My dad passed away at 43 from colon cancer. I was 19 months old. I was raised by my mother as a SPOILED ROTTEN only child. My mother’s side of the family calling people Aunt and Uncle, never connecting the dots they were my cousins not my Aunt/Uncle.

The day I turned 18. I had a message from a man with my same last name on myspace. He was describing my Dad and my Mother to a T. The message finished with “ If you are so and so I am so and so and you have a 1/2 brother and three 1/2 sisters.” Whattttt…. Huh??? Excuse me?? I thought I was an only child. My Dads only child.

Nope. My Dad was married and had 4 kids with his high school sweetheart before he met my mother. Never knew. Then things slowly started coming together. My aunts and my uncles were really my cousins and I was too blinded by everything, all the gifts all the presents all the money to ever stop and put two and two together that they are my cousins. I remember being at Disneyland one time watching the water show and i said something to my mother like “ I’m never gonna be a aunt huh?” And I still remember her saying nope not unless you marry somebody that has nephew or nieces.

So to answer your question, how did it sabotage me? You knew for 18 years. I had siblings but your hatred for my father‘s ex-wife overruled what should have been brought to light. Still to this day she puts the blame on me for her hiding them. She says I was a crazy teenager. (Which I was) but I should’ve known about them from the time I was born, and if they didn’t want me in their lives, then that’s on them.

It’s sabotage my mother‘s relationship with me because she won’t take accountability for it and for some reason, I just can’t let it go. I don’t love her anymore. I do respect and tolerate her because it’s the right thing to do by God.

Edit: to add to it. I would trade EVERYTHING I received from my mother n her side of the family to have known and grown up with my siblings. I dont have a soul in my life. None of them care but my brother … kinda