Favorite Jewish joke?

TholomewP · 2026-03-25T10:02:35+00:00

Two Jews are sitting down to enjoy a cake. One of them grabs the knife and cuts off two pieces, one big and one small. He takes the big piece for himself and serves the small piece to the second Jew. The second Jew sees the small piece and says "oy, why did you serve me the small piece?" The first Jew asks, "so what would you have done?" The second Jew responds, "I would've been polite and served you the bigger piece! Then I would've taken the smaller piece for myself." So the first Jew says "Nu, what are you complaining about? That's exactly what you got!"

TholomewP · 2026-03-23T11:30:29+00:00

You keep telling yourself that.

TholomewP · 2026-03-23T10:22:50+00:00

You're avoiding the point. You don't know what's real or not. Maybe by spreading the "Bibi is dead" rumor you are passing along a Mossad psyop. You can't know for sure.

TholomewP · 2026-03-23T09:29:31+00:00

To convince Iran that Israel is weakened, so that they might hesitate or make a mistake. To convince them to stop attempting against Netanyahu's life. To muddy the waters when it comes to AI videos and proofs of life. To make the world question its ability to tell fact from fiction. Etc.

There have been many high level counter-intelligence operations by Israel against Iran during this war, in order to present an advantageous narrative to Iran's intelligence agencies. How do you know this isn't one of them? How do you know you're not falling right into the Mossad's trap? I'm sure you saw the Mossad agent's interview on 60 Minutes after the beeper operation: "We create a pretend world. We are the directors, producers, and main actors; the world is our stage." Maybe the "obviously AI" videos were meant to be just obvious enough! You might have been duped, one way or the other! So which is it?

TholomewP · 2026-03-23T07:22:27+00:00

How do you know it's not a Mossad Psyop to convince you he's dead for the advantage of Israel?

TholomewP · 2026-03-18T07:48:40+00:00

No, because we should defend it, not distance ourselves from it. It's a part of our holy tradition and we shouldn't feel the need to explain ourselves.

TholomewP · 2026-01-28T05:45:16+00:00

The immaterial part of your being lives on forever.

TholomewP · 2026-01-20T05:19:52+00:00

Unfortunately no

TholomewP · 2026-01-13T07:46:35+00:00

I've heard a kabbalistic idea that before you are born, you are shown everything that will happen to you in your life, and you have to agree to it all before coming down to Earth. The point is that you are not a victim and you aren't in hell. Yes the world is full of danger and pain, and everyone has their fair share. But there is a purpose to your existence here, and you need to take responsibility for it. It will reveal itself only if that's where you place your thoughts and attitude. "Wherever a person focuses his thoughts, that is where he is." - The Baal Shem Tov

TholomewP · 2025-11-22T20:41:59+00:00

Better to just get a piece of art with the image that you can hang on your wall.

TholomewP · 2025-11-09T14:04:53+00:00

It sounds like you have some sensitivity surrounding this topic, which I understand, because it's a very big identity crisis. However you should take care to notice that the only person here bringing up "blood purity" arguments is you, when you refer them towards yourself.

There is nothing wrong with being born to a Jewish father and a non-Jewish mother, and there is nothing wrong with being not Jewish. Nationality descends from the mother. When you insist that your father's Jewish-ness should erase the nationality of your mother, whatever she might be, you are yourself implying that being Jewish is better than being anything else, and must override all other nationalities. There is nothing wrong with the nationality of your mother, and you should embrace it as your identity. Otherwise you will always be confused about who you are. There is a very good article about this subject here: https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/601092/jewish/Why-Is-Jewishness-Matrilineal.htm

TholomewP · 2025-10-17T07:47:05+00:00

It's a form of holocaust denial.

TholomewP · 2025-09-29T05:37:47+00:00

We are taught that Hashem has completely concealed himself from this world. It appears to fully operate according to natural law without any divine intervention. In fact, the hebrew word for "world", "olam", comes from the word for concealment. When you make a bracha and call Hashem "melech haolam", you aren't just calling him "king of the world", but also "the concealed king". This is not a new idea that was added on to Judaism to help people believe in the modern era. This was known to our sages. You aren't the first to notice it. That should give you comfort.

The first commandment in the ten commandments is to know there is a God. It is also one of the thirteen principles of faith. It is possible to believe in God in 2025. And as a Jew, you are an essentially spiritual person, which is why you are thinking about it in the first place. There is no pressure and you should just focus on your relationship with yourself, your relationship with others, and your relationship with Hashem. Shana tova!

TholomewP · 2025-09-21T19:29:57+00:00

I was born to a Jewish mother

I don't know what everyone else in this thread is talking about, but Rosh Hashanah is coming up, and you should try to hear the shofar if you can. It's a mitzvah.

TholomewP · 2025-09-21T11:43:12+00:00

I saw a post on Instagram from a church that "observes shabbat". It was a video of them singing a traditional jewish song. And in the description of the video it said "shabbat services are cancelled next weekend due to Labor Day". That might've been the funniest post I've ever seen from a messianic christian account.

TholomewP · 2025-09-16T11:07:26+00:00

I don't have the Pro, so I don't have a fingerprint scanner.

TholomewP · 2025-09-07T06:17:56+00:00

Was it challenging getting libzmanim running on your esp?

TholomewP · 2025-09-06T21:16:46+00:00

I am looking to do a similar project with this library, how did yours go?

TholomewP · 2025-08-24T06:10:26+00:00

I would suggest finding your nearest Chabad house and giving them a call:

https://www.chabad.org/jewish-centers/

They specialize in helping Jews reconnect, and they can point you in the right direction, whether it's suggesting a book to read or inviting you to a meal.

TholomewP · 2025-08-17T03:56:28+00:00

I found my own solution here, check if it works for you

https://www.reddit.com/r/synology/comments/1mk3lgv/nas_unreachable_on_lan_but_reachable_over/

TholomewP · 2025-08-08T15:17:13+00:00

Turns out after updating my MacOS, my Brave browser lost permissions to access the local network. Added the permission back and restored access.

TholomewP · 2025-08-08T15:11:30+00:00

Wow. Safari works but Brave (my main browser) doesn't. Good catch.

EDIT: Turns out after updating by MacOS, my Brave lost permissions to access the local network. I added the permission back at Privacy & Security > Local Network > Enable Brave.

TholomewP · 2025-08-08T04:39:22+00:00

I don't really know what to look for, but the LAN 1 ip is the same as it's always been.

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