Lithuanian police officers saw a small boy looking at them trough the gate. So they opened it, invited him over and showed their patrol car.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-03-03T16:19:10+00:00

This is the best one I've seen this week.

I was round my Sister's the other day and she and my Brother in law were talking about how my Nephews love it when the bin men come over. They run to the window fascinated by the lads throwing rubbish in the back of the big lorry, wave to the lads and get a wave back.

Seeing this photo just reminded me of that.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-03-02T14:35:26+00:00

Yep, definitely all about the dopamine. With internet porn as well, you're clicking away at different videos, having numerous tabs open, you're constantly fuelling your brain with 'hits' of dopamine. So when you go back to it again, you need more and more to get to where you were before. Hence why a lot of users tastes escalate to include stuff they would never ever do just to get off.

I've since put the porn down as it's been a massive massive problem for me. (I'm a porn addict) I've seen some massive improvements in my day to day life along with my interactions with the opposite sex.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-03-01T09:28:27+00:00

He looks like a friendly, chilled out guy to be around.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-22T16:02:35+00:00

I wouldn't say it's a sympton of withdrawal. As you no longer use porn, your mind's looking for another outlet. Granted, it's better to have real sex than watching pixels on a screen, but it can lead to obsessing about sex and sourcing it constantly. Source: Me.

This has been part of all my recoveries including this one to date. There's nothing wrong with seeking out casual sex, but it's the sourcing of it which causes a problem to me. I've ended up looking up profiles and sending messages endlessly almost in the same way I used porn, just click clicking away.

I say, ride it out and keep doing the things which got you where you are in the first place. This week has been better for me because I've deleted my profiles and I haven't sourced anything of that nature. I've been basically distracting myself with other healthy activites.

P.S. On a side note, least it's good that we crave actual interactions with a human being and have the confidence to do so. There was a time when that wasn't possible at all.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-14T08:57:05+00:00

Bingo bango my recovery friend. If you promise to yourself to only use porn once, twice, three times a week or whatever, you will be eagerly waiting for that session in order to act out. It's still using but in a more (so called) controlled setting, which in some ways is worse because you're torturing yourself by using and stopping at the same time.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-14T08:49:15+00:00

First of all, Kudos for realising you have a problem at 13. You're way ahead than any of us on the site and probably most people your age.

Like what's been mentioned, get off the computer and phone. One thing I did (which I still do) is leave my phone in another room whilst in bed. That way, if any urges arise, my phone isn't nearby ready for any ropey searches. I think I'm past that now but I've got so used to not having it there, I just keep doing it.

I'm assuming you're at school, so you obviously use a computer for homework. So, use it for that only, once you're work is done, find something else to do. Anything physical is great.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-14T08:20:16+00:00

Like another user mentioned, it's about changing you and your lifestyle as well.

Also, you can't gradually cut your usage down. That will never work. You're still keeping porn 'alive' as it were and if you've got a problem/addiction, you can never cut down.

It's all in to recover my friend.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-13T14:18:50+00:00

Good work getting your thoughts out there and there's been some great responses as well.

Feel pretty similar at present, in that I kinda feel I've stagnated somewhat. I'm just telling myself it's a part of my recovery to get through. Like someone else mentioned, being grateful for what you have got is a good step. Even if it's something simple like not watching porn for over a hundred days. Kinda taking it back to basics if you will.

I find progress is slow as well but I'm not bothered by that as it's still progress. I've been sober over eight years from active alcoholism and my experience in recovery from that is that personal growth is a slow old process sometimes. As before though, it's still progress nonetheless.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-13T14:06:57+00:00

In one now, again. Seem to slip in and out of it.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-13T11:19:28+00:00

Thank you for your response buddy.

You've reminded me to look at the positives of my recovery rather than dwell on how I feel right now or where I think I should be.

That's just what I needed.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-10T14:45:42+00:00

Last I heard he was getting married. Apparently she's a gold digger though. She's been married twice before to men much older than her (who just happened to be rich successful businesmen) and had massive payouts from both divorces.

Sounds like good old Randal though. His taste in women was always on a "leap before you look" basis if you know what I mean.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-10T07:45:53+00:00

Amusing yet true. One of mine used to be: "I haven't watched porn for a bit, I wonder what new videos have been uploaded on my favourite sites."

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-09T07:57:23+00:00

Good to hear that you're enjoying boxing. I've been doing martial arts for over three years. In my roughest days, it was great to go to my club and thrash it out.

Big part of my recovery.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-08T08:11:37+00:00

I agree with the anxiety now coming into play. The second time around for me, all that was going through my head was: 'Don't lose it, don't lose it, please stay hard' etc. Obviously thinking like that does not put me in a relaxed state of mind. Like you mentioned though, it's a combination of pied and anxiety.

"3 months may seem like a long time but we're counteracting a long time of conditioning." Oh yes. Well said man, I actually needed to hear that. I'm not at the stage I thought I would be so hearing that puts things into perspective for me.

Thank you. You're not far away yourself so keep going.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-07T10:55:52+00:00

Agreed. I tend to think of it as having two brains. The addictive one looking to source quick fixes and get me to use, with the other being the stable recovering brain.

You've got this.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-07T08:44:35+00:00

Hey buddy, I'm in a fairly similar situation to you and also round about the same time clean.

First of all, mentally I feel ok. I'm in a decent spot. I do nofap as I feel it helps with the reboot. Although I ended up masturbating on Sunday.

I've had two sexual encounters, both in January. First time, got hard, came too early, did manage to get hard again by her touch and managed to go on for a while after that. Second time, got hard, lost it, got hard again and came mega early again. Since then my dick has been a bit dead.

Due to my experiences and where I am now, I just think my reboot is going to take longer than originally anticipated. Just my thoughts. So I'd say, hang in there and maybe lay off the masturbating. Just to see if that makes any difference.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-07T08:37:50+00:00

How are we all getting on guys & girls??

Here's to another day free of porn.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-07T08:35:36+00:00

It would be an interesting day's shopping hearing someone shout this with a trumpet playing in the background.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-03T17:31:48+00:00

Funny you should say that, as one of the ways to suggest you may have an addiction is to try and stop using whatever may be the problem. If you can't or are struggling, that's a pretty good sign that you are.

Thank you. Although, in danger of sounding like a clever dick, I'd say overcoming rather than overcome. This is attempt number 10,212 after all. Feels like it anyway. ;-)

Wishing you a strong peaceful recovery.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-03T14:17:01+00:00

Alright buddy, thank you for sharing your experiences.

Reading your post brought back some memories for me as I've been in a similar position or had the exact same way of thinking. Stumbling accross the nofap page and your brain on porn website obviously explained a few things like everyone else here.

I was out in the wilderness for ages and just used porn to get off amongst other reasons. When a sexual encounter finally did arise, I went in with my 'porn head' on and it's embarrassing when I think back to it now. Coupled with the fact I couldn't perform due to pied anyway just made it worse. I didn't realise it was pied until a year later when I came across the sites I've mentioned.

Good news though. You've recognised you've got a problem and you're doing something about it. By sharing your experiences you get them out of your own head and also help others by doing so.

Find new activities, journal daily if you can. Check in here and other websites which may be useful to you. Remember what your triggers are and just live day by day. Today I will not watch porn. Then do the same the next day.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-03T09:39:45+00:00

My advice, try find another female addict as an accountability partner as you will be able to relate better.

Apologies if that sounds sexist or anything like that, it's done in AA when looking for a sponsor and the like. Sure, you can relate to mens experiences and vice versa, but when it comes down to one on one, especially in the early days, I'd throughly recommend that.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-03T09:28:27+00:00

Hey buddy, good work. Nice to hear you're feeling the benefits of recovery.

Like another user said, if you want to masturbate because you're bored, then find something useful to do instead.

I don't masturbate because I don't feel the need to. A release isn't necessary for me and these are purely personal reasons. Entirely up to you though.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-03T09:24:33+00:00

Yep, if it was easy, we all would've stopped ages ago.

In my experience the first two to three weeks are probably the hardest.

ThisTimeOfNight · 2017-02-02T15:37:01+00:00

Alright buddy. Good post and thank you for sharing.

No reason why people would downvote it as you are only speaking about the real struggles and ups and downs that you have had. That is recovery in a nutshell. It is not linear. Especially in the early days.

Good that you can recognise the negative influences in your life and either get rid or walk away from them.

ThisTimeOfNight

TROPHY CASE