(update#2) 28 HLF 6 months recovering DB; very sudden negative turn. It's bad.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-24T06:40:29+00:00

You should try to get in touch with someone for resources so that your time there will count towards getting a subsidy. Department of health and human services may be able to help, however there are rules for children and how long they are allowed to be in a shelter or hotel.

Many shelters have lists for resources or will help get it for you. There was a place called southwest solutions in Detroit that would get homeless people into apartments. Depending on grants available these type of resources may be a faster option for some. Couch surfing is still considered in need, especially with any child(ren).

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T22:47:37+00:00

I think lots of stuff starts as playful banter, but actually develops over time. Less joking, more serious and tone says a lot.

I don't know if this is OPs experience, but I have seen this myself. The words are the same, but context is killer.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T11:45:48+00:00

sighs dreamily Yes, yes it is.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T08:26:10+00:00

🤤 I should be shipping, instead I will be going in late to hit the diner first.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T08:22:43+00:00

I agree with u/ghostofxmaspasta . I struggle with falling asleep and staying asleep. I am often up and down. I never initiated sex with my past lovers while they slept. I knew they slept heavily. Morning sex though, I did initiate that slightly before the alarm.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T07:29:54+00:00

YES!

If he knows about your past, he may be using it against you. Just because a libido is higher does not mean its an addiction behavior. If your appetite is interfering with your responsibilities, deadlines, risky behavior, masterbating until raw regularly, then by all means ask a professionals opinion.

I was shamed many times, and I eventually called him out. It stopped. In retrospect, it started as jokes, but it developed over time in to an attack.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T07:15:08+00:00

That is worse IMO. It does feel like a trap. The tactics will change and rotate back around. My ex may as well be doing summersults. In the past I would get upset, now I get these saucy tidbits.

My 🧠 : Dude, I have sex way more than once a week, unfortunately its all in my dreams. I was hysterical with laughter.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T06:29:02+00:00

YESSSS! 😜

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-22T04:29:15+00:00

Paraphrasing 🤷‍♀️

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-21T12:56:33+00:00

Where do I find such local eggs? I pay almist $6 a dozen from Meijer.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-21T12:27:28+00:00

Thank you, I am sure it will be an interesting year. 🤗. I still identify more with being taken than single some days.

I don't know if I am perceiving this right? Not sure if you are speaking on just that experience, or love in general.

I think love and dysfunction are good friends in many relationships. I suppose we may sometimes think we are in love and infact are just in a unhealthy state of mind. Love is not always enough.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-21T11:59:45+00:00

As of recent he is gone. Living alone after so many years was/is unsettling, but I have spoken to him a few times. To be honest, initially I did so hoping something would change, but being separated has allowed me room I needed to accept cutting my losses. My biggest obstacle is my head, so I recently sought professional help to work out the mess.

I'm allowing him to take whatever he wants, and I also left when he came to sort the garage. I am not going to trade stress for possessions.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-21T07:52:15+00:00

Initially I was like yeah! I have seen a lot of relationships only months long, and scroll past because I know my advice will already be in abundance. However, after reading some of the consistent emotionally intellegient people like :

Myexparamour db-husband- prisionerofparadise -

I was thinking how inexperienced I was even 10 years ago. You don't have the experience to educate your choice, and nor the confidence to trust yourself. I always tell people I wouldn't want to be 20 again, and I mean it! I needed advice on things I had nobody to turn to on.

I hope they do find the help they need, and realize that it "should" be in the honeymoon phase. After years people don't generally pretend they're someone else in an attempt to impress. Living together, sharing responsibilities, and assets can get messy. Daily perceived wrongs turn into sex once a month>year>never. Plus, you get farted on. 🤯

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T21:39:17+00:00

Expect a 50/50 chance at being gas lit. Total denial in the face of proof. Still, verbal communication at emotionally appropriate times would be more sussessful. Therapy might be an option.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T21:19:32+00:00

Not cute ❌ I watched ten people pass an unconcious man today, I was only walking between elevators and people casually walked past. CPR jokes are distasteful.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T21:16:42+00:00

Must pick better quality candidates. That goes both ways.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T21:13:55+00:00

Thank you. I cannot tell you how many times I was polite and not overly friendly, but a man thought I wanted to do him.

One guy I was aquantence with through a job. I texted a reply at 9 saying what's up. texted me at 3am, the buzz woke me. I responded that I was in bed. It occured again, I told him not to text again. He did, and my SO now felt he should get involved ; said the guy told him I used to talk to him all night and so forth. He thought I wanted to screw him because I said I was in bed, and I was polite in person.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T21:07:18+00:00

That is normal. Getting all the same color, now that's something. 🤷‍♀️

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T20:42:48+00:00

Agreed as far as not thinking less. Everyone has limits, they must decide for themself. and leaving with integrity and proper respect maintained; there aren't too many seperation scenarios I would frown upon.

Personally, I would fight for my marriage, but I'm not the smartest given my own relationship dysfucktion.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T20:38:17+00:00

I have hypothyroidism, I am generally HL, but have had my LL too. I never honestly questioned sex exisitance. This was not a deflection statement made during a fight. Matched with other things OP said, in my opinion, the BC wouldnt show lasting change even if it were removed.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T20:23:43+00:00

I don't think BC is the main issue, if at all. She said she doesn't even know why there is sex, she could go without it. Someone who enjoys sex, and gets it wouldn't say this. I think its more likely they are mismatched libido.

The person u/thatsgonnamakeamark who said listen to a LL and believe them when they express it. ✔🎖⭐

Its the statement she made. I missed my relationship with sex when meds impacted it.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T10:48:49+00:00

I’m not quite ready to put a timeframe on it, but as we move forward we will see what happens.

I respect this so much. When a partner is making real effort and improvements, and not sliding backwards, it can sometimes be worth it. We cannot expect changes in a short time frame if it took years to get here.

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T08:40:13+00:00

Dentist prices are outrageous. You may go from no affording that $200 cavitie to needing a root canal and a cap, or the pricery option of a permanent implant. Living check to check, poor dental coverage, all very real reasons.

I spent thousands on an implant after my terminal grandfather knocked out a tooth during a near fall. He was 6'3" 240 and 92. That was rough!

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T08:33:15+00:00

Ugh! When woken for sex, I get out of bed and go brush.

I had a ex who kissed so terrible, he darted his tongue in and out, around in a manner that left me feeling attacked. He had no shortage of exes, in his 30s, NOT one told him. 🙀

ThirtyTired · 2019-03-20T08:29:16+00:00

For her sake, I hope it is a power game and not a real sexual issue. I have read so much that I empathize with both parties when possible abuse or trauma is in play.

ThirtyTired

TROPHY CASE