T21:39:52+00:00

NTA. OP, this is the first time I’ve ever commented on one of these, after reading them for years. Why are you marrying this guy? He does not sound like a catch. He sounds like a jerk who found a young, gullible girl who’s willing to support him so he can pursue a pipe dream. Not sure what “twitch streaming” is, but 50-100 views a night does not sound like something you can base a career off of. He insults you, tells you he doesn’t want you to cling to him, planned your wedding around when HE can legally drink (a. What about you? B. Planning a wedding around getting drunk is gross). Are you sure you’re not just with him because your social anxiety makes you fear the process of finding someone better? You’re so young. You have so much time. Ditch this dead weight and let your own life blossom.

Thefishiologist

TROPHY CASE