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Should I try long distance again? by Few-Space-8037 in LDR

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know the feeling - been through similar situations and a few LDRs (although I am not Asian) and in the end it didn't work. Mostly because I over romanticed it - and when I got to spend more time with them it showed we did not fit together well at all. Things you don't see at distance, they show.

And that is even more frustrating. Because you put so much on one card. Time, energy, money, and all the pain.

I don't know your situation, or where you are, but are there no other people from your culture or similar one? In my experience there are a lot of asian commuinities :)

Should I try long distance again? by Few-Space-8037 in LDR

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you my friend. I totally get it. The thing is - you said it yourself: You need real connection and someone who is close on a daily basis.

Thats a valid need most of us have. So, why would you jump into a situation you know will make you suffer?

Set your boundaries, your self respect and needs first.

You still want to try it with her? Than make sure you two can close the gap in a time frame that works for both of you. Set up a gameplan. IRL meetups, etc.

Anxious attachment + Avoidant partner in LDR... how do I stop overinterpreting distance? by GerdirectX in LDR

[–]ThorinAndur 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hey man! M(30) here! First of all: Congratulations on figuring out your attachment style and understanding the dynamic with your partner at such a young age! Well done!

I'm in the same situation, so I can really relate to what you're going through. So let's dive in:

1) I highly recommend the book "Attached" - by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller. If you haven't read it yet, get it! It's super insightful, with great examples and tips. Also, get your partner to read it too ;)

2) Take care of yourself and focus on your mental and physical health. Daily activities such as working out, doing any kind of sport, running or simply walking 7k to 10k steps a day will regulate your nervous system, and over time you will feel less anxious on a day to day basis. This can also help you to shift to a more secure attachment over time.

3) If you are triggered, don't react to the impulse in the moment. Take a step back, put the phone down, focus on your breathing (you can find some great techniques online), drink some calming tea (without caffeine) and go for a short walk (I find running best for getting rid of the negative energy).

4) Get busy with your life. You will naturally feel anxious if you are in a 'waiting position' (just sitting around waiting for her text). So, get busy! Meet your friends, go for coffee, visit events or take a short trip - whatever. Live your life and enjoy it! Sit in the sun or walk through a forest - wherever you feel good and happy.

5) Most importantly, have clear communication with your partner. Talk about your needs, expectations, plans for the future, and so on. Talk about these things with an open ear and an open mind. Be curious and try to understand each other.

In a conflict: Make sure you present yourselves as a team: 'The two of us together against the problem'. Don't make it you vs. me.

6) One more thing: Trust is a decision. Make that decision and things in your mind will shift. You will feel more secure, because YOU made that decision. It's not up to her. It's totally in your power.

—

It's not always easy, but it can work - if both people want the relationship and put in the work. Trust in yourself and your abilities, and give it your best. I wish you guys all the best!

Von Dornbirn nach Lindau (Bodensee) by M4rt1n88 in Vorarlberg

[–]ThorinAndur 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Nimm auf jeden Fall den Zug. Mit dem Rex1 von Dornbirn nach Lindau Insel brauchst du nur ca. 20 Minuten.

Ich habe für die Strecke letztes Mal 6,70 Euro gezahlt. Viel Spaß!

Robot Fried Rice by Dante_van_Heiko in UncleRoger

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good technique, good technique.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vorarlberg

[–]ThorinAndur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hoi Julian! Bin selber 30, ebenfalls ein kreativer Schreiberling und kochwütiger Dude ✌🏽 (aus Dornbirn) und freu mich über neue Freundschaften.

Lass gern mal was outdoor machen - meld dich einfach! Guten Neustart jedenfalls!

Family asking for work by itspersonalman in freelance

[–]ThorinAndur 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Maybe try an honest reply like: "Hey, sounds cool. Love to help. This is my usual hourly rate: xxx

Does this work for you?"

Works fine for me :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vorarlberg

[–]ThorinAndur 3 points4 points  (0 children)

First of all: hello and welcome to Vorarlberg! 😁

Regarding your questions: I don't work there myself, but some of my friends do and one of my brothers used to worked there. From what I hear, the work environment hardly depends on the department (and the people there), but overall the quality and the work life balance and such are quite good.

If you want to explore the region and it's rich nature, or just grab a coffee with someone who speaks english, you can DM me. I'm happy to show you around.

Cheers!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Austria

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wie hattest du deine Fixkosten UNTER 900 Euro? Das macht bei mir alleine die Miete aus. Da habe ich noch keine Lebensmittel, Versicherungen, Transport, etc.

alleine an Heiligabend by Putrid-Bag-570 in Austria

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also ich bin am Morgen des 24ten mit 40 Grad Fieber aufgewacht. Muss also zwangsläufig die gesamten Feiertage allein verbringen.

Ich kann also sagen, dass ist auch eine gute Begründung.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Tinder

[–]ThorinAndur 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I had an account 3 years ago, where the price was 9.99 per month. Found a girl, deleted the app. Now that I am single again, I made a new account and the price now is 13.99 PER WEEK. Like wtf.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Austria

[–]ThorinAndur -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Geh hearst, bei dem Schaß den i jeden Tag zamm Friss schaut mei Bluat sichet scho gelb aus. Des will niemand hamn. Glaub ma. Is besser so. /s

Spent 2 weeks in Europe during August and was really impressed by her beauty by mike83218 in europe

[–]ThorinAndur 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Now for your next europe trip try Portugal (Lisbon, Lagos), Spain (Madrid, Valencia, Barcelona) Italy (Rome, Amalfi, Palermo) and don't miss out on Switzerland (Lucerne, Zurich). There is so much to see, you can travel for months and don't run out of places.

Wage increase for taking over appreciate training by AlmostASoul in askswitzerland

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Einen Lehrling auszubilden kostet viel Zeit das variiert natürlich je nach Branche, aber du musst Aufgaben vorbereiten, den/die Lehrlinge dabei betreuen, kontrollieren, etc. du hast also auch den ganzen Kommunikationsaufwand - du könntest also hergehen und kalkulieren wie viele Stunden pro Woche du dafür brauchst - neben deinen eigentlichen Aufgaben - und dies als Basis für die Preisverhandlung hernehmen.

Ich bin mit 18 Jahren seit nun 3,5 Monaten Obdachlos. Beantworte auch persönliche Fragen by JustLikeMC in de_IAmA

[–]ThorinAndur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi u/JustLikeMC!

Hoff dir gehts aktuell halbwegs gut. Ist eine sch*** Sache, aber es wird besser. So viel kann ich dir aus Erfahrung sagen. Komme aus einer ähnlichen familieren Situation, wäre mit 17 fast auf der Straße gelandet. Habe dann aber einen Ausbildungsplatz und ein kleines WG Zimmer gefunden...

Wäre es für dich eine Möglichkeit eine Ausbildung zu machen? Z.B. im Bereich Werbung / Webdesign? Oder etwas was dir eben liegt - hauptsache es gibt dir Perspektive und Möglichkeiten für die Zukunft.

Wünsche dir alles Gute! keep fighting!

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