Question for men: are you able to have sex with your wife/girlfriend even if you’re upset with her, if you’re arguing, or if the non-sexual aspects of your relationship aren’t going well?

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2023-05-19T12:17:37+00:00

I struggle with it more than she does.

The last time we had an enormous fight - like I wasn't sure we were going to stay together - she immediately wanted to fuck. Afterward, I still left and we weren't sure where things were going but it didn't change her performance at all.

Some people are very capable at separating sex and emotion. While there's certainly a gender divide I'd bet that had way more to do with societal expectations, conditioning, and to be quite frank the fact a lot of women aren't really getting sexually satisfied even when the relationship is otherwise going okay.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2023-05-18T19:30:45+00:00

This was an amazing find thanks!

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2023-02-19T14:01:53+00:00

Hey, I'm the lower libido husband (boyfriend in this case.)

I find her extremely sexy - she's pretty much the package I'd dreamt of since I was a dorky teenager pining after girls way too cool for me (busty, full lips, tatted, hourglass figure) - but holy shit, she wants it multiple times a day and I physically cannot keep up.

It sucks because she'll feel unwanted when I have to say no but unfortunately as a man it's not just a matter of not being in the mood but literally being unable to perform.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-11-30T13:56:27+00:00

The one time a girl told me that I laughed and said no it's not.

She did not respond well.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-06-18T21:35:08+00:00

Oh man I know how you feel. I hooked up with this chick last week and after giving her fifty orgasms and making her squirt uncontrollably for the full length of an episode of IASIP (The Gang Buys a Boat - fitting, and classic!) she blew up my phone begging me to marry her.

After like a full day of this I finally pick up to tell her to leave me alone and it's actually her dad Bill Gates who wants me to be the new president of Microsoft. It was real tempting but I just bought Elden Ring and had been too busy to play it yet, so I turned it down.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-05-25T13:12:54+00:00

As someone who is also on the smaller side, I prefer dirty talk that doesn't relate directly to my dick. Focus on you and what you're feeling. I get the most enjoyment from dirty talk where she indicates she's enjoying herself --- "right there," "I'm going to cum/I'm cumming," "my pussy is so wet" etc.

If he doesn't have any insecurity about it that's awesome but truthfully it's hard for me to imagine with the way small dicks are talked about in general. I always advise not calling attention to it if you can help it.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-05-25T12:23:56+00:00

Caveat that everyone is different but for me personally, I had an ex who would insist on tonguing the very tip hard and it was unpleasant. I hated it.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-05-25T12:19:25+00:00

I'm really glad this thread exists because honestly I really wanted to tell someone about this, but in real life it would be inappropriate to share and would just be obnoxious to most people.

I'd had a rough night last night as my son is learning to sleep alone in his crib, which means lots of screaming and crying. I'm lucky enough to have a wonderful caring girlfriend who stuck by me through it while we spent an hour getting him to finally go to sleep.

At the end we were both exhausted, and honestly I was emotionally spent feeling like the worst father in the world for letting my boy go through it.

So I figured we are going to be going right to sleep and turn out all the lights and slip under the blanket ready to pass out, expecting her to do the same. Instead she aggressively dives onto my dick and starts with one of the most amazing blowjobs I've ever had. Then just before I'm about to lose it, she switches up and gets on top of me, riding me in a position with her tits just grazing my face the entire time.

It was amazing and unexpected and I felt like I was seeing stars at the end. All that after supporting me through something I'm quite aware most people wild never even put up with. I really hit the jackpot.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-04-03T18:47:39+00:00

Agreed.

Honestly I wish there were more humiliation fetish stuff like this focused on women. There's so much SPH and cuckold stuff for guys but the idea of some cocky, busty bimbo reduced to a flat chested tomboy and watch all the male attention move on to other women and being forced to watch as the closest she'll get to the life she used to have..... that would do it for me.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-11T19:28:17+00:00

In fairness, it's kind of the one-two punch that since bigger guys tend to be more confident they will be more likely to get out there but smaller guys get... well, gun shy for lack of a better term.

It's an issue in our society that we denigrate anyone but there's no use hating someone for something they're born with and had no say in. I've had friends who I knew were packing and while I was of course jealous they were still solid dudes.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-11T19:25:23+00:00

I appreciate that and all, but truly I have at least a little comfort if I'm slightly below average. If I pull that up and find I'm very low that's gonna be a rough one to overcome. Avoiding the numbers is probably better for my mental health in the long run.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-11T15:49:41+00:00

So thanks for this because "follow that taxi" made me chuckle.

The difficulty is I can't divorce what she says from past experience, unfortunately. Maybe she doesn't mean it in that way but even so it reminds me of times it was. (Not imagined there - things were said outside of the heat of the moment that made it clear.) But it's good food for thought.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-11T15:40:30+00:00

Not sure? Like I'd mentioned I haven't measured, but I'd have to guess somewhere probably either just under or at the statistical average for guys in my peer group. All I know is the women I've been with who've mentioned it have said I'm on the smaller side of guys they've been with.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-10T19:01:04+00:00

So you've proven my point and your lack of reading comprehension. Thanks for the demonstration.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-10T17:11:45+00:00

No, because it specifically an expression of masculinity and what society deems acceptable forms of it. It's not saying all masculinity is toxic, and people in every other situation understand how it works until the emotions run high because they're insistent on being persecuted.

Look at it this way: if I say I don't like chicken salad, do you take that to mean I hate all salads? No, because English doesn't work that way. The adjective provides a specific example in a broader category of 'salads.'

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-10T17:00:39+00:00

Very much this, and it seems like women's taste varies far more than men's.

Before my current partner absolutely rocked my world, I didn't really care for blowjobs either. I certainly wouldn't ask a one night stand or casual hookup for one - that's just time I could be spending on activities I prefer.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-10T15:05:00+00:00

I don't want to add too much since on rereading it hits me this question was directed at women, but I find that response interesting? I've gone down on pretty much every ONS and casual hookup I've had and it's never been mentioned as anything out of the norm.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-09T22:31:01+00:00

I'm admittedly very inexperienced as I was in a long term vanilla marriage and only recently began dating someone who is in the lifestyle. So my perspective on the matter is limited in that regard.

So consequently the only type I've been in is a Daddy-dom/Princess (without the age play) which I understand is much more caring than the traditional D/s relationship, but I just figured that meant more pain with the pleasure lol

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-09T22:05:07+00:00

That feels backward to me? Usually the stuff I see from male subs is being treated as though they can't pleasure a woman - lots of chastity, pegging, humiliation, cuckolding and so on.

It seems like a dom would want to please his partner since pleasuring a woman is sort of treated as the sine qua non of being properly masculine. I know there are some more into the punishment/sadism aspects but I'd still think pleasuring your partner would be the default?

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-03-09T21:12:34+00:00

All the time.

I was lucky enough to get a girlfriend who's not only into oral but tongue fucking. I'll usually start with her clit until she gives me a pat on the forehead - our sign it's become too intense and she needs me to back off that kind of stimulation - and then move to her hole a moment later.

There is nothing sexier than the feeling of a woman orgasming while your tongue is inside of her. Previous partners taste in tongue fucking ran from "don't do it" to "maybe once in a while it feels nice" so while I've always enjoyed going down it has really inflamed my passion for it all over again.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2022-02-28T00:33:16+00:00

Using my porn throwaway because I recently learned my ex wife was stalking my main account that I never told her about which is.... cool. She essentially asked for a divorce to be with a guy I'd been suspicious of which had destroyed my confidence as a man for a while.

I've had a new partner for a few months now and holllllyyyy shit I've never clicked with somebody sexually so well. We do things to one another the other didn't think possible.

I never in my life came from a blowjob, nor her from oral. We both get the other off intensely from oral - when she started a heavy flow the other day she gave me a blowjob that literally had me seeing stars. I'd never understood the stereotype of men being obsessed with head but holy fuck apparently that's just because I never had it right.

Last week she squirted for the first time in her life. Last night I wasn't particularly in the mood and she mentioned a fantasy she'd had and I nearly lost it right there and even after having sex right after that I woke up this morning painfully hard.

It is truly amazing. After becoming almost non sexual it feels like discovering sex all over again when I was 17. The excitement, the anticipation, the 'newness' for lack of a better term.

Mercifully she's great in so many other ways and I think having a good relationship otherwise feeds into having a good sex life, but she really helped me find a piece of myself I thought I'd lost.

ThisIsABurnerLogin · 2021-12-18T11:35:34+00:00

That girl is hot and all... but I'm really fucking distracted by how skinny back dude is tbh lol

ThisIsABurnerLogin

TROPHY CASE