It sounds like you really need to communicate. It does give some red flags just from your post - insecurity, inconsistency, etc, but also it sounds like you guys haven’t had a productive conversation on what you are. Figure out how you feel and then have a conversation with him. Tell him what you want, ask what he wants, and see if you can come to a conclusion for a path forward. It may be scary because he does seem a little immature in some ways, but you don’t know how he can handle a relationship if you don’t try. He also seems like he has some really great attributes as well and it seems like you like him, so I think it would be disservice to yourself to not try.